Pregnant after miscarriage - due summer

[notalwaysalondoner]

Hi all,

I wanted to start a thread for those of us due June/July/August who have experienced one or more losses. I think for us our pregnancy experience is a bit different to those who have never had a loss, particularly when we get nervous about getting excited.

I’m 8+3 and due 26 July. I had an anembryonic pregnancy found at 9 weeks in May, which I had surgical management for. I then had a very early miscarriage at 4+5 in September. We’ve had a private scan at 7 weeks where we saw the heartbeat and our little prawn seemed fine, which was such a relief after the horror of the scans where I just had a big blank space in my anembryonic pregnancy. I have another scan booked for Saturday after which I think I’ll tell my parents and in laws as they’ll notice me not drinking at Christmas anyway!

Be great to hear your stories and support each other at this time!

Hi @notalwaysalondoner I’m sure I recognise your name & am so sorry for your losses. I’ve had 3 recurrent miscarriages this year and am currently 7w5d. My first was a MMC at 7w4d but we found out at 9. The second was a chemical pregnancy and my 3rd was another MMC the heartbeat stopped and we found out by chance at a private scan a few days later. I’m around the time I’ve previously miscarried so am really really worried.I had a private scan when I was 6 days and they said there was a strong heartbeat but it hasn’t stopped me worrying. I’ve got a private scan on Monday when I should be 8w2d so praying our baby is okay! How are you dealing with the anxiety? Xxx

@notalwaysalondoner I totally agree that being pregnant after loss often means we feel nervous more than excited most of the time. It doesn't help having very mild symptoms either, and honestly those who like to tell us "you're so lucky not having symptoms" drives me crazy -- I don't consider myself lucky, I'd rather have solid symptoms that reassure me everything is as it should be. I've given up commenting on those threads because people always take it to the extreme and compare non-symptoms with those hospitalised with morning sickness 🙄

I'm currently 17+2 and have been anxious more than excited. I'm excited of course, but if I didn't know I was pregnant I would have no idea. I thought after the 12-week scan I've relax into a bit, but instead I find myself just waiting until the next scan, worrying if everything is ok in there. I had early reassurance scans at 6+1 and 8+2, which definitely helped, but as the weeks go by I can't shake the feeling something will go wrong again. No-one really prepares you for that.

I hope all goes well with you and your pregnancy this time. Know that everything you're feeling is normal for people in our position, so go easy on yourself.

Hi @notalwaysalondoner @Sallyjo27 and @jazzibelle.

Thanks for posting and I’m also sorry for hear of your losses.

It does make you feel a bit more normal hearing others stories because like you I’m also anxious because of a previous loss.

I had a CP early October (5 weeks) but even though early was still a big blow. We were lucky enough to conceive almost straight away afterwards and here I am now 9 weeks today. I had a viability scan last Saturday that showed a healthy baby and heart beat however since then I’ve had brown discharge and last night the smallest bit of blood when I wiped (no more blood today but a little brown discharge still)

It takes me straight back to when I had the loss and you fear the worst as you all are which is reassuring to know I’m not alone in worrying. We have a scan booked tomorrow again because EPU won’t see me. Fingers crossed it’s good news.

I hope we can all support each other through what should be an exciting time but also an anxious one xx

@DMT1982 the brown blood can be alarming, but it's old blood and totally fine. I've had that after every internal scan, I guess the probe irritates the cervix a bit. Best of luck with your pregnancy, keeping everything crossed for you!

I'm due 16th June with second baby, but I've had 2 mcs in the past first at 6 weeks, had my son fine, but then had another mc at 8+1, I'm now 14+1 but still worry daily, I can't get excited as much as I'd love too just incase, had a scan at 8+6, then a private one at 12 weeks and have a very active baby, but still think has something gone wrong? I've booked in for a private scan on the 3rd of jan to find out the sex, but more so to hope everything is still okay, hopefully at the next scan I'll be 16+3 I can relax a little, hope all you ladies are okay, I know where your coming from with worry, sorry also for everyone's losses, let's hope we all have lovely little babys in june/july/August x

Thank you for making this thread.

I had a miscarriage at 8 weeks in September, the scan showed no growth after 5w6d..we had been TTC for 10 months...amazingly I fell pregnant only a few weeks later.

I’m now 7 weeks and so scared I’ve already lost it. Googling everything.

I would like an early scan but I’m almost too scared..I also don’t want to go back to the previous place I had a scan so don’t know where I would go now...

The early scan definitely reassured me a lot, being able to see it and the heartbeat definitely highlights that at least in that moment all is well. Looking forward nervously to my next one on Saturday!

I keep hearing horror stories though of people who have had 8 miscarriages in a row and then a late loss so that scares me too. I can’t imagine getting to like 25 or 35 weeks then having a loss...

I do have some symptoms this time compared to the missed miscarriage. Last time I only had really sore boobs, this time I’ve had some mild nausea every day as well as really sore boobs and fatigue. So hopefully that means something.

Hi everyone.

I’m due 9th June - this is baby no. 4 for me! I have a 2.5 yr old and since having her I’ve had 3 miscarriages (I had 4 before I got pregnant with her so 7 in total!) I had one around 7 wks. Then a MMC picked up at our booking scan and then another at 10.5 wks but I’d been for a scan at 8 wks and knew the baby wasn’t developing properly.

This pregnancy had been so hard. We’ve had 3 scans and I now have a proper bump but husband still won’t really talk about it and still doesn’t want us to tell people. I’m under the care of the recurrent miscarriage team and they are scanning me again tomorrow (15wks) I’m really hoping that things are okay and that maybe we can begin to feel a bit excited. This is definitely my last pregnancy whatever the outcome and I’d love to enjoy it.

Wishing you all a happy healthy 9 months

I'd like to join please. I don't have much to say atm except I have my 12 week scan tomorrow after a recent miscarriage and am a bit too petrified to talk until then! But I look forward to supporting each other.

Hi, thanks for starting this thread and I’m sorry to hear of your losses. I am still quite early on, not due until August, and I think pregnancy after loss is definitely going to be a tough journey! I lost my first baby at 20 weeks in June, I don’t think I will ever get to a point in this pregnancy where I will really be able to relax but I really need to try not to worry too much. I spoke to my bereavement midwife today and she has arranged an early scan, if all is well at the early scan I will be prescribed aspirin and daily heparin injections, then all being well at 12 weeks I will get a referral to fetal medicine. Hopefully I will be looked after but the anxiety is not easy at all, and I don’t think others who haven’t experienced loss always understand.

@jazzibelle thanks for your reply. I have also had some red blood as well so will see tomorrow what’s going on, fingers crossed all ok but I’m realistic it may not be good news xx

I'm so glad I noticed this thread.

I just got a BFP today after a miscarriage at 8 weeks in October. I'm still very early on but wanted to try and find support straight away.

Here's my little story summary: At 7 weeks I started bleeding quite heavy and paid for a last-minute private scan. They told me to phone the early pregnancy unit to make an appointment. I didn't realise they cant announce a miscarriage until they scan a week apart to double-check. They confirmed at the NHS hospital that I did miscarry. There was still some tissue stuck so I was bleeding for about 3 and a half weeks.

We didn't expect to conceive so quickly but we are delighted. Just going to have to miss out on the Christmas cocktails and cheese boards this year.. hahah.

I am certainly more nervous this time and feel like I'm not really planning too far ahead whereas last time I was so excited and making wishlists for everything.

@Moo678 sorry to hear about all your losses, fingers crossed this one is as smooth as possible. I’m not planning to tell anyone until 15 weeks either except parents and parents in law as they’ll notice I’m not drinking over Christmas. But I know a couple of people who told everyone after the 12 week scan then lost the baby a week or two later.

@Opticabbage let us know how it went!

@notinthestarsigns that must have been so tough, I was saying earlier a later loss must make it even harder to let yourself get excited. Once you read up on miscarriage it sometimes makes me amazed any pregnancies make it to healthy live births at all... it seems like there are so many hurdles.

@MumToBeMaz congratulations and happy you conceived so quickly! After our second miscarriage I conceived again on the second month.

All, when would your due dates be?

Got my scan tomorrow afternoon. Probably going to have to tell my mum before then as I’m seeing her this evening and I’d like to tell her in person, won’t see her again until after Christmas.

Scan went well-ish, thank you @notalwaysalondoner. Baby was alive and well thank goodness. However they couldn't do the screening as baby was in an awkward position. I'm 13 weeks so I think I'll miss out on the screening now.

I hope yours goes well tomorrow!

Good news about the scan @Opticabbage! And good luck for yours @notalwaysalondoner. X

I am still very early, my due date is 28th Aug.
Called the EPU on Friday and they have told me to call back in 2 weeks and then they will get an appointment sorted for me to go in for an early scan and check everything out at 8 weeks.

It's a lot scarier this time. Feel like I'm checking myself every couple of hours. How do you all deal with the anxiety?

Sorry to hear everyone loss.. I had one loss so can feel you, I am 12 weeks now but having sharp back and pelvic pain time and again which makes me more worried. Is anyone experiencing this..would be relief to know

I am not due in July/August but I can definitely relate to this.

I've had 2 miscarriages, one was with my POS ex boyfriend (which I told myself was a blessing in disguise, I would not want to be attached to him for the rest of my life, but it still was not easy) and then my husband and I miscarried last year. I am currently on my third pregnancy and am now 28 weeks to the day, pregnant and our little boy is very healthy so far and growing as planned.

I understand the fear and apprehension. The first few months after finding out was ROUGH, I was super emotional and I give credit to my husband for sticking by me. I was terrified of losing this baby, and I would go from being happy to sad, to anger, to happy and it was a roller coaster. After every ultrasound I would cry because my husband was so happy and I felt like he didn't understand how scared I was. We didn't even tell out families until I was in the 14th week. But now that we are where we are I feel like I have transitioned into a, maybe this pregnancy will be okay and my baby will be fine after all! Even when we go into our appointments, I am always nervous because I am worried something will be wrong. I am now learning that not every appointment has an ultrasound, which has taken some getting used to. I really like the reassurance of seeing my baby and making sure he's still bouncing around in there, and I am grateful that my OB is grateful for that. For some reason I have also been very private about this pregnancy..my family and friends do know, but I'm not updating "baby bump" pics on social media, we are not sharing the names with anyone, we are being very reserved and it has been explained its just me protecting myself considering my past history. I don't people to make a big fuss over me.

I completely understand @Kiyentai. I almost feel guilty for getting pregnant so quickly because I feel like I've not given myself enough time to process the loss from October.

We told our parents just because they would know when we weren't drinking on Christmas day. We have not told anybody else and we don't want to until we are quite far along just incase.

Every little twinge I get I feel like something bad is going to happen. It's so hard to relax.

My scan was ok, baby was in a funny position so we didn’t get a great image and I had to keep peeing then drinking to see if different bladder fullness would make it clearer! We were there about an hour in total! But saw heartbeat and sonographer didn’t seem worried. In hindsight I regret not checking that the ultrasound place did internal scans, as the picture on 7 weeks was much clearer with an internal one than one at 9 weeks that was external. At 7 weeks we could see baby super clearly with a very obvious heartbeat; on Saturday we could only see a blob and only see a heartbeat if we looked really carefully in the exact right place, so I’d definitely recommend an internal scan for those weeks!

I have my first NHS scan on 20th January and luckily DH is supposed to be allowed to join, and my booking appointment on 8th January. I told my mum on Saturday and our in laws (we are already here for Christmas early as we’re staying here while house purchase goes through). They are very happy as they all know about our previous miscarriages and it’s nice to start to feel a bit excited. I’ve actually been much less anxious than I expected although I didn’t allow myself to think about anything baby related until after the first scan which I think helped.

So so glad everything went well for you today op

Glad all went ok @notalwaysalondoner and hope you manage to relax a little over Christmas. X

How are you all doing? Hope everyone’s Christmases aren’t too disrupted with the announcements. Our house exchanged day before yesterday so pleased about that and we should be in by end of first week of January. We’ll be 35 minutes from my parents which will be great with a baby on the way as before we were in London so 2.5+ hours from any family.

My nausea has stopped the last week or so but I’m sleeping loads - at least 10 hours a night. Hope nausea disappearing isn’t anything to be concerned about...

Hey all, I’m feeling so tired now, collapsing at 9pm every night! Had to drag myself round all the shops for hours yesterday as we’re going into tier 4 today and need to buy stuff for our new house - we don’t have any furniture at all, will be interesting having to do it all online!

I keep flipping between being excited and positive and being convinced something will go wrong and that they’ll find a missed miscarriage at the 12 week scan... how were your Christmases? Have you told anyone about the pregnancy yet?

When are you having your scans?