Advice needed

[Holly91]

Hi everybody, 1st time post so don’t know if I’m doing this right, I found out I was pregnant just over a week ago, I have pcos so very irregular periods and with everything that been gong on with the lockdowns keeping track of my periods were the last thing on my mind... this leads me to not knowing how many weeks pregnant I am, and I am thinking anywhere between 7-13 weeks, I do have a long term partner but this pregnancy was in no way planned, I contacted my GP once I’d gotten my head round the 2 lines on the test, I was only offered a telephone appointment and to be honest the GP wasn’t helpful at all, I told her all of the above plus the fact that I wasn’t sure on what I wanted to do, o was really hoping for a scan to at least find out how many weeks I am to actually think about my options, she very abruptly told me as I wasnt bleeding she wouldn’t be referring me for a scan and that I would have to fill a booking appointment for the midwife and wait for them to contact me about a dating scan. Thing is the midwife is only there once a week which was today and I’ve not heard a thing? I filled the form out in the doctors carpark and took it straight back in last week, I think it’s rather strange that I’ve had to fill out a form to see the midwife before I’ve even had anybody speak through my options, is there anybody else I can contact to try and get a scan booked? I’ve looked into private scans but with my business not allowed to reopen for a couple of weeks it’s money I do t really have spare, if anyone can share any advice I’d much appreciate it I thought about ringing the maternity unit at the closest hospital but I already felt stupid after coming g off the phone to the GP for some reason, tia x

I'm so sorry your gp wasn't very helpful, maybe you could ring the hospital that you would like ur care at. If you ring the switch board they would be able to direct you to the midwifes, who then hopefully would be more helpful and arrange a scan for u

You just need to wait for your appointment to come through. When they see the date of your last period they will work out how far gone you are from that and make sure they book you in for a scan at 12 weeks. What sort of options do you want to talk about? If termination is something you are considering you need to contact the clinic who will do a scan and tell you how far gone you are. But only if you’re actually booked in for a termination I believe, they won’t just do one at a consultation

I would contact BPAS. I think they're thought of as an abortion clinic but they offer scans and taking through options and I think even sessions with counsellors. They've been very helpful in my limited experience so definitely worth a look. Good luck xxx

@boymum88 Thankyou so much for the quick response, I think that may be what I’ll have to do as my anxiety Is through the roof x

@J333gr I don’t know the date of my last period that is the problem, and I am very u sure on what I want to do, and was hoping a scan would help me decide, I had a bad experience with a termination when I was a teenager but now at nearly 30 I don’t live with rose tinted specs on and a know a baby is a life changing decision one minute I’m happy about being pregnant the next I’m really not , I feel awful for feeling this way when there’s so many that would love to be pregnant x

@Allicit I didn’t think about contacting BPAS as yes I did link them straight to terminations, I’ll have a look Thankyou x

When I fell pregnant with my 2nd my periods were all over the place, I just guessed basically. Can you go somewhere in the middle and assume you are 10/11 weeks so calculate your last period from that?
You can’t help the way you’re feeling try not to worry about other people. Have a look into Marie stopes they offer counselling and would be able to help you. Although I’m not sure how efficient they are during Covid times!

Sorry your gp wasn't helpful! Have you tried your local sexual health clinic? I know my local one has a "pregnancy advisory service" who will go through options, find out how far gone you are etc. X

I'm sorry your GP wasn't more helpful! They should have at least talked you though options.

Saying that the NHS won't do a scan early unless there's a medical reason for it. So even if she had referred you to the early pregnancy unit there's a chance they would of rejected it anyway. They may take the referral as your 7 weeks as that's the least, or they will do an average and do a scan at 12 weeks based on that, unless the midwife at the booking in appt wants it bringing forward for a medical reason.

Could you get a clear blue test and do one of those? They give you an idea of how many weeks you are.

I'd call the midwifery team at the hospital. If you could be as far gone as 13 weeks they'll want you in for your booking appointment asap. There are a couple of tests they do that need to be done in a certain timeframe.

GPs generally aren't able to help as midwives seem to be gatekeepers for a lot of the tests/scans etc. They are probably only allowed to refer for scans for heavy bleeding/other medical issues etc.

Your midwife will also be able to listen to your concerns about carrying on with the pregnancy and should be able to let you know the local pathways (although really you GP should've known this).

Yes, if your local midwife hasn't contacted you I'd call the midwifery team at the hospital. Tell them you could be up to 13 weeks pregnant, but so far haven't heard anything about a scan. That might get them shifting!

Other suggestions like BPAS and sexual health clinic seem good if you want to talk through your options. Depends if these clinics are local to you though?

PP mentioned the clear blue tests, but I don't think this will work for you. These tests only estimate the date up to 5 weeks, so you'll just get told 5 weeks.

Thankyou for everybodys advice it’s much appreciated, I managed to get through to my doctors and the receptionist was really helpful, went and spoke to the midwife whilst I was on the phone and managed to book my booking appointment for next week, although it will be on the phone, and still further away than I’d like but I do understand they are busy I just don’t have patience 🤦🏻‍♀️