Unplanned pregnancy dilemma

[henni85]

Long post - but responses would be very welcome

Hope this is the right place to post. I had a Mirena coil fitted in December 2019, all good or so I thought until I started feeling very ‘off’ and took a pregnancy test - BFP.

I think I’m very early, 4-5 weeks based on last time I bled. I’ve only been with my boyfriend 6 months, I’m 35 and my boys are 16 and 13. I have health problems. I had surgery in January for Crohn’s disease. My boyfriend is a veteran and has many health conditions as a result.

We really did not want children. He is obviously concerned and thinks a termination would be the best option. I’m concerned about the coil - whether it’s still in situ, has it come out, chance of ectopic? I don’t know if my body can handle pregnancy. I really don’t know if I can bring up another child

My head says this pregnancy is such a bad idea, but my heart says otherwise. I have had several miscarriages (years ago with previous partner) and the pain never goes away.

I don’t know what answers I’m looking for, but needed to get this all off my chest.

Sorry for your previous losses

Could you contact BPAS or Marie Stopes to ask about some counselling (by phone I guess) to talk through your options and feelings with someone impartial? I think that would help you to decide.

Personally I would terminate for all these reasons:
"I’ve only been with my boyfriend 6 months, I’m 35 and my boys are 16 and 13. I have health problems. I had surgery in January for Crohn’s disease. My boyfriend is a veteran and has many health conditions as a result."
However it's your choice and you have to do what feels right for you.

Good luck

PS I advise you to get this moved to the Pregnancy Choices board.

Really sorry about your previous miscarriages but based on what you have said, it sounds like there are many good reasons to not proceed with this pregnancy.

You need to start with medical care. Tell them you are pregnant with a mirena coil and get checked out ASAP. You need to know if this is a viable or potentially dangerous pregnancy.