Breastfeeding positive stories?

[Nicola2182]

Hi all

I would like to breastfeed but everywhere I read are complete horror stories (bleeding nipples/baby losing weight/mastitis etc) and how difficult it is! I'm thinking is it worth the stress?

Its hard, really hard. And I think bf rates in the UK are so low due to the unrealistic expectations women are given about it. You really do have to take it 1 hour at a time the first 6-8 weeks because it's relentless.
It can be "hard, really hard" and the first few weeks can be relentless for a few weeks but that isn't an inevitability. For me, and a lot of other women on this thread that isn't the case. Yes it is good to be honest and for every women to be aware that it can be difficult but the narrative that it definitely will be a relentless slog for weeks and weeks is just as inaccurate as the one that says it's all blissfully easy. Both are possibilities, neither are certainties.

I feel really lucky with how breastfeeding went for me. It is a skill you have to learn (I was surprised at first at how unnatural it felt), but once you’ve got it it does feel natural and becomes really easy.

By around 4 weeks post birth both baby and I were confident in what we were doing, and by around 10 weeks we had settled into some sort of feeding routine (not forced at all, it just kind of happened naturally).

I did have once bout of mastitis very early on, but was short lived and easily treated.

I totally appreciate people have different experiences, but for me breastfeeding really wasn’t stressful (don’t mention naps and weaning around the six-month mark, which were a totally different story!) I would say give it ago if you want to x

Every baby is different, just give it a go you might be lucky and have an easy time of it! I might take some work to get it right or it may be really difficult, get yourself good support if it is, LA Leche league or get someone who is trained to check for tongue tie. Look at u tube for videos to get the latch right, if the latch is good then as long as baby isn’t tongue tied or anything then it should go ok. Also remember that once baby gets bigger they can just be fed a few times a day and don’t need to be offered breast every 10mins!! I found it easier than making and carrying bottles but every one was different, last (3rd) hardest of all! Good luck!

My mum breastfed all 4 of us with absolutely no problems - no pain, no mastitis, nothing else, latching first time etc; she fed me until I was about 3yrs old or a bit longer and I remember it (just if I asked for it on long journeys, if I was ill etc, it wasn't a standard thing by then!). She was so unusual at the time (my eldest brother was born 1979) and she confidently used to feed everywhere, she was asked to be photographed feeding my brother on the front cover of Scotland's nursing and midwifery magazine. It's a great photo! She's not a stereotypical 'earth-mother' or anything, she's a Latin and English teacher and my dad's a physics lecturer. They just thought women create milk for a reason, so why wouldn't you, and went for it. I didn't have such an easy experience but that's because my son has a genetic neurological condition from my husband which affects his feeding (he's 2yo now and still can't eat many solids as it has made weaning hard too).

I think though, it is important to know the difficulties that can arise and look out for mastitis symptoms, as my breastfeeding class didn't prepare me for that and I hadn't prepared myself for any problems. Breastfeeding was everything to me. Because of my mum's experience and it has taken me a long long time to get over it. I had an incredibly unusual situation though which I won't go into as it's not typical at all. Do learn about mastitis symptoms, and find out what bf support is in your area - many babes need a little help with latch, but nothing more for instance. Go for it! It's such a wonderful thing and I hope I'll get another chance at it before long 🥰

Breast fed my eldest son who was premmie and in hospital for a month. I had to express over night and nurse him when I was there and even with me away from him for 12 hours at night we still established breastfeeding and success fully left hospital exclusively breastfeeding. There was no pain at all no bleeding, no latching problems etc. I did stop breastfeeding about about 5 months because I was worried he wasn't going enough weight ( if I had had more reassurance I would have carried on).

Second son was full term was nursing within 20 mins of being born as before no pain no bleeding, no latch problems etc. And my milk came in with 12 hours! I breastfed him until he was 3 even after returning to work part time from 6 months.

Also I never had any negative comment or looks when breastfeeding in public and I wasn't particularly discrete as my son was massive and I'm very tiny! In fact I usually had people say well done for breastfeeding him!

After the initial first few weeks for me it was a breeze, you can feed your baby whenever and where ever you want, you are providing them the best start in life with regards to nutrients and also saving a small fortune in formula! (And no washing up!) If you can try I definitely would if I were you, OP, but it can be hard to push past those initial hurdles to get the benefits. There is a lot of help out there though. Good luck!

I was just thinking about the 'relentless' comments.
You do feed a lot in the early days, but as a pp said, if the baby is fractious you can soothe it with a comforting feed.
Feeds are a lovely way to relax with your baby. It's really a case of getting a good latch. I loved trusting my body and not fretting about how much they were taking. Wet nappies meant they were getting enough, and having three strapping adults now proves the obsession with percentiles is unnecessary. They were all a bit on the small side but I'm petite and their dad is tall and slim, so I got away with it with the health visitor.
I'm supportive of bottle feeding as any mother's choice, but I do feel saddened that breast feeding is so often presented as the more difficult option.

We combination fed as DS couldn’t latch properly to start with - it improved after having his tongue tie clipped when he was 10 days old but my supply had dwindled by then so it was around 50/50 breastmilk and formula. It was all quite exhausting - trying to put him on the breast, expressing and then preparing formula on top of all that - but that didn’t make it unpleasant. It was still a positive experience for me. Breastfeeding when it finally worked was very cosy and enjoyable, even if it wasn’t EBF. Obviously cracked nipples and mastitis are no walk in the park, but there really doesn’t need to be this intense pressure to exclusively breastfeed if it’s just not working properly - I think that’s where half the ‘horror’ comes from, when people feel pressure to keep going or feel like they’ve failed rather than giving themselves a break. Combination all the way for me, unless the next one happily latches on.

I had a positive experience, although I will say for me the first couple of months were tough. I didn’t have any bleeding nipples, mastitis or baby weight issues at all however the main early challenges were more to do with the frequency of feeding. My baby had colic and I think this made her comfort feed more so this probably isn’t your typical experience, she used to feed very often and it’d take 45 mins in the early weeks so it’s a big adjustment!

So even though the first two months were tough...once feeding was established I honestly think it made things so much easier! I never had to take bottles out with me or worry about amounts etc just fed on demand, I didn’t have to go downstairs to warm bottles in middle of the night. I could pick her up out of next to me crib with my eyes closed, feed laying in my side and either cosleep (google safe cosleeping positions / trips) or put back in side car cot which made nights so, so easy. After a few months baby didn’t take 45 mins to feed she took 5-10 mins and only a few times a day. I fed till 1 year and only stopped because of a second pregnancy.

Good luck, don’t put too much pressure on yourself as every baby is different. Some take to it very well naturally, some have complications like colic or tongue tie which make it very hard. I think it’s always worth a shot unless people feel strongly otherwise for personal reasons etc

I think it’s worth remembering that people only post when things are going well hence you will see more negativity than positive, I breastfed all 4 of mine till 2+ years, they’ve never had a drop of formula, I never found it hard, it just felt natural to me and if anything easy! I would have hated to formula feed and wouldn’t choose to unless I really couldn’t breastfeed. Never had any trouble with it I even bf after 2 emcs and one with tongue tie. Everyone’s experience will be different and people only tend to post when it goes wrong.

I’m another that’s never had bleeding nipples mastitis or weight gain issues, it was all smooth for me.

I fed both mine until they were almost 1. It was lovely but also hard, especially at the beginning until you get the hang of it plus lots of frequent feeds. I had cracked nipples, mastitis and vasospasm but still would do it again. Most important thing is to get support. I couldn't have done it without a weekly breastfeeding support group.

I failed breast feeding my first but that was due to not learning enough about it, and thinking it would be easy, it wasn't, I'm now successfully breast feeding my second child, she's nearly 11 months , it was hard, I did cry alot, through pain, exhaustion, thinking I'm a failure, but again I was learning as I was going so I'd suggest learning as much as you can about breast feeding before you have your baby. Growth spurts, building supply, baby behaviour, ect.. the first 3 months are tough but if you can get through that and not supplement you will be set to breast feed easily untill you and your little one are ready to wean.

@Sexnotgender

I think the big problem is we as women DON’T really see other women doing it and so we don’t really have any visual experience of it.

It’s natural but you need to learn how to do it.

Yes totally this.

Humans are brilliant at copying each other it's what we do but we never see each other doing this.

It is hard at first but then so easy, I struggle to be organised when tired and you can't forget to pack your breasts.

I feed two of mine until 2 and the youngest until 3.

I found it hard at first, I’ve bf four babies now and the beginning at each time I’ve come close to quitting and then it just gets easier. It can be very enjoyable because it releases a lot of feel good hormones too.

Absolutely!

Breast milk adapts to your baby's changing needs so that as baby grows up, it's composition is tailored to baby's requirements. It gives your baby protection from your antibodies. It gives your baby natural pain relief.

Then there's the practical benefits like cost and flexibility when out etc.

I'm 14 weeks in and so glad I stuck with it! I had to pump for the first 8 weeks and cup feed, but once tongue tie was sorted at 9 weeks and baby could latch we were away!

There's nothing like the feeling of looking at my baby dozing off cuddling my boob in a milk coma!