Any other women grossed out by breastfeeding?

[Nonameslefttochose]

As in subject, I’m wondering if any other women are absolutely grossed out by breastfeeding? I’m very maternal, I love children (mine and everyone else’s!) I value children and family as the most important “things” in life. Yet the idea of breastfeeding makes me cringe. A baby sucking on a breast like some kind of animal :) despite of this I did try with my first son and lasted 4 days. My second baby is due next week and I’m going to try again even for the first few days as of course I know it’s so beneficial etc. I’m just wondering if anyone else out there have similar feelings with regards to BF?

It's not my business what any one person chooses to do with their body, no. I'm not sure how my having an opinion on the sexualisation of breasts and the relation to BFing equates to telling anybody what to do with their body though.

However as a woman it is absolutely my business to have an opinion on how our bodies are viewed by society and how we internalise that and view our own bodies.

If my opinion causes anybody to not want to BF then I'm afraid that's 100% on them. Personally I make my parenting decisions based upon what I believe is best for me and my child, not because I don't agree with a random on the internet.

Your breasts have been appropriated by the patriarchy for the use and enjoyment of men

Lesbians derive sexual pleasure from breasts too

@lawofdistraction

It's not my business what any one person chooses to do with their body, no. I'm not sure how my having an opinion on the sexualisation of breasts and the relation to BFing equates to telling anybody what to do with their body though.

However as a woman it is absolutely my business to have an opinion on how our bodies are viewed by society and how we internalise that and view our own bodies.

If my opinion causes anybody to not want to BF then I'm afraid that's 100% on them. Personally I make my parenting decisions based upon what I believe is best for me and my child, not because I don't agree with a random on the internet.

No, I'm not saying your opinion will cause people not to breastfeed, your aggressive attitude will ensure that people who wanted to work through these issues, probably won't.

However as a woman it is absolutely my business to have an opinion on how our bodies are viewed by society and how we internalise that and view our own bodies

No, not we, you. Our bodies have nothing to do with you.

I'm not allowed an opinion on how women's bodies are viewed? Why on earth not?

@lawofdistraction

I'm not allowed an opinion on how women's bodies are viewed? Why on earth not?

You're not allowed an opinion on other people's bodies and how they use them, no. It's literally none of your business.

Until pregnancy and childbirth women aren't used to their bodies producing this extra substance or to having it pumped or sucked of them. It's a whole new experience. It might be 'natural' but it's new. And some women might not like this new sensation that they've never been used to before. It's not the same as breathing or eating or walking because we've been doing those things since infancy.

I find it so sad that women have to beat down others who don't share the same opinion on parenting. I'm sorry but you are not a superior person because you breast fed, you're just not.

I'm pregnant. I hope to try to breast feed my baby. If I can't or if I don't like it I will stop without hesitation and that's nobody's business but my own. We are all entitled to our choices, why do people have to argue that theirs are better?

Yes! I'm almost 19 weeks pregnant, and from the minute I found out I new straight away that breast feeding wasn't for me.

I have no problem with other people doing it, but the thought of me doing it is strange!

Can you actually hear yourself? You don't think I can discuss how women's bodies are viewed by society and how that affects BFing?!

The problem isn't people like me, it's people like you who want to shut down all debate and refuse to consider the bigger picture.

@lawofdistraction

Can you actually hear yourself? You don't think I can discuss how women's bodies are viewed by society and how that affects BFing?!

The problem isn't people like me, it's people like you who want to shut down all debate and refuse to consider the bigger picture.

You're not discussing that though, you're telling us whats "wrong" with us, presenting it as fact. You're judging and goading and being horrible.

I'm not shutting down any debate, I'm asking you to think about the affect your comments will be having on new mothers.

I can see the bigger picture, but bigger pictures don't change instantly and nor do they change because you belittle people on the internet.

You don't know what effect my comments are having on new mothers. There could be women reading this thread who are struggling with BFing and think yeah actually, I will keep going, I agree with her, this is what my breasts were designed for and I want to use them. Personally I really struggled for the first 3 weeks with DD not latching and almost stopped, anything that spurred me on would have helped.

As I commented yesterday, I felt very much with BFing that it was 2 fingers up at the patriarchy and every man who had ever stared at my chest. I do think it's a feminist issue and I refuse to be told I can't discuss it as such on a thread about feeling BFing is unpleasant.

@lawofdistraction

You don't know what effect my comments are having on new mothers. There could be women reading this thread who are struggling with BFing and think yeah actually, I will keep going, I agree with her, this is what my breasts were designed for and I want to use them. Personally I really struggled for the first 3 weeks with DD not latching and almost stopped, anything that spurred me on would have helped.

As I commented yesterday, I felt very much with BFing that it was 2 fingers up at the patriarchy and every man who had ever stared at my chest. I do think it's a feminist issue and I refuse to be told I can't discuss it as such on a thread about feeling BFing is unpleasant.

Yeah somehow I doubt that. Your comments have been horrible. If anyone has been unpleasant here, it is you.

In fairness, a thread with a title about how gross BF is does have implications for all mothers, BF and non-BF. I was able to let the disgust of my family members - if anything I was mildly contemptuous of them - but that mightn’t be the case for everyone and I have to say on (luckily only really twice was it obvious) occasions I did get looks of disgust when BF, it wasn’t particularly pleasant. There is absolutely no logical reason for someone to object to someone BF, it must come from prudishness or disgust, so it is worth interrogating where that feeling of grossness comes from. It can impact on us all.

Let the disgust of my family members wash over me is what I meant to say…

@Puppalicious I honestly don't believe anyone should be looked at in disgust while breastfeeding. Especially by your own family, that's terrible. It's a perfectly natural, normal thing to do.

But at the same time I don't understand this shove it down your throat mentality either. There is massive judgement on both sides and it's equally wrong. I think what the op meant was that she personally finds the feeling of breastfeeding gross. She's had a load of sarcastic remarks and insults for saying it but it's just her experience, her feelings and her choice.

I think one of the best thing women could do is stop judging each other's choices. Stop trying to prove why your way is better. Just turn a blind eye, focus on your own life and don't mind how other people choose to parent.

Yes, I was entirely grossed out by the idea of it. I realise that it is best for the baby and had I been able to I would have done it but yes the idea made me feel ill.

[quote gailplattshairbrush]@Puppalicious I honestly don't believe anyone should be looked at in disgust while breastfeeding. Especially by your own family, that's terrible. It's a perfectly natural, normal thing to do.

But at the same time I don't understand this shove it down your throat mentality either. There is massive judgement on both sides and it's equally wrong. I think what the op meant was that she personally finds the feeling of breastfeeding gross. She's had a load of sarcastic remarks and insults for saying it but it's just her experience, her feelings and her choice.

I think one of the best thing women could do is stop judging each other's choices. Stop trying to prove why your way is better. Just turn a blind eye, focus on your own life and don't mind how other people choose to parent. [/quote]
Having an opinion on the bigger issue doesn't automatically equate to judging other individual women's choices. For example my neighbour has a newborn and I have no idea how she's feeding him and I couldn't care less either way. It doesn't impact upon me.
I do however care about society's attitude towards BFing as a whole because I think women as a whole are being let down. Most women in the UK do want to BF and start off doing so (the stats a few years ago were 80%, not sure now) but that number very quickly drops off. It's become a big vicious cycle as the less women who BF, the less visibility and knowledge and support there is. Choices aren't made in a vacuum.

@lawofdistraction agreed but there is a difference between offering support and advice and insulting a woman who chooses not to do the things that you do. This post is a prime example. Op has been called immature, bizarre and had lots of horrible comments purely for stating her personal feelings. It's not the same as saying bfing is gross, it's saying it felt gross for her.

There will always be prudish people in society who believe breastfeeding should be kept behind closed doors, the same as many other social issues. Adequate support and advice should be available for women who want to breastfeed but that doesn't extend to calling out women who choose not to and telling them they're wrong.

That's not what she said though in the OP, that it felt gross for her. She said "a baby sucking on a breast like some kind of animal" which comes across like a strange generalised attitude towards BFing rather than a personal experience. Note not her baby or breast, but a baby, a breast. I think it was an extremely goady post if not outright trolling, so I'm not surprised by the replies she got.

I think exactly like you ...so ani,mal like ..it disgusts me

Breasts ARE part of sex. They're part of the sexual experience and sexual attraction. They're not just for breastfeeding at all.

Breasts are a natural part of sex. The patriarchy can think what it likes, but I'm happy to let them think it's just them that gets pleasure from it. I'd rather use my boobs as part of some good lovin than be at the mercy of a tiny and very needy human sucking away at me like I'm a farm animal. Tbh, I'd rather not see BF flaunted in public ( under a cover is ok, but not the militant let it all hang out anywhere squad.) I don't want to see it anymore than I'd want to see other 'natural' things, like doing a poo, shoved in my face.

BREASTS ARE ALSO PART OF SEX. Over the course of most women's lives, they're probably involved much more in sex than in BF.

Comparing breast feeding with defecation is perverse and misogynistic. Trying to normalise this reaction is abusive towards other women.