Summer '20 Grads Part IV

[SmileyT]

@Blondi3 💚10th October EDD 25th May
@Mococo1 💚11th October 🧡 12th November EDD 29th March
@littleRa 🧡 14th October EDD 8th March
@Mustbemad82 ❤️ 15th October EDD 20th April
@MrsEmilyB ❤️ 15th October EDD 29th April
@Dipsy77 🧡🧡 26th October EDD 15th March
@smileyT 🧡 26th October EDD 15th March 💙 BOY
@Ltay2 💚9th November 🧡 20th November EDD 10th April
@blodyn91 🧡 20th November EDD 12th April

@cocoblue22 EDD 12th March 💙 BOY
@noble89 EDD 24th March
@mrsmummy1111 EDD 30th March
@zippityzip EDD 31st March 🤍 SURPRISE
@fairylights2 EDD 1st April
@eloise27 EDD 8th April
@samilicious EDD 10th April
@Lettie365 - EDD 11th April
@Madz123 EDD 13th April
@Catherinettc EDD 19th May
@Sophi123 EDD 20th May
@mrsI2020 EDD 22nd May
@Busybee143

💚 extra scans ❤️ 12w scans 🧡 20w scans 💙 Boy 💖Girl 🤍 Surprise

@MrsEmilyB I think before being pregnant some people think a planned C-Sec will be less scary etc as there are more elements of control, but the more you learn the more you realise what a major surgery it is and how extensive the recovery is.

@LittleRa I had a look in Primark the other day and they had lots of newborn stuff, but I resisted the temptation. Going to wait till gender scan. I did buy a pack of braletts which are super comfy though, and good old cotton pants.
Can't wait to start buying the big stuff!

Hey girls how is everyone doing?! Yayy for all the boys . I have two girls from a previous marriage and a DSS so 2 girls and a boy here. Everyone thinks I’d like a boy but if I’m being honest I’d love another wee girl. Dh would love a girl but ofc we both say healthy baby well be lucky to get. In my experience in this house the girls are so much easier!! My dss is a handful !!

Love the new baby stuff. I love unisex stuff personally , I love all the neutrals.

Has anyone thought about breastfeeding? I’ve had 2 csecs so first daughter my milk never came in like ever. I was really ill with her and needed blood transfusions and was so poorly the whole preg that I’d already been advised that the quality of my milk either wouldn’t be good enough or producing would make me ill, as it happens I didn’t produce a single drop 😱 dd2 I had via csec at 37 weeks and milk took ages to come in and she had no latch so I had to express what I could and topup with aptamil.

So this time i thought I’d love to be more prepared and give it a good go and harvest my colostrum etc but it doesn’t come in until 37w which is when I’ll be having baby and I didn’t realise until I was researching that anaemia, low blood count, csecs and having babies early all go against breastfeeding. Making it more difficult. I am gutted. I will still try but has anyone any experience? Does anyone know if I can encourage my milk to come in before 37w?? Xx

@Mrsi2020 my sister had a c section at 38 weeks and she breastfed fine. I have no experience as this is my first, but I would definitely try and eat really well in the last 4 weeks. Protein is really important for good quality colostrum (for cows anyway 🤭😝) Also intrigued by this colostrum harvesting.

@Mrsi2020 I breastfed DD until she was just over 1yo. I can remember having some small leakages of colostrum in the final weeks of pregnancy but didn’t save any. She was born at 38+4. Due to her low birth weight she had to had formula top up feeds in hospital which I wasn’t thrilled with at first but I decided to think of it as medicine to make her stronger. I was on the huge NHS electric plug in double breast pump to stimulate milk so as well as feeding her straight from the breast I had some milk in teeny bottles in the ward fridge. By the time we came home on day 3 she didn’t have any more formula and I didn’t express any more. It did hurt (nip/pinch) in the early days, I highly recommend Lanisoh nipple cream. But soon enough that subsided and it didn’t feel like anything, or rather it felt nice/positive/bonding! I didn’t get any blocked ducts or mastitis which I know some people can get.

@Mrsi2020

I breastfed DS (he was born at 38 weeks exactly) and had no issues with my milk coming in. However, DS was admitted for jaundice when he was 2 days old and we spent 5 days back in hospital where they made me feed him, then express and top him up with expressed milk (I refused formula which in hindsight was the best decision as he turned out to be intolerant to cows milk!) but I think that probably boosted my supply somewhat. I must admit I'm very surprised that blood transfusions potentially affect the quality of your milk, that's not anything I've ever heard before and very sad if that's the case. Fingers crossed nothing like that happens to you again this time 🤞🏼🤞🏼

It's true that you can harvest colostrum, but provided you have a fairly straightforward c section it shouldn't affect your ability to breastfeed even at 37 weeks. My mum had 5 c-sections and breastfed every one of us.

In terms of when it comes in, colostrum doesn't actually "come in" in the same way as your milk does, so technically you can do it earlier than 37 weeks but I think there are reasons why you shouldn't do it too early so if def discuss with your midwife or consultant first. Actually harvesting it is pretty simple, it's basically just hand expressing it. The way to stimulate production is to essentially (sorry) stimulate your nipples! I'm sure you can watch videos online but it's essentially just squeezing your breast, not necessarily the nipple itself in a motion as if you're honestly just trying to squeeze liquid out your nipple. It comes weirdly naturally. Don't expect it to be anything like actual milk though, it's thick like syrup and comes in vvvvv small quantities. I remember when DS was first born and didn't latch properly for a few hours I was hand expressing and couldn't believe what was coming out 🤣🤣 there's no reason you can't do it, just takes a bit of patience and practice xx

@Mrsi2020 I am worried about breastfeeding both my sisters had issues so I'm scared it's genetic even tho mum had no problems- ones milk didn't come in/latching issues and the other was practically the same but different births!

One had 2 natural births and the other 2 emergency c sections..my older sis also recommended I get some nipple suction buds to help shape the nipple and make it easier to latch

@MrsEmilyB yep we are an all boys thread so far...but we could have a few girls from those choosing not to find out the gender and of course we still have so many babies to find out!

One of my best friends has just announced she's having a baby in April too, due just 2-3 weeks after me 🥰🥰 so exciting!

@Mococo1 yes that's true! We are having a surprise so it's a little bit like schrodingers cat - both a boy and a girl at the same time, until proven otherwise 😂

my dating scan is Thursday and MY GOD I'm so NERVOUS. Time is absolutely dragging. Had a lovely pilates class tonight which helped ease the feelings but the teacher told me she's gonna have to start making adaptions so that I'm not on my back as my bump is already a bit big! I have been finding I get headaches if I lie flat on my back for more than a few minutes - has anyone else had this??

Attack of the headless lady again, but WHY IS MY BUMP SO BUMPY??? 11+4 today. Could there be a second baby not picked up on the first two scans? Is it my short abdomen or abysmally poor core? Could it mean something is wrong?

@MrsEmilyB Nothing wrong with you! Enjoy it, you look lovely!

@Mrsi2020 and @mrsmummy1111 it's funny what you say about transfusions as I had one with my first delivery and I literally never got milk. She was formula fed and I pumped to my hearts content and barely got a dribble so it was exhausting and fruitless. I think my body was concentrating so much on healing that it said fuck the milk production. I guess in the "wild" we both would have died at delivery anyway.

Second time I probably could have breastfed if I stuck to it but I was very mentally vulnerable (honestly should have got help but I just kept going) and I had MIL in my face watching me trying to breastfeed telling me it was unnatural and I gave up pretty quick. I really resent that now it was one of my biggest regrets.

This time I am utterly determined. I bought a medela pump off my friend who bought one a used it twice. I'm not gonna get any milk or bottles so I don't give up 😂 this is my LAST baby so I'm gonna do what I want to do and everyone else can fuck off.

No response back from the friend re bringing the baby to the wedding. Hmmm.

And @SmileyT not silly at all - I wouldn't know if I didn't have school age kids. But the nasal spray is the equivalent flu jab for kids. They do it at school en masse every year.
The consent forms bring out the anti vax mums on the WhatsApp groups but I can't let myself get embroiled in that or I'll punch someone.

Morning girls. Thank you so much for all your replies, really helpful and good to hear positive stories. I don’t think it was necessarily that the blood transfusion affects feeding , I think they meant that I was so poorly that the milk I produced wouldn’t be of good quality and as it happens like @zippityzip I never produced a drop.

My sister with her second child harvested her colostrum, she got loads and then bf for two weeks and got barely any milk, they introduced formula topups after a week as baby had literally lost so much weight . My sister spent the first two weeks in tears, with baby crying the whole time as she introduced barely any formula so as not to affect her supply (which like me it never came in) . She ended up ff. I wonder can it be in your genes too? Well I’m gonna try and just see how I go and hopefully all works out.

My sister said it ruined the first month for her and she didn’t enjoy that time at all 😭 how sad. Her other daughter again no sign of milk but by day 3 she just went to ff. it’s scary, I know our bodies are made for this but it’s just not always so straightforward. I’d love to be able to bf abs for it to be quite natural, I know it’ can be time consuming and painful but just as straightforward as it can go lol xx

Also if anyone needs any baby things Amazon prime deals are on today and tomorrow, quite a few bargains on there xxx

@MrsEmilyB mine is the same ! I’m supposed to be 12+5 but I look huge ! Partly bloat too

Re the breastfeeding thing- I did both of mine although it was a long time ago. It wasn’t easy at first, I remember having the sorest, scab burst and bloodiest nipples but I just applied loads of edible nipple cream and ploughed on

I’d love to say it’s because I was adamant about breast feeding but truth be told o was just too lazy to make up and forever be washing bottles

I expressed loads too and it went well- I used to freeze it in little bags so I could have nights off and introduced the bottle early to enable them to get used to it when they were little (maybe three feeeds a week from six weeks ) and also used it to encourage them to drink water from it from about the same age
Just really to top up tummies as mine seemed to feed forever
I was only a young girl though so it was probably all the wrong thing to do but I’m pleased I pushed the water early . They grew to love it and neither of them were juice drinkers ! Also helped me settle them into a routine and they were both good solid sleepers from an early age too

Like anything , think the most important thing is that you do what is right for you
No pressure on yourself and no expectations
I think that’s the best way.

Also my scan is Thursday and I’m shitting myself
I can’t help feeling not very pregnant
I don’t know why but I’m so dreading it
I really wanna get excited about being pregnant but it seems too good to be true

Am I just a bit mad

@Mustbemad82 Not mad at all. Last night and this morning I don't feel pregnant at all. No flutters, no aching or sick feeling. No nothing really.
I just feel completely normal. Which is unnerving me and I've seen the baby on 3 different scans already.
I don't think the worry ever stops to be honest!!

Thanks for sharing your feeding journey. I was always warned off avoiding the bottle when BF so it's good to know it doesn't totally confuse them!

Yeah my MIL is the same. She thought breastfeeding was "gross and creepy" and if I bf in front of her she left the room. GROW UP!!!! Thankfully she lives 6 hours away so I didn't have to deal with it often.

At the end of the day, I'm grateful that we now live in a world where we have choices. And where we don't need to die giving birth 😱 Breastfeeding isn't always easy, and I think we're put under so much pressure to have the perfect birth, and to breastfeed and do everything how society thinks we should. But it's not always as simple as that. Don't put yourself under pressure to feed the way other people want you to, it's your baby not theirs. I know people who bf and hated every second but did it because they felt like they should. But were miserable and resentful doing it. And others who gave up and regretted it for so long as they think if they'd persevered they could've continued. You're a pro by now, this is your 3rd baby you know exactly what you're doing, but all you can do is your best and if it doesn't work this time at least you did it the way you wanted to.

@Mustbemad82 - I'm Thursday too! Absolutely bricking it and it's not til 2:30! Aside from the heartburn and the big bump I feel completely normal!

@Mrsi2020 - ooh any recommendations?

@zippityzip personally I never agreed with the whole “confusing them theory”
I thought mine were confused enough, they sometimes seemed that think day was night and night was day!!!
Think the bottle requires a different seal and mouth action but babies by their very nature and little survivors and will adapt! I used both as it was about me having a break too and also about supporting DH To be able to share that magical process of feeding them . I’ll do it again- I’m a lot older now and feel much more confident in my decision making and so I’ll do what feels best- that’s the most important thing for us all

@zippityzip it’s not just me then- I saw the baby over a week ago at 11+4 and things were ok but I’m still a wreck - my scan is 11-10 and I’m not sleeping at all- my sickness has all but gone and my boobs although a little tender aren’t as sore as they were

I just hope things are ok

We haven’t allowed ourselves to talk or plan anything yet - it’s like we’ve been holding our breath for almost 13 weeks !

I totally agree @Mustbemad82 - if that was the case then nobody would ever be able to combi feed. And I know people do. My boy took a bottle on day 2 and he never had nipple confusion. We breastfed for a long time and he had a bottle a day, every day from the day he was born. We had a routine very early (shock, I'm a routine person 🤣) and it meant DH did the late night feed every night, because even though he was having exclusively breastmilk, it meant it didn't HAVE to be me. It also meant my mum could take him if I wanted to get my hair done, or I needed a few hours break and she knew he would be ok. I plan on doing exactly the same this time round.

One thing I would say for anyone wanting to bf though, is if you do decide to express and give baby a bottle just make sure you're expressing whatever feed baby misses as well. I didn't do that initially for the 11pm feed and found my supply started to dwindle at that time. If you plan on never breastfeeding a specific feed again then don't bother, but I knew I wanted to have the option to do that feed if I wanted to. That's why I got the elvie, as it meant I just sat up in bed asleep and elvie did the work, and when it was finished DH would basically unhook me and I'd not even wake 🤣. It's pricy but it honestly saved me so much time it was worth every penny

@LittleRa we were in Primark yesterday and saw loads of little bits but holding off buying any clothes for a while yet and also wondering whether I just get a load of clothes in different sizes. If baby is as small as me and my siblings tiny baby would still be too big but if they are as big as my nephews they'd be in 0-3 how do I decide?

@mrsmummy1111 @LittleRa can I ask why you initially wanted to reject formula? As a FTM I'm just curious what the reasons to prefer one over the other?

@Ltay2 yay to finding out she is pregnant aswell... did you have an inkling before she announced? x

@MrsEmilyB it's completely normal for people to have different shapes and sizes in pregnancy just remember we all kinda end up in the same place so it's all good. You look so cute, I'd love to have a proper bump but I think I naturally breathe in all the time 😂

@zippityzip ahh that's makes about the nasal spray and pretty clever to save on having to poke all the kids 👌🏾 also I've heard so much stuff since being pregnant about bottle refusers and all sorts, I just feel like babies follow the lead their given... my extended family is weird in British terms and family always look after babies from quite young and bottle feed (either expressed or formula) and then BF at home and I've never seen any babies have any issues with it. I think a lot of it comes from mums not wanting anyone else to feed than the babies actually being bothered 🤔

@Mustbemad82 I think it's totally normal to be a bit nervous, scanxiety is a thing but I'm sure all will be well xx

@SmileyT It's 100% personal preference. It can be a very emotive subject and I'm very much in the camp of - fed is best. However you choose to feed your baby is the best decision for you and your family. Me personally? I do believe that PURELY from a nutritional standpoint, formula isn't equal to breastmilk. That's not to say it's not good enough, of course it is! But I did lots of research and decided that if I got the choice, I would want my baby to be exclusively breastfed. There were SO many factors that went into my decision - nutrition, ease, bonding, antibodies and many more. You get all of these with formula as well, I just knew that if I could breastfeed, for me personally it was preferable.

@MrsEmilyB Your bump is beautiful nothing wrong at all!! Good luck with your scan on Thursday sure everything will be absolutely fine! Yours too @Mustbemad82 ❤️

@SmileyT I had no idea! I was actually worried when I announced mine that she may be upset or something as I didn't know if they were trying so didn't want to be over the top and insensitive and her response, whilst extremely happy and positive for me, wasn't as 'OMGGG' as everyone else's but I now know she was probably in shock thinking she was about to tell everyone the week after 😂 must have been a confusing week for her having to keep hers a secret for just a little bit longer!

Booking my 16 week midwife appointment today, seems to have come around so fast!

I love this feeding talk, it's so non judgemental for a change!! Plus I'm learning.

@LittleRa Good call on the primark stuff - I'm defo growing out of my larger bras so will have a look in there. Been ages since I've have a spend up in primark I may go and treat myself on payday. How exciting life gets!

@mrsmummy1111 At least your MIL left the room mine has such FOMO she was on the driveway before I had even left the hospital so she could be the first person to see the baby. Twat. This time I just won't let her in. When my SIL gave birth she practically threw my niece at me at the doorstep and legged it to the hospital. (My SIL asked her to look after my niece whilst she in labour so she COULDNT just turn up at the hospital) the cheek of it was unreal.