Breastfeeding positive stories?

[Nicola2182]

Hi all

I would like to breastfeed but everywhere I read are complete horror stories (bleeding nipples/baby losing weight/mastitis etc) and how difficult it is! I'm thinking is it worth the stress?

I had a slight problem getting DD to latch the first night. But after that, I genuinely found it really easy straight away. I was also lucky that she took a bottle of expressed milk easily when she started nursery and now she’s 27 months and just feeds occasionally first thing in the morning or last thing at night but I think she stopping that now.

Breastmilk contains thousands of components, scientists are still working out what ask the different bits do. It's amazing stuff, breastfeeding cuts your cancer risk and has lifelong benefits for your baby. It also reduces risk of pnd.

I get the 'fed is best' thing and sometimes it is better on balance not to breastfeed, but I don't think people talk enough about what breastmilk contains.

Breastfeeding my firstborn was stressful, we did combi feeding at first and had tongue tie snipped. By 3 months ish it was fine and the easiest thing in the world. Dc2 came out, latched on and I had zero problems feeding him.

Never had sore nipples (maybe they're rubbery, who knows?!) Never had mastitis despite blocked ducts a few times. Never got told to put my boobs away. Had challenges now and then but overall it was a very positive experience. I breastfed dc1 until 22mo and dc2 until 15mo.

This has quite a good breakdown of what is in breastmilk www.medela.com/breastfeeding/mums-journey/breast-milk-composition

I read that a baby can encounter a bug, through the baby's saliva the bug passes to the mother whose body makes antibodies that are secreted in the milk, preventing the bug from taking hold - basically your battery makes medicine for your baby without you even knowing it.

It is really difficult to begin with and can be painful as you describe.
But after a few weeks you both get the hang and it becomes second nature.
So much easier than bottles :)

In the long term I mean!

I breastfed both mine with no problems at all even tandem at one point as they were close together in age.
I now work in infant feeding and we support many women to breastfeed who would have had to stop without that support. Sometimes it's some simple changes to positioning that make all the difference. Find out what support is available to you and get as much info about infant feeding as you can to help you on your journey.

I utterly loved it. Once we’d got the hang of it (me and baby) it was so easy to be able to get out and about without worrying about how I’d feed him. The cuddles are the best. The little warm-mammal snuffling noises of a hungry baby finding milk are lovely. And yes to learning to feed lying down and cosleeping - they learn to find a nipple and help themselves and you can often stay mostly asleep.

I had a tough time with my first baby but found excellent support with La leche league (find them, visit them while pregnant, also read Emma Picketts book) so I got through it and it became a good experience.

I then had a brilliant time feeding my second, she’s an amazingly good feeder and it’s been a really good experience from day 1

It's very much worth the stress, because once your past those first few weeks it's plain sailing. Then you get health benefits for both you and your baby and milk for baby on tap whereever you are.
I struggled with my first, I advise lansinoh and taking advice from all and sundry until something clicks! I fed 1st for 2.5 years, then 2nd had no probs at all and fed for 3.5 years.
I think for the majority of people the difficulties of breastfeeding are short lived, for a minority it never gets easier and they have to stop, but on balance, we'll worth a shot!

*well

It is bliss when you get the hang of it. I didnt with my first but trusted my body the second time round. It is the most special thing. I stopped when he was 2 1/2 yo only because i was spooked with covid jab

@JustAnotherUserinParadise

I think people just like to tell you horror stories! I was also worried - spent so much time reading horror stories online that I convinced myself it'd be awful and so difficult. I even bought those premade little bottles of formula to take with me, which are still unopened (my DD is now 7.5 months). We actually had no trouble at all really. She knew what she wanted, and once I stopped getting in her way we were totally fine! This video is really good, and the lady narrating has a lovely calming tone! globalhealthmedia.org/portfolio-items/breastfeeding-attachment/ At the start it was a little difficult just because of how often she wanted to feed (basically all the time), but after a couple of weeks it was super easy. Those mothers that you see in cafes etc making it look easy have probbaly been doing it a couple of months! the FTM of newborns are at home just feeding 24/7!

That video was so helpful! Thanks

I won't lie and say it was easy at the start. The first six weeks I really struggled with my first (and the first two weeks with my second), but I haven't ever (touch wood) got mastitis and my babies both gained weight at an impressive rate with never any hint of concern from any HCP. After the initial struggle it was literally the easiest thing in the world and I loved just being able to grab a little changing roll up and leave the house without faffing around with hot water and sterilisers first. I have breastfed both my kids and am still feeding my youngest on demand at nearly a year old.

My top tips: They say if it hurts you're doing it wrong. This is, in my experience, a lie. Of course it hurts. Your nipples aren't used to being sucked on for hours every day (they shouldn't actually suck the nipple, it's more of a mouth open and shut action around the areola, but still). If baby seems to be getting milk and you've had the latch checked, but it still hurts, it might just be general soreness. And even if the latch is usually good, one bad latch not corrected quickly enough can do some damage. So, my advice:

• Don't be afraid of painkillers in the early days. Keep topped up with paracetamol and ibuprofen if it starts to hurt (you may well need them just for the recovery from birth regardless of breastfeeding TBH).
• Lasinoh. Put it on after every feed.
• Look into local breastfeeding support groups now so that you know where they are ahead of time. Facebook is a great place to start looking.
• Lasinoh disposable breast pads are the best
• You can justify all the cake you like when you're breastfeeding.
• Prep your partner now; you will not be doing the housework. You will be immobilised by a suckling baby. He needs to prepare to pull his socks up.
• In the first 1-3 days before milk comes in, baby is likely to fuss and struggle and cry and feed for literally hours and you'll worry you're starving the poor thing and feel hormonal and guilty and miserable. This is totally normal. The baby's stomach is tiny at this point. They're getting enough and just putting in their order for the next few days. Do not panic. Sleep when you can.

Enjoy it.

I love breastfeeding. I'm still bf my 19 month old alongside my newborn. I've never had any issues with it. The only issue was cracked and sore nipples for about 3 days. Other than that it's been a beautiful, emotional and bonding experience for me. Nothing can beat staring down at your tiny child whilst they feed- it's just you and them and peace and quiet and love. My 19 month old only feeds for comfort now but I really like being able to offer her that as it immediately calms her down if she is overtired or emotional.

Other great things- it releases happy hormones for the mother so makes you feel relaxed, helps you to lose weight, is easy as you always have your boobs with you in easy access and no need for cleaning/sterilising etc.

My major tip is to educate yourself about what it's meant to look like and feel like before baby arrives. I really rate the book "baby led breastfeeding" by Gill someone (forget the name sorry). You can get it on Amazon. I credit that book for me finding bf so easy- I knew what I was looking for in the early days and had the confidence to trust me and my baby. I think a lot of women think because it's natural then it should come naturally but I think it's a skill that you need to understand. As others have said we rarely see people bf in our community these days which means women don't have a lot of information about how it should look. There's such a lack of information and support for women out there but it can be a fabulous journey. I didn't find it hard at all and was really surprised by that as I had been expecting to find it hard because of all the horror stories I had heard like you- in fact I was more worried about bf than birth!

I breastfed three. I don't know if it was just luck, but I found it very easy and convenient. My mum was horrified because I fed on demand. As a 60s baby, I and my siblings were on a 4 hourly feeding programme, as poor mum was led to believe that feeding them on demand made babies spoilt. She left us in the garden so she didn't have to hear us cry. She's sad about that now.
Anyway, maybe it's because I grew up on a farm, but I just sort of assumed that bottles were for emergencies only
Good luck OP. Once feeding is established it's easier IMO because there's none of the faff with sterilising etc.
I fed mine for about six months each, then as I got busier, did a bit of combination feeding so I could leave them longer with other people(pumps were rubbish in the 80s)
My milk supply gradually reduced due to lack of use, which suited me, and they were fully bottle fed by 8 months ( by then they slept all night so I didn't need the convenience of being able to whip a boob out by then)
Just give it a go, if that's what you want, but try not to fret over it.

I’ll echo the first six weeks thing. I really wanted to breastfeed because I have asthma and allergies and read that breastfeeding can reduce the chances. The first week was awful because I’d had an emergency c section, so was in pain and knackered. When I got home it was slightly better, but really painful. What really helped was my mum saying that the first six weeks were the hardest and joining the breast feeding group in my local surestart centre (it’s criminal that so many have now been shut or have very limited remit). If I had another child now I think I would pay for a breastfeeding consultant for a few days just to get established. I ended up exclusively breastfeeding for 16 months - never found it particularly easy like my friend who could do it in a sling and all sorts, but it was never painful after the first few weeks.
Good luck, op.

I've breastfed all three of my children and the most difficult was the second, it wasn't that bad.

DS1 - had to get some help with latching initially. For a few days could only feed lying down :o After this was sorted it was easy - I did use Lansinoh if my nipples got sore, which healed them quickly, and I continued until he self weaned.

DS2 - we got separated after birth as he had to go to SCBU in a different hospital. I pumped but not very successfully. He was given formula. When we got back together my milk supply hadn't quite caught up with what he needed, and it took 6 days for my milk to come in rather than the usual 3. I did lots of skin to skin, ignored the advice (which luckily I knew was bad) to limit feed times, woke him up if he slept too long, expressed a bit and breastfed as much as possible with formula top ups until he was 4 months old. Then the formula wasn't really needed so we dropped it and he breastfed until I got pregnant again and developed a hormonal aversion to it.

DS3 - 6 weeks old. Latched on 10 minutes after he was born and it's been smooth sailing ever since!

IME, the best thing you can have is information to counter the stream of breastfeeding related myths, unhelpful comments and doubts that will come your way in the weeks after birth. There are lots of places to get info but I find the most effective is following some BF experts on social media (I like Amy Brown and Lucy Ruddle, there are others too) and going to a local support group if there is one.

There are also good books and videos about breastfeeding if you look for them.

19 months of breastfeeding here. Zero problems except oversupply at the beginning. I'd be feeding the baby and the couch would be drenched in milk from the other side. I brought a hakaa to collect the milk in the end to stop the mess.

My situation was different due to staying home even before lockdown as I was all worried about covid with a new born so I'm aware my experience was really different as I wouldn't have been able to feed the way I did in 'normal' times.

• braless all the time (no bra ever)
• breasts visible to the baby when possible
• no schedule feeding, fed on demand and for babies comfort whenever she wanted.
• didn't ever wonder if she was feeding enough or too much just made sure she had access when ever and offered lots too.
• didn't worry about my boobs turning me into a full on cow. Saw the milk as gift to my baby which was my honour to provide rather than worrying about sagging etc

We had no problems and no sore nipples or blocked ducts or anything. I couldn't have done it like this if we weren't headed towards a lockdown as my family would've thought I was nuts and guided me another way.

I got the advice about breastfeeding in this type of way from some hippy groups who birth at home with no medical help 🤔I didn't do that bit but the advice came in handy.

Might not have had anything to do with it but my baby cried very little and slept well too. The hippies said that would be an outcome but honestly I realllly don't know if that's just how she would've been anyway.

@almaonao

19 months of breastfeeding here. Zero problems except oversupply at the beginning. I'd be feeding the baby and the couch would be drenched in milk from the other side. I brought a hakaa to collect the milk in the end to stop the mess.

My situation was different due to staying home even before lockdown as I was all worried about covid with a new born so I'm aware my experience was really different as I wouldn't have been able to feed the way I did in 'normal' times.

• braless all the time (no bra ever)
• breasts visible to the baby when possible
• no schedule feeding, fed on demand and for babies comfort whenever she wanted.
• didn't ever wonder if she was feeding enough or too much just made sure she had access when ever and offered lots too.
• didn't worry about my boobs turning me into a full on cow. Saw the milk as gift to my baby which was my honour to provide rather than worrying about sagging etc

We had no problems and no sore nipples or blocked ducts or anything. I couldn't have done it like this if we weren't headed towards a lockdown as my family would've thought I was nuts and guided me another way.

I got the advice about breastfeeding in this type of way from some hippy groups who birth at home with no medical help 🤔I didn't do that bit but the advice came in handy.

Might not have had anything to do with it but my baby cried very little and slept well too. The hippies said that would be an outcome but honestly I realllly don't know if that's just how she would've been anyway.

Neither of my babies cry. I think I've heard my newborn cry for about 5 minutes the whole time she's been here. It could be that I'm very lucky (which I am) but I also think that bf on demand plays a big part. If she starts to fuss or ask for food I shove a boob in her mouth!!

I think this thread is really interesting- thanks for starting it. It seems to be clear that a lot of women want to bf but a lot find it hard and need more support than they actually get via the NHS. I've been thinking about using some of my maternity leave to get some training and become a consultant either via the La Leche League or more formal training so that I can help to support women with it. I might consider it more seriously as it definitely seems like it's needed.

First time round I found it incredibly difficult, however I hadn't planned on breastfeeding so wasn't prepared for things like cluster feeding. I think you also have the initial shock of having a newborn and not much sleep! If you can make it to six weeks, things really do improve.
I have a two week old DC2 now and it's so much easier second time round as I know what to expect. I do miss being able to spend all day feeding while watching Netflix, but now also have a toddler to manage. Enjoy sitting on the sofa all day, being brought snacks and drink.
One thing I found incredibly difficult was when we chose to stop breastfeeding. I plan on breastfeeding until DD is six months for various reasons, but not looking forward to giving up as she's our last and it's a really emotional decision even though I felt ready to stop when I did.

Its hard, really hard. And I think bf rates in the UK are so low due to the unrealistic expectations women are given about it. You really do have to take it 1 hour at a time the first 6-8 weeks because it's relentless. They feed a LOT. Sometimes 15-20 times a day depending on leaps and growth spurts. You need a lot of support from family and support groups if possible.

Having said this I would do it again in a heartbeat and will (all being well) next time. Ive just stopped feeding my DS at 28 months and I'm so proud of that achievement and no one can tell me otherwise.

My top tips are:
Research
Join online support groups
Have a supportive network, one of my now best friends and I both bf at the same time and she genuinely got me through the toughest times.
Sleep when baby sleeps
Co sleep if you are happy with it and feed laying on your side so you can both get some rest
Build up a little freezer stash if your are able to pump for someone else to feed baby occasionally.
Introduce a bottle early, this is not without risk (mastitis/bottle preference) but the occasional bottle did no harm for us.

Good luck

Oh and nipple shields were my best friend in the beginning, we weaned off them around 3 weeks

It doesn't have to be hard OP. Some people find it hard but many don't so don't be scared off by horror stories.