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Original poster

Upset about having to wear a mask during labour

122 replies

Peridotty · 14/05/2020 22:51

I am upset about having to wear a surgical mask during labour and my husband has to as well! :( We are in the US.
I won't be able to see my husband's face the whole time or expression when the baby is born! It's our first. I don't think I can take it off at all during the time I am in hospital. Upset about potentially having photos taken with baby with mask on and also the fact that the first thing baby will see are our masked faces :(

OP posts:

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Original poster

Peridotty · 14/05/2020 23:24

If I refused to wear a mask, maybe they would leave the room and withdraw care? Or demanding that I do.
They didn't allow any partners in with them in NY for a few days and that was supposedly against human rights.
The hospital policy is 'in any clinical setting' so I think they will be strict on women in labour too... they aren't as nice as in the UK.

OP posts:

Original poster

Peridotty · 14/05/2020 23:27

Everyone over the age of 2 years old has to wear a mask by law... it is probably hard to enforce a toddler to wear one, but all the same they could fine you if they don't!

OP posts:

Grobagsforever · 14/05/2020 23:30

OP, I say this gently, honestly.

You'll be fine. It's just a mask, the baby won't care that you are wearing a mask, and it's not ok to be precious about photos during a global pandemic, it's actually a little disrespectful of the nurses to worry about such trivia.

I say this as someone who gave birth in far worse circumstances. Truly you are stressing about nothing.

LouiseTrees · 14/05/2020 23:31

I just read the whole state law. Arguably you could say that you struggle to breathe with it on though during labour? That’s one of the allowed medical exceptions. I would try and discuss with your midwife in advance. Doesn’t help your husband though.

1300cakes · 14/05/2020 23:40

I would not worry about this as it really doesn't seem realistic. How are you going to vomit or take sips of water. Not allowed drink water even if your labour takes days? Not allowed to eat after giving birth? Slipping it down to do these things makes wearing it pointless.

Many people in labour take all their clothes off as they find them impossibly annoying, most women would just rip the mask off and wouldn't be able to help themselves.

And if they are worried about things coming out of you.. ummm... have they forgotten that blood, pee, poo, amneotic fluid and a baby will be coming out? Are you going to wear a mask over your vagina as well?

HoneyBee03 · 14/05/2020 23:48

What will they do, force it onto your face? They aren't going to just leave you to give birth on your own. I'd just refuse, no way would I be able to wear a mask giving birth.

Also cracking up at the idea of putting a mask on my toddler. What on earth is going on over there?

Original poster

Peridotty · 14/05/2020 23:49

Thank you for your replies!!
@LouiseTrees thank you!! I will prob say I can't tolerate the mask!!

@1300cakes I did a Lamaze class and I believe they like to give women IV drips instead of food and water in the US?? I am not sure if that is what I am about to face but I don't plan on starving myself during labour

@Grobagsforever I know it's to protect the healthcare workers too. I just feel upset that I wouldn't get to see the smile or the emotions of my husband when the baby is born- I was really looking forward to that.

OP posts:

indemMUND · 14/05/2020 23:51

My Dsis gave birth without her partner in an operating room full of people wearing masks, very high risk and just escaped a hysterectomy or haemorrhage that would have landed her in ICU with the Covid patients. Last week. At a hospital that has been failing for years. She was very, very lucky. I'm aware that it's hard all over and it's not a competition. I wish you the best of luck.

timeisnotaline · 14/05/2020 23:54

I vomited every 20 minutes during labour. Relax op, If you do take it off you wouldn’t pay the fine and would happily take it to court and say I was struggling to breathe or I was vomiting (if true). Just tell your partner if you are vomiting can he try and note down how often and get it in the doctors notes (afterwards, not interrupt them during!)
Zero concern about the baby seeing you with a mask, they will know it’s you from smell and touch and voice, they won’t have a clue what they are seeing. You could wear a scream mask and baby think oooh there she is my mummy person.

Original poster

Peridotty · 14/05/2020 23:56

@timeisnotaline
You could wear a scream mask and baby think oooh there she is my mummy person

hahaha thank you for cheering me up with that picture

OP posts:

Crabbo · 14/05/2020 23:57

@1300cakes

Haha yes I was thinking that about bodily fluids as well - what on earth is the point in making you cover your face given everything else that comes out of you all over the bed, floor, anyone standing nearby...

Original poster

Peridotty · 14/05/2020 23:57

@indemMUND

glad your sister and her baby is ok! How frightening!!

OP posts:

midwestsummer · 15/05/2020 00:05

Honestly OP you may just find your DH very annoying and irrelevant while giving birth.

As long as you get to leave the hospital with a healthy baby you will have done great and will have all the time at home to take lovely family photos.

Hospital lighting isn't flattering and giving birth isn't the most beautifying experience.
Good luck with it all.

SquidgyPeach · 15/05/2020 00:09

I don't think it is unreasonable to think of yourself when it comes to your own birth experience atall either. You will be in a private room labouring with just your husband and a midwife presumably? Really it warrants little need to enforce you to wear a mask.

It is not precious to be concerned about this, I would not be very happy about it either based on the fact that medically it is not good for you to labour whilst wearing a mask!

Being comfortable during your birth is important, forcing someone to do something is not going to make them comfortable and I don't think it's really much of a health risk if you're in a private room!

1300cakes · 15/05/2020 00:10

they like to give women IV drips instead of food and water in the US??

Sometimes we get drips here as well for various reasons but you'll still want to take sips of water or suck ice chips to wet your mouth.

Seriously do not worry about this. If they mention it to you at an appointment just smile and nod. Then just see how things go on the day.

I'm not a midwife but I am a nurse and I wouldn't put a mask on a patient who might vomit (an extremely common thing in labour). It's dangerous as the patient could aspirate the fluid (get in in to their lungs).

Hagisonthehill · 15/05/2020 00:20

In uk.masks for women and partners for csection due to covid as a precaution.
Most people appreciate it's in everyone's best interest.Gas and air for spinal if labour has started is using anaesthetic mask too so many problem there.

ChanklyBore · 15/05/2020 00:30

I was looking forward to the emotions of my DH when my first was born too OP. When it came to it I gave birth on my own, and I am actually really happy I did and much prefer it that way. The emotions are still there to be felt and observed and shared and bonded over a few days later when fewer disposable internal organs are coming out of your vagina and you can concentrate a little more on the awesome human you have created rather than the shrieking that you know is coming from somewhere...but where??

DamnYankee · 15/05/2020 00:37

procedural or surgical mask

Giving birth isn't really a procedure. I can see it if you need a c-section. My DH had to wear one during my c-sec, but no-one was breathing hard, obviously. (!)
I needed oxygen after the c-section and found it hard to tolerate that. I kept getting scolded for "letting it slip."

I'd confirm this is true before getting too upset.

It would be nice if we had so many tests, we could test women 2-3 weeks before due date and then ask them to quarantine...I realize that wouldn't work for everyone...babies come early, babies come late...

I'm sending you lots of positive vibes for an uncomplicated birth and healthy baby!

Emberfoot · 15/05/2020 01:38

Erff I feel for you though, I had to wear one the other day, but with the morning sickness still going at wk34, I threw up inside a minute with it on. Idk how I'd manage labour with it 🤢

Designerenvy · 15/05/2020 01:45

In the scheme of things, wearing a mask isn't a huge ask really.
Healthcare workers need to be protected to be able to continue to care for you , your baby and others .
You will see your partners eyes, the eyes are the window to the soul ! You will see his emotions.

ArthurandJessie · 15/05/2020 01:49

I think your being a bit extra, I'm in north america too may be in the same boat when I give birth next week but you know what if it keeps everyone safe I'll do it ! Some women in the world have to give birth in war zones we are being asked to wear a mask ....

timeisnotaline · 15/05/2020 02:08

Again don’t want you to be disappointed. Maybe your husband will be amazing but maybe all his face would tell you is HOLY FUCK. THAT CAME OUT OF .. THAT!! AND ITS COVERED IN STUFF. AND BLOOD. THERES BLOOD.

Amanduh · 15/05/2020 02:19

Sounds horrible OP, but hope it’s not as bad as you think in the end. Oh and to those talking about UK, I’m in the UK and had a section on Saturday, did not have to wear a mask!

Zombiemum1946 · 15/05/2020 02:28

Your baby won't be able to see it and will rely on sound and smell more than anything else. As for photos,there are millions who had masks on for other reasons and it will be a signature of millions of 2020 baby photos. In the UK, if all is well, you can be out of hospital within hours of giving birth and take first pics at home. Healthy baby and healthy you is the most important thing to focus on. It's just a precaution, try to look past it.

LadyDoc1 · 15/05/2020 02:44

In labour I imagine that the mask will be one of the last things you think about!
I can't comment on US laws, certainly as law applies in the U.K. it would be an assault for a clinician to touch you to insist you wear one without your consent. I can't imagine any law enforcement would want to be involved in imposing restrictions on a woman in a delivery suite!
Wishing the best for you and new member of your family

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