Could I have given her listeria?

[RunnerBeanz]

New to mumsnet and have no kids so apologies if this is the wrong place to post but, I had a pregnant friend over to my garden for lunch today, and I served her halloumi and avocado on toast.

She is adamant that I have given her listeria, because the avocado had black/ brown spots and lines in it (she found out because my husband came out to join us and cut his avocado outside, and it was also like this). We've always still eaten our avocadoes like this and just cut off anything really brown - we just assumed they were 'over-ripe' / 'bruised', equivalent to bananas, as we thought they still tasted okay. But apparently this is a sign of rot/ mould and means that the avocado is much more likely to be infected by listeria?

She'd already eaten her lunch but immediately drove off home and has sent me a number of angry messages since, that I've found really upsetting. She's since been crying to one of our other friends. Obviously I didn't intend to cause her any harm and would feel terrible if I really have increased hers and baby's risk.

Is she being hormonal or is there actually a risk here? I've googled and not really found anything (apart from listeria sometimes being present on the skin - but I washed it first!) so I'm turning to those of you who are also pregnant to help me out!

There was an avocado/listeria recall in the US a couple of years ago because they thought the skins might be contaminated and if unwashed there was a tiny chance of contaminating the flesh when cutting them up.
But not because they were a bit bruised!

@nitsandwormsdodger

Offer to call an ambulance

😁

Obviously don't, but still... Don't make her lunch again - you now have a perfect excuse "don't want to risk giving you listeria again" 😂

Your 'friend' is a liar an arse.

She thinks that because they were "mouldy or rotten" (still can't decide if they were, versus overripe!) that means the listeria on the skin is more likely to have got into the flesh. But yes, definitely not cooking for her again!

Tell her if she is so convinced that she has been exposed to listeria then she had best get down to a n e . An evening of sitting around might help her calm down 🙄🙄🙄

I think they can test for listeria with a blood test so if she's really concerned she should ask to be tested. Listeria is rare.

I can understand your friend being worried if she is anxious in pregnancy but I haven't heard of this being an issue and it's wrong of her to send you rude text messages.

Also if she is that anxious then maybe she should stay at home where she can prepare her own food.

I'm currently pregnant and willingly served myself a slightly overripe avocado for lunch today without concern.

Things that occur to me:

1. Delicious! I'm going to have to try an avocado and halloumi salad soon.
2. Your friend didn't have to eat it, you didn't force her.
3. Her mental health may be suffering, she sounds very anxious.
4. If she's not displaying symptoms, how does she know she's got listeria? You'd also need a test to be certain! If listeria was that common, nobody would eat pate because it might make you unwell.
5. I really wouldn't be worrying in your shoes.

I would not even want to see her again she sounds unhinged sorry!

Avocados were my main craving when I was pregnant with my first baby. I ate one a day, many of them bruised/ overripe! Never even occurred to me. I think she has massively overreacted and I would ignore at this point. Even if there was a risk (which I don't think there is) it was served without the intention of poisoning her, so multiple angry messages totally uncalled for.

Sounds like she's struggling, needs to speak to her midwife about her anxiety. You did nothing wrong. Probably want to give her some space until she realises that she's been a bit bonkers.

She is being horrible to you. How rude after you made her lunch. I would ignore her. The risk if listeria is tiny and the NHS only advise washing vegetables and that is for everyone not just pregnant women. If she is this neurotic about eating food perhaps she should just only eat food she's made herself and not accept offers of hospitality for now. I would certainly never make her food again!

Ok I’m getting pulled in by this thread! I just checked multiple websites and they ALL said that if the brown bits are in small isolated spots that is NOT an indication of it being overripe/ mouldy, only if it’s brown in large patches. So I definitely think you’re absolutely fine xx

She sounds like a complete nut job. I wouldn't worry about making it to the end of her pregnancy as friends.

I’m a midwife. Never heard of listeria in avocado. I eat brown avocado all the time, it’s just oxidised a bit, not rotten.

If she's this over dramatic now, imagine what she'll be like in the third trimester!

Is she actually unwell, or did she just come to your house, willingly eat the lunch then decide on the way home you've given her listeria

Is she even unwell? Sounds like a total hypochondriac and an overall boot, I wouldn't want to be friends with her.

Don't apologise.

Listeria is something you cannot see, smell or taste so no 'black bits on an avocado' is not listeria

You don't eat the skin, and you washed it anyway. You haven't given her listeria. Why did she eat it if she suspected it was crawling with bacteria?!

Nah, she's being an arse. I would tell her to stop the angry texts

Here are two facts:

I grew up on an avocado farm.

This woman is a nutter and hypochondriac.

Get smarter friends.

1. If she was worried about listeria, she shouldn't have eaten the avocado.
2. If she was worried about brown bits, she shouldn't have eaten the avocado.
3. Avocado is not on the NHS listeria warning list, let alone 'brown bits' on avocado.
4. Acting like that when someone's just given you lunch, with repeated angry messages, is insanely rude. I wouldn't talk to her again, definitely not until she calms down and apologises.

Sounds like she willingly shoved the food in her face then later decided to be mean and nasty. Surely that's on her not you?

Brown avos aren't the tastiest but not going to kill you or give you listeria. I've honestly not even heard of someone getting listeria pregnant or otherwise in my many years of living or whilst practising medicine. I remember an unwashed beansprout recall a couple of years back and a cheese recall more recently in a mould ripened cheese (that you can't eat in pregnancy uncooked) anyway. It is quite rare and avoided by sensible food choices, emphasis on sensible.

She sounds unhinged and someone I would steer clear from, especially when it comes to being responsible for food. Pregnancy is a long time and some women just get crazy and weird and hormonal and more weird.

At any rate instead of berating you and your kindness, if she really believed she had a pretty awful infection that could risk the life of her unborn, she could spend a nice evening/night/morning in a NHS A&E waiting room? Surely that would appease things for Her? (I really don't condone this in all honesty- she needs to get a grip)

Grouch Disclaimer: running on 3hrs sleep. Bloody avocados....

Yeh she's totally nuts. Tell her to call her midwife and she can speak with her about the risks or check the NHS website. Is she always this high maintenance? I'm too old for friends like that in my life to be honest!

Googling the reddit thread you were talking about I wouldn't eat an avocado like that but your friend sounds insane, she would have seen it herself before choosing to eat it. It doesn't even sound like she is unwell so god knows why she is freaking out and claiming to have listeria.

You have definitely not exposed her to listeria. Bruised avocados are fine, I ate hundreds in my pregnancy.

She’s probably feeling very vulnerable and had lashed out, but that’s not acceptable and she’s wrong to be blaming you like this. You haven’t done anything wrong and she should apologise for being so rude and unpleasant about it.