Did I do the right thing?

[Ellabella8999]

So I’m 36 weeks pregnant today. At 9:30am a health visit rang the intercom saying that she’s here to see me. She said they usually do a home visit around this time just in case the baby arrives early. I’m completely baffled at this point. She said I should’ve received a letter that she sent a FEW WEEKS ago, however I’ve received nothing at all. I’ve been to all of my appointments and scans and not once has anyone mentioned that they’d be visiting around this time. I didn’t feel comfortable letting a stranger in as I’m in the flat by myself and 36 weeks pregnant, so I told her we’d have to reschedule, she then asked for my number, surely she should’ve had my number!! I then called my community midwife to confirm that they’d sent someone out which they did. According to them my midwife should’ve told me that someone would be coming! I was still half asleep and the place is a bit messy right now and I’m actually fuming. If I’d known she was coming today, even without a time it would’ve been fine but she could’ve been anyone, especially when she didn’t even have a number to contact me on! They’ve now just called me to book. Did I do the right thing by not letting her in? I don’t want them to feel like I’m hiding something 😂

I think you did. Yes it has ended up being a bit inconvenient to everyone but tough luck. The asking for your phone number I would have found suspicious too. The only thing would have been to call whilst she was on the doorstep. But I know it's often not that easy to get hold of a midwife!

I don't think anyone can answer that; really.

I'm 29 weeks pregnant and got a letter last week that they'd usually send a health visitor to visit between 32 - 38 weeks pregnant; but that they'll call instead due to the pandemic... so where I am, it doesn't look like they give you notice of the appointment in advance, but it does say that it's just a home visit and not to worry about it.

If you told them you weren't expecting them and it wasn't convenient, you'll likely be fine. I don't think you have to have the health visitor at all, if you don't want to. It'd be down to the individual health visitors/team to make whatever judgements they'd make from that; but you'd think they'd understand, and have encountered this before!

I don't think health visitor stuff gets mentioned at midwife appts or scans... it's not a midwife service. I'm quite impressed the community midwife knew anything about it!

Absolutely! I would have done the same. There’s no harm in them rearranging and it’s also not your fault that you hadn’t received an appointment letter. You can never be too careful so I absolutely think you did the right thing x

I'd have done the same, in fact I'd have done the same to anyone that turned up without a confirmed appointment (other than family or friends of course 😂).

I had to go a bit hard-line on ours first time as she TOLD me when she was next coming and I said unfortunately that clashes with the appointment we've made to register DD so would need to reschedule. She was quite put out but hadn't really got a leg to stand on.

You did the right thing.

There was a story in the news a few years ago that’s always stayed with me. I think it’s because my son was a few weeks old when it happened and in my sleep deprived state I couldn’t work out whether I would have fallen for it or not. Basically two young adults masqueraded as health visitors to try and abduct a baby. They told the mother they needed to take the baby for some medical tests and would return him. She told them no and they scarpered but it made my blood run cold at the time.