When did you announce your pregnancy?

[december2020]

Hi,

Currently only 4 people know of my pregnancy: my parents, one friend and DH (of course).

I have my 12 week scan tomorrow and we're starting to think about telling close family and friends. However, as I think I'm only about 11+1 or 2 tomorrow, not "officially" over the 12 week "safety bar".

Did you tell people of your pregnancy after the scan, wait till the "official" 12 weeks or wait till the screening tests come back?
Also if you put anything up on social media, did you wait longer?

I know this is very subjective and the answer is do what feels right for you, but I'd be interested in hearing everyone's experiences and points of view.

With my first pregnancy I told close friends and friends right away , I told work and friends at 13 weeks and announced on social media at 14 weeks .

Now I’m 16 weeks pregnant with baby number 2. I’ve only told a couple of close friends from the start and I told work at 13 weeks . I sent my family an announcement in the post but they live overseas from me and there are delays with post so don’t know when they will find out . I don’t know if I’ll announce on social media this time as I’m not really into it anymore and don’t care .

Had 12 week scan last week, told a few people now. With DD1, we just told people when we next saw them, but obviously that's not quite how we're doing it this time.

It's entirely up to you, and you don't need to break the news to everyone all at once. If you want to keep it off social media so you control the timing, it's best to be clear to people about this.

My in laws are like you! And my mum...

I have my 12 week scan tomorrow too and all being well will be sending a wee thing to in laws which should get there by next week so I'll be 12 weeks then if I'm 11 at the scan if that makes sense.
I'll tell my mum after scan and probably hold off with dad for a couple more weeks. My ds knows already but wasn't planning on telling her she sort of guessed and I wasn't going to lie and I told my best friend when I found out as I needed the support and baby chat!

If the screening come back with issues we would want our family's support but going to be very clear nobody else is to know until 20 week scan and I'm not doing social media unless I want to put a family pic up and bump is showing etc, won't be announcing it per se

I'm high risk though, that with covid and the 20 week scan is more detailed due to potential problems for us I would just rather keep it immediate family only.

The way I see it, if something goes wrong who would support us or be loving and who would I feel comfortable telling that to. The answer is not extended family, friends from education or years ago and def not social media so that helps our choice :)

I do feel my family will find it v bittersweet with not seeing us to share the news etc so just hoping it's a happy reaction!

Oh we will tell our dd after 20 week scan if possible to wait til then too

Sister not son!!

My family found out at 5/6 weeks as it was Christmas, DH’s a few weeks after as we wanted to clear a birthday first. A few of our friends know but others won’t know until they arrive. Fast approaching 29 weeks.

Like you say OP, completely up to the individual

Our DD was IVF and a few people knew we were going through it (both parents, close friends and my work) so as soon as I found out we told everyone as they were waiting to hear if it had worked. Kind of didn't have a choice but let work know as I needed time off for many appointments on the run up to it.

I'm now 16+3 with DC2 and the same people know again - work only know this time because it was at the beginning of March when things with COVID started to pick up so I had distance.

Mine is tomorrow too @december2020 and @AliSxo! I also think I will end up measuring smaller.

We’ve told both sets of parents and SIL knows as she was in the room when DH rang. PIL were pushing us to tell his other siblings last weekend but I said no until we’ve had the scan.

We aren’t the type to do social media announcements so I’ll probably tell siblings and best friends after tomorrow (all being well) and then other people from maybe 14 weeks onwards.

I’m wfh indefinitely so don’t need to tell work yet. I think with local friends, I’ll wait till I see them in person. Find it a bit weird to do the whole “btw I’m pregnant” thing in a message!

Close friends and family knew from the day I peed on the stick but nobody outside of that got told till 5 months.

I told close friends and my mum at 8 weeks and then work colleagues and other people at 12. Not announced it on social media and not planning too , if people don't know I'm pregnant it's because we're not close enough to share it.

I think it very much depends on how you think you would feel about a miscarriage.
I’m very private and would not have wanted to discuss something so personal with anyone except very close friends. I definitely wouldn’t have wanted to tell my family or in laws or colleagues! So I told people as late as I could when I started to show about four months, didn’t make it to the abnormality scan as I’d hoped as I got massive!
It did mean I had to use holiday for MW appointments and scans. Plus I had bleeding and emergency scans which were hard to hide but it suited us.
If you have a family who you would be comfortable talking to about a loss or unhappy news at the screening then tell them before! It’s up to you. Good luck. X

I announced my last one at 32 weeks 😂

We told a few people before the twelve week scan: my MIL because we weren’t sure when we’d see her again in person, my sister as I was including her as an emergency contact on health forms and my best friend, because she was pregnant too! Told rest of immediate family after 12-week scan plus close friends. Told my manager around 14 weeks, people on my immediate team after 20 weeks. After that, I left it to people to realise when they saw the bump - some colleagues hadn’t realised I was pregnant at 34 weeks.

I told my husband at six weeks and everyone else after the 12 week scan, as that tends to be the officially acceptable time to share and the risk of mc is over (although I appreciate a woman could still mc at any stage)

I’ve been going back and forth on social media. On the one hand it’s a nice convenient way to let people who aren’t in our inner circle know, especially since we won’t be seeing them any time soon to tell them in person, but on the other I feel like if I wouldn’t be happy sharing the news of a miscarriage, I also shouldn’t share the news of a pregnancy.

I think that after 12 weeks I will tell the rest of our family and our close friends, and then will see how I feel about making it more widely known. Maybe after the 20 week scan I will feel happier about sharing it more publicly.

I am 9 weeks and have only told my husband and one close friend. Will be telling the parents and siblings after the 12 week scan. I really do want to tell them now and I am not going to be ashamed of any miscarriage. I am just thinking of them at the moment...don't want them to get immensely happy right now if it was to end badly.

I’m 15 weeks with my second. I’ve told hardly anyone. My in-laws don’t even know yet. I’ll probably stay quiet for a while yet. I was the same during my first pregnancy.

We told people pretty much right away. Close family almost as soon as we found out and most others in the next couple of weeks.

Absolutely love how what feels right is so different to everyone!

I guess the first step we'll take is the scan tomorrow and hopefully if everything is ok, we'll have to make a small "game plan" on how we align - maybe I'll wait till the weekend to make any announcements. It's like the longer we've kept it in, the harder it is now to announce and tell the inner circle.

Believe me, I've asked DH that surely the in-laws would keep it all secret if we asked them to, but he's very sure that telling them is like broadcasting it on CNN (not them being malicious or ill-spirited, just terrible at keeping secrets).

Omg how exciting with your scans tomorrow as well @YahBasic @AliSxo !

I was going to wait until 12 weeks but sadly started bleeding today at 9 weeks, so I am quite glad didn’t tell anyone sooner 😔

Husband: the same day.
Perants: 4 weeks
Siblings: 4 weeks
Friends : two the same day, most the weeks following.
Everyone else: will be finding out after our 12 week scan (next week)

I see no point in keeping it a secret personally. I'm pregnant now. That deserves to be celebrated and if I happen to miscarry then that deserves to be acknowledged. I'm also terrible at holding my own water in terms of excitement.

Good luck for your scan today op x

We told immediate families and a couple of close friends pretty much as soon as we found out, operating the 'if we'd tell them about a miscarriage why not tell them now' principal. I also told my line manager and boss at work around 6-7 weeks, because I was very unwell and needed lots of time off and didn't want to lie about why. Again, if I had a miscarriage I would probably have needed someone at work to know rather than trying to struggle through!

We told everyone else (incl. social media post) after our 12 week scan which was at exactly 12 weeks. Our NT measurement was very low and I'm in my late 20s, so even without blood tests coming back I was pretty sure I was going to be low risk. Had NT been higher I probably would have waited for the official results to come back.

I was showing very clearly by 15-16 weeks, even though this is my first baby, so I really couldn't have waited until 20 weeks!

Awww I am so sorry @Waitandsee86 💖

The scan has gone well and couldn't be more textbook. Wriggly curious baby who kept trying to show his face to the sonographers while wiggling his arms and finally allowing them to do the measurements side on.

Though with the 3 HOUR hospital appointment I'm going to tell my line manager today (so she has a bit more context and also so I've got a bit more protection than just being deemed a slacker). Just the thought of announcing it to work is making my blood somersault.

Then I think this weekend we've decided to tell the in-laws (and quickly tell everyone else before they manage to blab 😂).

Immediate family - 7 weeks as it was Christmas
Close friends in person - 12 weeks onwards
Work - 15 weeks onwards, told the bosses and let the news slowly get around
Social media - after a clean bill of health on the 20 week scan