Due August 2020 Thread 2

[cannotmakemymindup]

Hello ladies new thread here for all of us been chatting on thread 1 due in August with our babies!

@NishaaS123 not sure if it'll help much but at my appointment today the midwife said that they are testing everyone (for covid) that's coming in to give birth and so far not one has been positive.

@NishaaS123 I don't know if this will help but I think we all have moments where we freak out. Probably different things for each of us but it's quite natural. The main thing is don't put to much pressure on yourself. The best outcome is always a happy healthy mum and baby.

I had a realisation the other day - I'm now 30 weeks, that means 10 weeks left and three quarters of the way through my pregnancy. I literally was thinking oh my goodness in 10 weeks time I'll have a new baby, I can't even get my head around what'll be like to have a fourth member of our house, a new tiny little person who will have a different personality etc,. We've been a trio for over six years. However we did this once before when I had my daughter, so I can do this again!

This Covid-19 is a little scary, be lying if I didn't acknowledge it. However I try to control the risks that I can and lower them as much as possible. Especially being BAME I'm definitely currently at a very heightened awareness of it. I try to not let it overwhelm me as that won't do any good for me nor my baby. Sorry this turned into a ramble!

Hi @NishaaS123!!
I just wanted to say that you are not alone!! I am 29+1 and I have also been anxious. Especially at the moment with the unprecedented situation we are in with Covid, but the way I’ve been looking at it we just have to trust in ourselves and our bodies and everything will be ok. There is no point in worrying about things we can’t change so I have just focussed on keeping myself and my baby safe in the best way I can. Hopefully if you are still being asked to work your employer has made it safe for you to do so?

I’ve started doing Hypnobirthing which has been an absolute godsend to me in times when I am most anxious. As a first time mum it has given me knowledge so it makes me less scared of the actual birth and also helped me to find a way to relax and calm myself if I do start to feel anxious.

We are all in this together, and I’ve also found this group so helpful in putting my mind at rest when I’m feeling anxious or helping with any questions I have.
Xx

@cannotmakemymindup yeah same trying my best to not think to much about it but it keeps coming to the mind but as you said we just have to leave it and go with the flow just try and take care of yourself as much as possible I have a bbq to attend today which is outdoors but after this I am definitely not leaving the house for anything else gonna try and stay inside as much as I can
And omg yes as the times coming close just cant believe it either in a few weeks there will be a new person in the house and how drastically things will change :D
@Flutterbunny yes you are right this group definitely helps put mind at ease atleast you know you are not alone in this lol yeah I hahe also started to try hypnobirthing hopefully will help put my mind at ease aswell and hopefully we will all get through this safely with happy and healthy babies and mums :D

@NishaaS123 I've definitely had some freak out moments too, you're not alone! I'm also 31 weeks and can feel the countdown. First time mom nerves are hitting hard amd everything going on in the world right now doesn't help but we'll get through it.

I'm definitely starting to fret more now I'm approaching 30 weeks. I'm high risk of developing postpartum depression/psychosis/mania after the birth so I'm worrying more about that than the giving birth especially the lack of sleep during and after labour as that is a huge trigger for me alongside change and hormones. I'm seeing the perinatal mental health team at 31 weeks I'm hoping they will be able to put my mind at ease.

I am definitely swinging between feeling really excited and very very anxious! Starting our NCT course on Monday and hoping that will be reassuring, this group is great for that too!

I know we are all a bit anxious, can I ask if anyone else’s partners have been the same? Our travel system arrived this afternoon, obviously put it together immediately which I found really fun, unfortunately it has had the opposite effect on my husband. I think he’s had a bit of a moment today and realised how much is going to change when baby is here. I don’t really know what to say to reassure him, because he’s absolutely right, everything will change! Any good ideas of how I can calm him down a bit and help him feel less overwhelmed?!

@mable88 anxiety is the worst, sorry to hear your husband is feeling it too. If anything, i wish my other half was in a way, he's very laid back.. pregnant with our first and i don't think he realises what is coming! He's at the 'i don't wanna talk about it anymore, we have already spoken about it' stage 🤦🏼‍♀️ i don't really have any advice for you but all i would say is you're both in it together, you both have eachother to help one another when/if times get tough and you'll get through it!

I'm 30 weeks today, and one minute i'm thinking ffs i just want her out and the next i freak out and think omg birth scares the crap out of me! Lots of worries go through my mind on a daily basis!!

I've felt much calmer since starting NCT, understanding the process of labour better makes me feel more prepared. I'm also reading the practical ways to make your birth better by Siobhan Miller which I'm also finding really helpful.
My DH is very excited, it's me who has a panic! He is very laid back though which I'm helping will keep me calm in labour!

@mable88 I mentioned to OH today that there's a chapter specifically for dads in the book I was reading. He said he'll read it when I go into labor 🤦‍♀️ He is completely unbothered by the idea of having a baby. I love that he can stay calm better than I can but sometimes I wish he would panic just a little bit

@Camia My other half is exactly the same. Just talks about when we have her home - think he thinks labour is just a button we press to eject them, our vagina is like an automatic tennis ball dispenser and hey presto there's the baby 🙄 I've tried to get him to watch the positive birth co section for partners and also the bit about setting the mood with lighting etc- caught him browsing amazon 5 minutes in. He knows I have huge anxiety about giving birth but just says ' I know you can do it' which really isn't helpful and I can't help but be a bit peed off about how dismissive he is.

Oh well, rude awaking for him when I'm mooing like a cow in labour, grabbing him by the neck and telling him to never come near me again 😆

@squashie34 Hilarious! All the mooing and tennis ball dispensing 😂😂😂 i suppose it's because they don't really have to do much right now that they just don't understand, but you wait! I think mine is expecting a spotless house everyday and dinner on the table when he comes in from work as i'd have 'been at home doing nothing' but i'm not sure if it actually works like that.

Nice to see it's seems to a be a man thing to not be bothered just yet. My OH is exactly the same about the whole thing. He's just patiently waiting for his time to shine. Even said the other day that he keeps forgetting I'm preggo and then catching sight of bump and remembering 😂🙈

Maybe I’m being naive but labour doesn’t worry me (yet). At the moment I’m just seeing it as something I have to do to meet my baby. My OH is probably more anxious than me lol! He keeps saying “you don’t know what you’re in for”, & as we are both FTP then we both don’t know. I’m well aware it’s going to be painful, scary etc but as I d never done it before I truly don’t know what to expect & since every labour is different I can’t get myself worked up about what “could” happen. Maybe ignorance is bliss! ☺️

@newmama29 I'm with you on this, I've no idea what labour will be like so not worried about that part. My anxiety lies in the fact in about 11 weeks there will be a little human in my house that needs me 24/7

This thread has made me laugh out loud this morning - it’s reassuring to hear that my OH is no different, like many of you have said it must be a man thing.
My OH is just so laid back about the whole thing - I feel like he’s been going through the motions with me but that’s his limit...
He fell asleep during our Zoom Hypnobirthing session last week for all to see - I had to nudge him awake and the course tutor commented on how “relaxed” he looked - it was mortifying!
X

@JMill13 yes this is more where my anxiety lies! I trust that midwives etc will get me through my labour, but what happens when I’m allowed home with a newborn baby? What do you do with it? How do you know something is wrong? I’m relying on pure instinct & my mum 🙈😂

@newmama29 glad I'm not the only one. Though people have been doing it all over the world for billions of years so the logical part of my brain knows we'll be okay but the illogical side is stronger 😂 I'm still stuck on figuring out what a baby sleeps in prior to fitting into a sleeping bag if it's not allowed blankets.

@JMill13 I've had that too, mine just keeps hinting that i'm getting fat 🤦🏼‍♀️ i'm not painting a very good picture of him haha. Wish i could be more like you though, anxiety through the roof sometimes!

@JMill13 yes this is what gets me through too! I’ve bought a few sleeping bags as I feel more comfortable about them than swaddling. Can they not go in a sleeping bag from birth?

Sleeping bags are fine but the ones sized 0-6 months you might find are too big at first. The thing to look out for is the neck hole, if it's too big that their head could go through then wait a bit till their a bit bigger.

This is the kind of thing I used from birth to about 3 months. My boy liked to be swaddled so these were perfect. I couldn't get the hang of swaddling with a blanket so found these Velcro ones amazing and so easy. But all babies are different, I bought them before he was born so was a bit of a gamble but they worked for us.

@Newmama29 sorry for the delay in replying 😬
A tens machine is a little handheld device which has pads connected to it which you stick to your back and when you press a button it sends electrical pulses to the pads. I hired mine and I'd hire one again if can this time. It's more of a distraction from the pain and you press the button each time a contraction starts so it sort of gives you something to focus on. I've found out recently you can hire them from amazon but I hired mine from my local children's centre.

@Luna321 that’s great thanks for that information! I have some of the swaddling blankets that you’ve posted about as a friend has given me them so that’s good to know☺️ The tens machine also sounds really interesting, I’m going to look into that! I’ll try anything! I take it you can’t use them if you’re induced? I have this thing in my head that I’m adamant I’m going to need an induction 🤦🏼‍♀️

@oldestchild90 oh thankfully no hints of my oh hinting at me getting fat, he knows better 😂. It's weird though cause I'm natural an anxious person, like I have really bad anxiety in every day life, since being pregnant it's the least I think I've been anxious in my entire life. I'd imagine it'll properly hit me just before I pop.

@newmama29 I don't even know, my friend told me sleeping bags from about 8weeks but I haven't a clue. I've bought a couple of the Tommy tippee ones in a couple of different sizes so hopefully they fit okay.

@luna321 oh thank you. I was actually looking at the velcro swaddle things on amazon on the other day and wasn't sure whether to get them or not but think I will purchase a pack now.

Hi all. Ive only just found you. Im 30 weeks today with my first. Im 35yrs young. ( feels like a dating app speech apart ftim thd 30 weeks preg thing lol)
Ive had a relatively uncomplicated 1st and 2nd trimesters. Feeling very anxious in this last bit though. Plus moving is now hard and cant bend to tie shoes lol i feel gigantic! Has anyone had their whooping cough vaccine? I havent been offered one yet and i am consious time is ticking i may phone and chase this on monday. Also has everyone had antenatal classes and how has this worked through lockdown. I havent heard anythink about them yet.

Its great this forum seems to be so many supportive and hilarious people here!