How do you stay relaxed?

[BabyE8]

Hello,

So I had an early MC in May/June during my first pregnancy after a year of TTC.

I tested yesterday and got a faint positive. I’m about 10 DPO on CD30 today, cycles usually last about 29-31 days and I normally spot for anything up to a week before it arrives (no spotting at all so far). DH and I started investigations this cycle, my CD22 bloods showed low progesterone however my OPK’s only had me ovulating CD20 so I’m wondering if this caused the low result.

I am waiting til tomorrow to test again and really hoping that this is finally it 🤞🏼 However I am so, so anxious and know that this can be bad in early pregnancy.

Does anyone have any hints or tips on how to keep calm? I’m about to try some 4-6 wk pregnancy yoga 🧘‍♀️

@BabyE8 sorry you're feeling that way and sorry for your loss. I can relate to your experience - it feels like such a long journey when you've had a stressful time TTC and then a MC as well.

Things that worked for me:

• remember to breathe. Taking a deep breath when I start to feel out of control really helps. Even if it only helps for 20 minutes, that's a success.
• going outdoors for a short walk somewhere as green as possible. I go in the rain if I have to.
• video games (never played before but found them properly distracting after my MC!)
• don't expect to feel perfect all the time. Most women worry during pregnancy and most babies are fine. Remember that and don't beat yourself up if you aren't in a state of zen 24/7.

Your MC was really recent - I know for me everything gets mixed up in my head and it feels like I've been pregnant for months even though I am only 8wks and I am double guessing myself all the time (I actually told DH I was worried my nausea getting better when I managed to catch my breath while heaving over a bowl this morning! That man is a saint for not laughing.)

I also got a counsellor (private but details from EPU) and have found that really helpful to help me process my MC and to cope with this PG. It won't be for everyone but for me it is money well spent to have someone I can share my crazy thoughts with once a week.

Good luck. Fingers crossed for you.

I set small milestones and only focused on them. I have had two mc in the past 12 months and now 18 weeks pregnant and have told about 5 people as I won't start to feel confident until after 20 week scan - that is my next milestone.

Upto 12 weeks - each week for a milestone and never looked beyond those.

I booked a private scan at 8 weeks has my anxiety was out of control as I lost my last two at that point. Once I got past 9 weeks it was easier.

When I have had scans I tell the sonographer I have lost babies. With each they have told me quickly there is a heartbeat.

So small steps and don't look too far into the future

@mimba1 that’s so helpful thankyou! I think that’s a massive part of the problem, I feel like I’m not relaxed then I panic that I’m panicking which makes it even worse! It’s so silly when I put it that way. The video games one is actually very clever - I played my husbands play station the other night and it absolutely kept my mind off everything for a while! Congratulations on your pregnancy xx

@welshladywhois40 that’s a great idea with the milestones. I think I will be booking an 8 week scan also for peace of mind. That’s great to know about giving the sonographer a heads up about past loss, so they can reassure quickly. Thankyou for your information & good luck with the rest of your pregnancy, nearly half way there! X

@welshladywhois40 I think I'll try to take some of your advice on board as well! I've also had 2 MC in last 12 months, also both in the 8th week. I'm 8+2 now and going crazy - called the EPU in tears this morning because all my symptoms had gone overnight and then threw up my breakfast at about 11am (now convinced myself it's anxiety sickness!). Scan booked for Tuesday - seems so far away. Always good to hear from someone who's actually living proof of 3rd time lucky as well. It's so easy to think there's something wrong after 2. Good luck for your 20wk scan.