When did you announce your pregnancy?

[december2020]

Hi,

Currently only 4 people know of my pregnancy: my parents, one friend and DH (of course).

I have my 12 week scan tomorrow and we're starting to think about telling close family and friends. However, as I think I'm only about 11+1 or 2 tomorrow, not "officially" over the 12 week "safety bar".

Did you tell people of your pregnancy after the scan, wait till the "official" 12 weeks or wait till the screening tests come back?
Also if you put anything up on social media, did you wait longer?

I know this is very subjective and the answer is do what feels right for you, but I'd be interested in hearing everyone's experiences and points of view.

Very personal choice I think.

With my last pregnancy, I told a lot of my friends and family after the 12 week mark. However I unfortunately lost that pregnancy at 19 weeks and so letting people know was very difficult and I regretted telling so many.

I'm pregnant again and we've decided not to tell anyone (aside from parents and a couple of close friends who I'd tell about a loss anyway) until we've had our 20 week scan. What happened before is unlikely to happen again but I feel that I would always have an element of doubt if I were to tell anyone sooner and tbh fb announcements at 12 weeks make me feel a bit uncomfortable given my history.

But it's very much your personal choice, it's a happy time and I know it makes you want to shout it from the rooftops.

I'm 22 weeks today and still not told everyone 😂 I told parents before the 12 week scan then most friends after the 12 week scan, but only told everyone else since the 20 week scan, it was becoming a bit obvious hehe

I did after the scan. If it looks normal on the scan you can probably get away with being under 12 weeks and in any case you may get a slightly different date

I had my first scan yesterday and we told my parents once they had finished work and went to my DH parents to tell them (socially distanced in their garden). We also video called his sister to tell her. Going to tell rest of family today and work colleagues last. But there is no right or wrong way to tell them just however you feel comfortable

I told my parents I was engaged at Christmas, so the following Christmas I told them I was pregnant- six weeks. As it was just my immediate family I didn't see the point of waiting. After all if I'd had a miscarriage i would have told them about that. After we told them we told everyone else (though no big announcement thing, he told his parents and i told a few friends when i saw them).

I'm 6 weeks pregnant and I've told close family members, close friends and I also told my manager and team at work - I know I could lose the pregnancy but I'm not ashamed of having a miscarriage and I don't think any woman should be, we need support during that time - I hate the whole wait until 12 weeks so you can suffer alone if anything happens - it's a personal choice though and I do understand why people wait - it's just my thought process

I told close friends, family and my manager at 8 weeks as I'd had a private scan and heard the heartbeat, those were the people I was happy to know if anything went wrong. Anyone else was after the 12-week scan including putting it on social media.

My closest friend and our immediate families knew at about 7 weeks as I'd have wanted them to know if anything went wrong too. My work also had to know then due to being a nurse and the whole covid thing, not when I wanted to tell them at all but they understood I was early and were very supportive. Then my dating scan was at 12+1, where we told everyone and put on social media 😊

I think it's completely up to you. I told my mum straight away and obviously my DH. We had a private scan at 8 weeks and I told my brother and my best friend as I knew I would talk to them about everything any way. I'm 23 weeks and we're not formally announcing anything on social media but I did text my friends after the 12 week scan to tell them and if I bump into people they obviously find out due to bump. But it's up to you do what feels right and makes you feel comfortable.

I was most nervous about telling my boss as he is a bit of a dick - I told him at 14 weeks even though you don't have to tell them that early, once you tell them your more protected!

Good luck with the scan, let us know how you get on xxx

We told our parents after the 12 week scan but told them it was also to be kept quiet until after the screening was back. After screening was back, we told the family and friends we wanted to know as we seen them. No fb announcements for us as I had an MC last year and it makes me quite uncomfortable - love seeing other people's, but it's just not for me. X

I told my parents and in-laws almost as soon as I found out couldn’t keep it to myself!
Told family and close friends after 12 week scan and then told everyone else after 20 week scan.

Oh wow! I'm loving the experiences and just how different they all are! It really is true, do what suits you best.

We're a bit conflicted, I'd love to tell the in-laws as I think they'd be so happy, but DH is adamant telling them is like broadcasting it on the news (not because they're spiteful but rather they get too excited and accidentally let it slip and then follow up with a "act surprised when they tell you"). 😶😂 so we'll tell them once we're ready to tell other close friends and family so they can hear it from us.

On the social media front, I think we'll do some sort of non-vomit inducing post (again as knowing the in-laws someone will post something and I'd hate for anyone we haven't told within the closer circle to find out from a random tagged post).

Don't get my wrong, I absolutely love my in-laws, they are really wonderful, just terrible at keeping secrets 😂

My 12 week scan is also tomorrow! We're telling friends and I'll tell work, our families already know. I won't put it on social media until we know the gender but that's just my preference xx

I told my mum and PIL at 6 months. I'm so glad I left it that late as I'd have hated the fuss and the attention. I wasn't showing and no one had guessed.

I had three miscarriages before my baby.

I hate the twelve week thing. My lost babies were not a dirty secret.

Tell anyone you would also untell, is my thinking.

I told my dh when I was 5 weeks pregnant! Followed by my mum and dad, pil's and employers at the time. Our ds was a much longed for baby as we had been ttc for 4 years. I just couldn't keep it to myself as I was ecstatic. I told everyone, I was so happy and it never occurred to me to keep it quiet until after the 12 week scan or anything. Ds 14 now!

Told close family and friends before 12 weeks, probably around 8/10.
Then slowly told more people, working from home meant a lot of word don’t know. Told a few more after 20 week scan. No real announcement though, social media wise!

We told our close family and a few friends when we found out which I'm glad I did as I felt like I had support when I had bleeding at 6 weeks, especially when I was in hospital for 3 hours on my own as partner had to wait in the car. After the 12 week scan we told friends and family by message. Partner wants to do a big social media announcement and I do but I'm holding off as I was due to start a new job a week after lockdown began at a hotel, at the start of lockdown they emailed loads and reassured me I still have a job when they open (they don't know I'm pregnant) but I sent them an email 3 weeks ago just to check in and keep in touch and haven't had a reply! So I don't know if I have a job to go to or not! We have a private scan in 2 weeks so partner can see baby and so we can find out the gender together, part of me wants to do the announcement then but what if I still haven't heard from my new employers, I don't want to send another email and seem like I'm pestering them

Very personal decision. We told our parents at 4 weeks (IVF baby, if we hadn’t said anything they would have assumed the worst). Had to tell my manager at 6 weeks due to Covid... due to Covid and remote working I plan to tell my colleagues after my 20 week. I couldn’t get away with that if I was going into the office every day.

We told close friends and our families at 14 weeks. No social media announcement yet, I think we will put something out very close to the end. Due to our journey I have very mixed feelings about sticking a public announcement out but know that many do and that’s cool (and agree it’s the easiest way to get the news out there)!

I told my work the day after we found out as I'm a lab worker so needed a new risk assessment. I had to tell 2 colleagues a few weeks later as I needed them to do things I could no longer do.
I started telling a few people at work after 13 weeks when we had the scan, mostly to explain why I looked and felt dreadful!! I made an announcement the day the company set up their covid 19 wfh policy at 18 weeks.
We told my partners family at 16 weeks, my family at 17 weeks and friends after the 20 week scan.
I don't like fuss so this worked for us and I quite enjoyed having it as our little secret. I struggled quite a bit during the first trimester so it was a relief that work knew and I tried to be open with colleagues about not being able to do things because of being pregnant. I have a friend who is also a lab worker and she got a load of hassle from colleagues for being lazy when she couldn't do things because of pregnancy and she made the decision not to tell until the 12 week scan. I didn't want to be in this situations as (not that she should have felt the need to tell personal information to stop gossips!)

I would say tell anyone who you’d want to support you if you had to tell them bad news. In terms of the 12 week mark - it’s more the scan around that time that shows a heartbeat that people wait for rather than a magic 12 number (ie 11 is as good as 12 for those purposes)

We have only told close family and friends. I’m 37 +4!

Thank you everyone so far for sharing your experiences. I know I said it earlier but I love how different they all are.

The next people we "should" tell are the in-laws but I think once we tell them it's a bit of an "all or nothing" and we need to tell other friends and family to make sure they hear it from us.

Or due to lockdown and being able to hide it, I could just tell no one till the baby arrives 😂

My pregnancy is IVF so everyone who knew I was having IVF knows - my parents and siblings, mother in law and a couple of my close friends, I told most of them within a day or so of finding out I was pregnant. Work know due to Covid, I told them at 6 weeks, I work in a secondary school so only a handful of staff know - most have no idea, they think I am shielding.

I'm 14 + 5, I have a very large family, some of whom I'm very close to but I'm not ready for the whole family to know so haven't told anyone yet. DH has decided he doesn't want to tell his siblings yet and wants to wait till 20 weeks so we will tell everyone after that as long as everything is ok. No social media announcement, we'll just tell the people we speak to.

@december2020 when we told family, we told them to keep it to themselves until we told everyone we wanted to tell ourselves, after that it didn't matter. We didn't have any problems x