Pregnant with a toddler support thread

[BertieBotts]

Anyone interested in a support thread?

I'm due in August with DC3 but have a huge gap between DS1 & 2 so I've never been through this bit with a toddler around before :)

DS2 will be 3 when the new baby arrives.

Would be fun to share tips and things.

Also is anyone else still breastfeeding their toddler through pregnancy?

@CaptainSpirit DS will be 22m so I will have 2 in nappies too. I mean if he's miraculously ready, brilliant but my earliest was completely dry and done by 27m and my latest was 3yrs 1m. So I'm not expecting him to be near.

Oh god the nappies 🤢🤢🤢 DS is in cloth nappies but for the first trimester I used disposable because I felt so so sick and scraping toddler poo was too much!!

This thread will be a godsend what a great idea, DC1 will be 15m when DC2 arrives in September. He’s already a whirlwind crawling about the house causing havoc, I am jealous of my last pregnant self that was able to sloth about and wallow under the duvet some days 😂

Any tips from you 2+ mums on here? Can I prep anything to make the transition easier? We’re getting DC 1 in his cot next week we’re both on AL so we can be tired as hell and not have to do much.

Choc I'm still feeding DS2 to sleep as well. I'm not worried about it - I'm sure DH can hold the baby while I do bedtime if he still wants to then!

I did read in Sarah Ockwell-Smith's book about alternating bedtimes with each parent, so that your toddler gets used to you not always being there and newborn gets both of you from the start but I'm not sure how it would work for r us currently. I might just wing it and see what happens!

Hiya can I join! Have 10 month old and just found out we are pregnant, no idea how far so will find out at the scan! Bit nervous of feeling like I did in the last pregnancy with my crazy baby 🤣
Any one know of any good joint buggies? I love walking so will definitely need to sort this in a few months xx

@dawnk77 congratulations!!

My favourite is a baby jogger city mini or GT double. I had one with my 17m gap and loved it. I'm on the hunt for another second hand for these two. I don't think I can justify a new one as the gap is 22m this time and DS is a good walker, but I do have dogs and I find a good double easier than single plus a sling or buggy board or walker.

Other ones I'm looking out for are mountain buggy and out and about, but u do have my heart set on a babyjogger as they're brilliant.

I might try the vicks suggestions re nappies, then get covid as a back up if that doesn’t work

I have a 16m/o dd and pregnant 33+5 with second child. I’m exhaustedddd! Chasing after a toddler and dealing with her tantrums is so tiring 😩
Starting to get back pains, can barely get up from laying down without it hurting too. Hope everyone is well!

@burningbenches thank you I'll have a look at these! Xx

Hi all!
Great thread. @AyyX I’m also 32 weeks pregnant and have a 15 month old! Struggling big time with work FT, exhaustion, PGP and the needs of a newly walking, very active and wanting to play baby/toddler. Physio telling me not to lift her, but, there is no alternative (can’t leave her on the ground if she falls!).
@DawnK77 Im usually a big walker, city based but love being “off path” so have gotten a second hand OutNAbout 360 double with the carrycot for the newborn.
Any other reccmendations from small age gap mums? Any of you need CSections for baba 2? Any survival tips? (First was 3 days labour, EMCS. Was hoping for VBAC but baba is currently transverse!). Concerned re changing nappies, lifting the 16 month old etc.

@MissingCoffeeandWine I had a c section flr first and really hoping for a VBAC due to those reasons I don't know how I would cope not lifting lo or driving for weeks x

Has anyone tried the bugaboo donkey double buggy?

I'm having a planned c section this time x

@MissingCoffeeandWine omg mine is the same, VERY active!!!! Doesn’t stop moving
She’s at the terrible twos stage where she throws tantrums, screams and cries when she doesn’t get her way! Very impatient too. Her tantrums and cries are driving me up the wall 😩 I just wanna pull my hair out.

Is anyone dreading the poo explosions coming when newborns get here?? I was so glad it was over with dc1 now I’ll have to do that all over again 😣

Bugger just wrote a whole list of tips (from my rose tinted glasses of 10yrs ago) @missingcoffeeandwine. I had 17m between my 2nd and 3rd and I'll have 22m gap this time.

Routine. I am not a routine person but I had an older school aged child which forced a get up routine and this time I have 2. So I would do school run, toddler group (please reopen) lunch, dog walk to get dc2 to nap, play, school run, tea, bed. Being out a lot really helped.

Double buggy was essential for me as I liked to try and get double nap and then have time for me. I was "selfish" in that if I miraculously got a double nap out of them I would use the time to eat, have a nap, crazily I used to do an exercise video etc. I might put a wash on or the DW but I mainly did what I wanted. Let's face it if i tidied up at lunch then by bedtime it would be a mess again.

Low standards and big washing machine. See above.

Some councils you can get a second bin if you have 2 in nappies. I use cloth now any way but was useful then.

Divide and conquer at bedtime if both parents are home. Not always possible and I often did both by myself but if two can it's better.

I made my living room as child safe as possible as dc2 was a live wire and climbed everything. Dc4 is the same.. I had a travel cot set up so I could pop one of them in so I could wee etc.

I used a sling at groups, and also round the house.

But it's all a bit of a blur and it was 10yrs ago 😂 so I could be making it up!

@brushlaptop I have a bugaboo donkey duo for my twins - it's absolutely amazing and I love it. I've got a buggy board in it now ready for when no. 3 arrives 😊

@SamoyedFan123 amazing thank you! Thinking of getting it for when baby 2 arrives :)

I’m 38 weeks today and have a 2 year old. I’m so tired😫

Hey @BertieBotts
I'm almost 23w, due end of July and have. DD who turned 3 this week. Still BFing her although she only really feeds on wake up and at bedtime and not for long.

Will read the whole thread later but wanted to comment do I didn't lose it as I'm sure it will be helpful to chat to others in the same situation x

So who else got screwed by the time change today?

I am on a mission to keep DS2 in his bed (or at least his room) if he wakes up at night, but struggling with the feeling of BF if he's not immediately going to sleep. Cuddles sometimes work but not if he's too awake, so I piled into the mid-sleeper in his room with him. Ugh it's horrible!! The mattress is so ridiculously hard and there is no space to spread out. I snuck out when he was asleep and blocked the gap at the ladder with books.

But - it did work! And of course his gro clock hadn't adjusted to the time change (didn't think to change it last night) so he woke up and I could hear him talking to himself "When clock orange, say Mummy, Daddy, Time to wake up! When clock blue just wait for clock orange." (Repeated a couple of times) "Open curtains, all light outside! Careful on the steps. A bus! No people getting on bus today." (He can sit at the top of the ladder and watch the bus stop, which he loves, buses are his favourite thing).

I went in because I didn't want to leave him free roaming without supervision and he told me off because the clock was still blue and it wasn't morning time yet :o

@BertieBotts promise I'm not stalking you! 😂
I relied on not changing the groclock this morning. It almost worked except he needed the potty. Anyway, we're still snuggled up together in my bed as I've given him DHs iPad with Playtime Island on it. Infinitely preferable to getting up and watching Bing.
I was however screwed by DH getting up and starting work. The tractor outside is so loud 😭 x

Ugh slightly jealous! No such luck in our house. Wakes have been sneaking earlier and earlier for the last few weeks. Mines never been a big sleeper but had been getting 9pm-8am (with night wake). Now back to 8:30/9pm-6:30/7. And everything she can find thrown out of her cot until we come in 😂

What age can grow clocks start being used at?

So thanks all for the tips! I second being about to get out. Keeping everything crossed I don’t have to do a second maternity leave in lockdown! (Last time I coped by going back to work early 😆 not quite the baby groups I was hoping for 😳)

Also apologies so =ps, and “about to get out” was meant to read “able to get out”

*lesson on how not to type with a toddler trying to grab the phone!

Time change worked ok for us I think🤞🏼, now he gets up at a reasonable 7am instead of 6am🙊 it does mean him staying up until 8:30 tonight though.

We had a crying session around the time the clocks changed so were awake half the night it means she’s still asleep now though, while I’m got a thumping headache