Elective C Section advice

[chocolatecake82]

Hi everyone, I'm currently 18+3 with my second , I'm 38 yrs old and although it's still a long way away, the thought of giving birth again is really freaking me out!
First time round I had a natural birth (I hate that term - every delivery is a natural birth!! ) was induced with episiotomy and ventouse, it was horrific (I know that no one emerges out of child birth claiming it was a breeze) but the whole experience really left me feeling like I didn't want to go through that again.
I would like to ask about a C section, but I certainly don't think this is the easier option, the healing, the immobility afterwards, not being able to drive etc, these are some of the things I need to think about and that's why I would like to ask the opinions of mums out there who have been there.
Do I just knuckle down and hope that this time around it may be not too bad , or do I ask for/enquire about a C section?
Thanks ladies

Sounds like you're wanting to opt for a c section out of fear rather than choice. Which area are you from, I would talk to a doula if possible, they are amazing and I'm having one for my second birth, my first was a horrific induction, but was able to talk through the experience with a doula and she gave me the confidence to realism that I didn't have to make choices out of fear and that just because one experience was like that it doesn't mean another will be x

Hi OP, my first "natural" birth was an utter shit show from start to finish and left me with a 3rd degree tear, anemia from a pph and sepsis. Had an ELCS with my second and it was an absolute breeze in comparison! I was automatically referred to a consultant due to my 3rd degree tear but if you're not then definitely ask to be. On the other hand, I do know other women who've gone for a vaginal birth again after a traumatic one and everything has gone really smoothly. There's no harm in asking and talking through the pros and cons of the different types of delivery. Good luck with whatever you decide.

Hi OP,
I had to have a caesar for my first (and only) - wanted natural, found out 3 days before due date. I'm one of those people who's happy to take the medical advice and just went with it. And you're not really supposed to say this - but I loved my caesar! I found the whole process fascinating and amazing from a medical POV and I think because it was planned and careful pain management I was up and walking next day and the pain kinda felt like after a big tummy workout at the gym. Cleared to drive after 2 weeks and pretty nice neat scar. Of course, this is not everyone's experience and one thing I will say is they cut through your core muscles so rebuilding them through (gentle) pilates is a must otherwise you use your back muscles to lift everything - and that can end in pain. But i was really happy with how it went and have no regrets

Hi - I don’t think there is any harm in asking about an elective and considering it as a potential option. I had an emergency c section with my first (after long labour and pushing for an hour) and I had a surprise VBAC with my second (I was booked for an elective and she had other plans on the day it was actually booked LOL!)

So I have been through both and from my experience I would say

• I found the c-section experience absolutely fine. And that was an emergency and from what I hear electives are generally nicer
• I found the recovery from the c-section more predictable. I felt how I expected to if that made sense and save for after my very first shower in the hospital straight after getting out of bed, when I needed help to pull my pants up I managed everything fine post section. Didn’t need much in the way of pain relief. With the VBAC I had a small tear and small epi - I was quite bruised and my poor bum, tailbone were also sore.
• the c-section recovery was longer than the VBAC but I probably felt worse initially with the VBAC (this may be down to having done it on a fast as I was booked for the surgery). I’ve honestly never felt so whipped in my entire life, I’ve not run a marathon but it felt like I had.
• second labour and birth were SO different! With my first I was in labour for ages, and got to 10cm without much drama. Just my tens machine and a bit of gas and air. With my second I hadn’t had a single twinge whatsoever but woke up an hour before my alarm was set in full on pain. Went straight

to the hospital, really couldn’t even lay on my back to examined and when they were able to check me they were like “oh that’s the head!” and then within another hour or so baby was here.

• I think if I had managed to push my first one out the second would have been much easier but honestly the pushing bit was a bit wild with my second as it happened so fast and was totally unfamiliar. With my first they told me to push because I was 10cm but clearly it wasn’t going to happen as i now know what it feels like when a baby is actually coming!

And finally i know how hard it is to decide, so just take some time and look at all the options. Probably the best thing I did both times was the hypnobirthing book and tracks. I agonised so much over the decision for my second and then it went the other way anyway.

If you pan to give birth in NHS hospital then I would hurry up.. The earlier you start mentioning your plans for C-Section the better. If you do want C-Section be fully prepared to fight for it. It is possible but most hospitals will be reluctant. Midwife can't make this decision, you need to insist on an appointment with a consultant. You will have to present a very convincing case for elective C-Section.
If you are not sure what you want I would try and assess the risks if what are you scared most.
Are you afraid of negative outcome for your baby? If that's your main reason statistically C-Section is safer
Are you afraid of the pain? Then I would consider looking into various options from anaesthetics to hypnobirth
Are you concerned about your own health? The choice would depend on what you would consider a higher risk.. Potential complication from csection like infections or various pelvic floor traumas..
Look at the statistics for each scenarios

Also consider how important for you to be and up running quickly after the birth and do you plan to have more than 2 other children..

I chose csection based on my own risk assessment

With my first I had a natural delivery which resulted in a third degree tear because I delivered her head and anything stopped. The emergency bell was pulled and I had to push on nothing which ultimately caused a bit of a mess.
My second I had an elcs. I did a lot of research first and spoke to two different consultants to way up my options and ultimately decided that a section was safer for both me and DS. My section was an amazing experience, so calm and relaxed but it's definitely not an easy option. Recovery isn't easy although I did recover quickly I was one of the lucky ones.
I'm now just over 6 weeks away from my second section and I'm very nervous about recovery this time however it is again the safest option for me and the baby.
I think you need to discuss your concerns with your midwife and she'll refer if needed

I was the same op. Hated it first time round although it was all textbook, birthing pool, gas and air blah blah. Felt very conned that nobody had spoken to me about the physical after effects. Said I'd only do it again with a C-section. Awful doctor told me id never get one. Put off having another DC until could afford a private c. At my first midwife appointment they told me, oh yes you'll get an NHS one. I know it differs trust to trust but ours is totally pro maternal choice. Very horrible doc totally wrong. Consultants very sympathetic, talked to one and his senior, both agreed and scheduled me a csection date immediately. So, so relieved. Although also scared as I know it's no picnic.

I have had one emergency and one planned c-section and while they are a tad brutal - overall the process was really good and the healing was quick. I will have a c section with my third.

On the other hand my best friend has an awful vaginal birth and a emergency c section and said she would have taken her third degree tear over surgery any day! So o guess it will always depend on the individual.

Good luck

Thank you so much ladies for all your truthful replies . It's just what I needed and it's given me the confidence to speak to the midwife next week to discuss both options further.
I'm going to do my research and take it from there. I'm swaying towards c section but as a pp said, this is most probably down to fear so I need to address that first and make the right decision for me and the baby .
Good luck to those who are expecting soon 😘