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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

Cheeky midwife?

70 replies

Cindy974 · 23/09/2020 20:09

Hi all,

So today I had my 34 week midwife appointment, my regular midwife was on holiday so I had a lady who id never had before.

Before I was pregnant I was a size 14, and since then I’ve gained about a stone and a half.
Anyways midwife weighs me then lays me on the bed to check position of baby, as I'm laying there she says “Have you ever thought about starting slimming world?”. I was like eh? Does she mean now or after the babies born?!
The more I’ve thought about it the more offended Ive gotten, I am only 5’2 so I do look big but its all bump and if you cant put weight on during pregnancy when can you?

Has anyone had this before? Am I just being overly sensitive for letting it bother me?

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AmandaHoldensLips · 23/09/2020 20:18

Yikes. 34 weeks isn't the time to be telling a woman about slimming world. Shifting the baby weight afterwards can be a bit gruelling, but if ever there is a time to address health and fitness, it's then.

I enjoyed stuffing my face with fresh scones, jam and dollops of cream when I was breastfeeding. Anyone who tried to take them away from me was risking serious injury.

Then I got all the weight off...

TheresALight · 23/09/2020 20:19

My regular midwife weighed me at about the same time when I'd put on probably almost 2 stone too. She "helpfully" reminded me that 'anything over 1.5 is extra weight and would have to be worked off after the baby was born'. So basically saying don't put on anymore weight, even though the baby obviously has a huge growth spurt in the last few weeks! I also thought it was really inappropriate and could have done a lot of damage to anyone with an eating disorder or not confident enough to know that not every placenta and baby will weight exactly the same! I was 9 stone before getting pregnant so an extra stone really wouldn't have hurt anyway, I'm at least 10lb more now 4 years later and I honestly don't give a fig!

Alanares89 · 23/09/2020 20:20

Hiya

I’m 5’2 and a size 14 as well and I would find it a bit cheeky and unnecessary for her to talk about slimming word when your growing a child!
I know you will be over thinking it but seriously don’t worry too much about it, some midwifes can be a bit cheeky (usually the ones that are covering from the usual midwifes I always find!)

Enjoy the last few weeks off pregnancy and I wish you well and don’t worry about eating all the chocs at Christmas either, be good to yourself xxxxx

Suzi888 · 23/09/2020 20:24

slimming world. You aren’t allowed to diet when pregnant, are you? (I mean eat healthily obviously) but a diet like slimming world seems extreme!

Gemc81 · 23/09/2020 20:28

@Suzi888 slimming world is approved for pregnant women to follow

Mc3209 · 23/09/2020 20:28

I've got a midwife appointment next week and I am dreading that weigh in. I started at 52kg and gained in the region of 20kg by now (currently 34 weeks). I stopped weighing myself few weeks ago.
I would have found that comment made by your midwife quite insensitive.

AllTheUsernamesAreAlreadyTaken · 23/09/2020 20:37

It’s her job to make sure you’re healthy. I understand it hurts your feelings though.

Musmerian · 23/09/2020 20:50

You don’t have to be weighed in pregnancy- it’s optional. Very unprofessional and I would complain.

DontDribbleOnTheCarpet · 23/09/2020 20:52

I think it's odd that she went straight for SW, instead of talking more generally about weight gain or diet (which I would have been fine with, because if I can talk to someone about my perineum, then my weight should be a doddle!). I wonder if she has any connection to a local group?

AnneLovesGilbert · 23/09/2020 20:59

Dress sizes don’t mean anything so if you were overweight before pregnancy the advice is to gain less than if you were a normal bmi, more if you were underweight. A healthy weight means pregnancy and delivery are likely to be easier and it’s better for your baby. I don’t think she was cheeky, trying to insult you or insensitive, though general diet and lifestyle advice would be more appropriate than plugging slimming world. Maybe it’s worked for her or other women she’s cared for. You don’t have to listen to her advice. If you feel you’re healthy and having a good pregnancy that’s great.

lookingatthings · 23/09/2020 21:06

@DontDribbleOnTheCarpet

It's been a thing for years. Slimming World on Referral. www.slimmingworld.co.uk/health/swor/how-does-it-work.aspx

JacobReesMogadishu · 23/09/2020 21:06

I think you can do slimming world while pregnant. She does have a job to do and maybe wasn’t very tactful but the average weight gain in pregnancy is 10-12kg. If you’re a bit overweight before then ideally you should gain less than that. You’ve already gained 10kg and have another 6-8 weeks of pregnancy to go. Going to SW can help you think about healthy eating choices to limit further weight gain.

BlueJava · 23/09/2020 21:08

Wow! The only thing I can think of is she gets cash for referrals. That's not even just rude - it's actually wrong to diet now!

Twickerhun · 23/09/2020 21:10

Side question..... Is weighing in for pregnancy a thing now? I wasn’t weighed for either of mine at all. The midwife asked me my weight at the first appointment and wrote down what I said and never checked again.

Ohalrightthen · 23/09/2020 21:22

Unfortunately, we have an obesity epidemic and being overweight increases your risks during pregnancy. If you're overweight, she's right to suggest ways for you to lose weight, and slimming world is suitable for pregnant women.

It's not nice to hear you've got a problem with your weight, and i do sympathise, but she's a health professional. It's her job to make sure you and the baby get through this pregnancy safe and well, not to make sure you don't get your feelings hurt. If you're overweight, you're overweight, and you should do something about it.

StephenKong · 23/09/2020 21:27

It's her job to make sure you're as healthy as possible. It wasn't long before the I'd complain bollocks started, I note 🤦‍♀️
Either take her advice or ignore it, isn't that what normal people do?

DontDribbleOnTheCarpet · 23/09/2020 21:30

How much weight is a pregnant woman going to be able to shift in 6-ish weeks anyway?

Asking a question even vaguely related to weight on Mumsnet is always going to result in at least one person telling you that it's all your fault because you are definitely a whale. Someone may be along shortly to discuss the best technique for weighing your daily lettuce leaf (singular!). It might be more sensible to speak to your usual midwife, and talk to her both about your weight and if she has concerns about it, and also about the other MW. After all, if all she gave you was advice to join a slimming club, that was not nearly all the information you need, or very supportive.

StephenKong · 23/09/2020 21:30

@BlueJava

Wow! The only thing I can think of is she gets cash for referrals. That's not even just rude - it's actually wrong to diet now!

No, it's not. That is outdated nonsense.

Addicted89 · 23/09/2020 21:32

1 1/2 stone! Well done, I gained nearly 4 stone 🙈🙈. Baby is 6 months old and I’ve got half a stone to loose to get back to pre pregnancy weight.
It’s part of their job to encourage mums to be to as healthy as possible, as unhelpful as it may be at 34 weeks!

OhTheRoses · 23/09/2020 21:33

Gosh. When I was pg with my first I had put on 2st at 32 weeks and was worried. I started at 9st 7lb. Midwife said it was perfectly normal gain. I put on another 7lb before he was born at 36 weeks. 6 weeks after his birth I was 9st5lb.

I have never been so hungry as when I was pg. Every time.

Suzi888 · 23/09/2020 21:34

@Gemc81Pregnancy - Slimming World
Our policy for pregnant members Slimming World do not advise on weight change during a member's pregnancy and do not encourage weight loss during this time. Instead we support members in eating a healthy diet and remaining physically active. Just looked it up, needs a hell of a lot of MW support and constant monitoring for too much weight loss.

VeraPink · 23/09/2020 21:35

So bloody rude! YANBU, that was really cheeky.

Original poster

Cindy974 · 23/09/2020 21:36

Fair enough I need to be told, it was more the delivery of it, she had already weighed me, moved on to something else then just randomly asked, surely there are more tactful ways?

OP posts:

Nat6999 · 23/09/2020 21:52

I put 4 stone on during my pregnancy, I was around 13 stone when I got pregnant & gained 4 stone before my induction date including at least 1.5 stone of fluid due to pre eclampsia gained within a week. Within a month of my emcs, I only weighed 10 stone, I had been in high dependency with hellp syndrome, my organs started failing. I'm convinced that if I hadn't had some extra body fat, I would have died, the extra fat kept me going, I never got a meal in hospital, other than a sandwich a day which my mum brought me, I never had any food (extremely poor care in hospital) Don't worry about your weight now, think about it afterwards when you & your baby are both safe & well.

eddiemairswife · 23/09/2020 22:06

When I had my pregnancies women were routinely weighed at every doctor or midwife appointment. I don't know why it isn't done now, or why some people are so much against it.

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