Feeling overwhelmed - is it ok to leave baby asleep while I shower?

[Aug122020]

Hey everyone,

So I had my baby recently and he is a week old, my partner is back at work the week after next and I’m really worrying about how to manage without him helping me.

DH was in the shower today and I needed a wee, baby was sound asleep in his Moses basket so I quickly went to the loo just as DH came out the shower and he asked what I was doing and said I should never leave him alone and now I feel so guilty 😫.

What should I do when I need to make him a bottle or go to the toilet when I’m home alone? Is it safer to take baby with me? We don’t really have anything easy to sit baby in in the kitchen when I make a bottle unless I take his basket but it’s quite heavy for me and I’m terrified I drop it 😬

I’m a first time mum so I’ve got no idea what everyone else does. I suffer with anxiety and I just feel like I’m doing everything wrong.

If I should take him with me is there anything you’d recommend so I can easily sit him in another room with me while I wash or go to the toilet or make him a bottle etc?

Thank you x

I think to call your partner stupid is harsh, it's a hard time being a new parent, I suspect he was just worried, he may have thought you had left him to do more than go toilet and was there a little while. Don't worry, and don't feel guilty, it's a massive learning curve for both mum and dad. Your doing a great job @Aug122020 !! Hope you feel reassured x

I’d just be happy that you’ve got a baby who is able to be put down and stay asleep long enough for you to get a shower!

I was fairly anxious with my first but I never took him to the loo!!

When my son was tiny I'd put him on his change mat in the bathroom floor while I shower or used the toilet. He wasn't going anywhere and could see me.

My husband and I soon came to realise that we are both anxious parents from the first night our baby came home. We both did not sleep and we watched our baby. All. Night. Long.
He has not relaxed more but I am still an anxious mother.
When my baby was newborn, it really helped to have the moses basket downstairs and then a bedside crib upstairs. That way, I didn't have to keep carrying the moses basket around or drop it downstairs!
It also meant I could just move the basket to the kitchen on its stand easily if I needed to.
We ordered a beanbag chair /seat thing and that's great for feeding baby and then putting them upright in it afterwards. It has a strap so they are fastened in. It's also lightweight and can be moved around.
I have had many sleepless nights worrying about SIDS. I just remember being told that an empty cot is a safe cot.