What happens after giving birth? What was your experience?

[mrsc1987]

As a FTM i was wondering late last night what actually happens when you go to a ward after giving birth? Do they show you how to feed and how often and how to change the baby and leave you to it or do they come and help several times?
Is there a kitchen to get babys bottles (if not breastfeeding) do they come around often and give help and advice? What actually happens? What were your experiences if you're not a FTM?

I hope you don't regret asking, OP?! I think the broad message is that support is there (well, mostly) but you really do have to ask for it, and sometimes repeatedly. I found it traumatic because I think I was expecting Mary Poppins to fly in and tell me how clever I was, while bringing me endless cups of tea and marvelling at the wonderous miracle of life. Instead I got perfectly pleasant, but obviously overworked staff flitting about, never quite having enough time to look me in the eyes and see that I was struggling.

The take-home message is ask for help when you need it, no matter how often you need it.

No i don't regret asking I'd rather be prepared for the worst and have a nice surprise if it turns out much better. Fully prepared to learn on the job just hoping as a first timer they might help me some. Im not planning to BF because i dont want to but have the pre prepped bottles now as seen that they'll be easier for me to sort out. I know I'll be in for 24-48 hr due to GD and having to keep an eye on babys sugars

I had the kindest midwife on my ward. There were 4 first time mums in the ward and she showed us all as a group how to bath the babies. She also used to dim the ward lights in the late afternoon, stripped off the babies and tucked them in beside you for skin to skin and sprinkled essential oils on your pillow so you could rest and cuddle your baby. No one was allowed to disturb the ward. DS is 13 and I still remember the relief of that quiet peaceful time in amongst the chaos. She was just lovely. Also received lots of help with feeding and when I was exhausted on night 2 they took him away for a few hours so I could sleep.

@mrsc1987 I had DD at 6.30pm and left the hospital at about 8am the next day so you might not be in that long. They take a sugar level pretty much straight away, then middle of the night and the next morning. As long as they're all ok you can leave pretty sharpish.

Thats good to know, i was told to prepare for up to 24-48 hours but with the this covid stuff going on im hoping it'll be earlier as long as my baby is ok obviously, being a ftm is scary as heck i was not prepared for this.

I gave birth at 11.50pm but had to go to theatre after due to my placenta being stuck. It was about 3.30am when I got moved to
A private room and my husband was able to stay the whole time (10 months ago
So pre covid) a couple of
Student midwives came round to make sure we were ok And make me some toast but we pretty much got left to Our own devices. We stayed all the next day and night and left at 11am the following day. They came and checked baby but as first time
Parents we did feel very alone. I bottle fed and took pre made bottles, my baby was only 5lb and barely managed 25ml in an entire day at first and no one seemed concerned lol.

Private room. No one showed me anything. Had to beg to see a doctor to be discharged but they were all too busy so I sat about waiting until a doctor could finally do the checks. I imagine right now things are quite differently though and I think they're trying to get you in and out ASAP for the health of everyone concerned.
Sounds like you're doing a good job though trying to learn things before hand. I had no idea.

I had an EMCS and was transferred to a postnatal ward of four beds seperster by curtains. My bed had a mattress that was too big for it so it dipped in in the middle 🤦‍♀️ God knows why I didn't say something. Having just had surgery and strapped to a pressure cuff one side and an IV the other on a bed that dipped in, they announced visiting time was over and I was like oh no you don't. My partner pressed the buzzer to ask someone to come so I was in some sort of position to get to the baby if he started crying and twenty minutes later someone finally turned up. First thing she said to my partner was "you shouldn't still be here" - I was seriously not impressed.

But they did get better through the night. The nurse took my LB for a few hours so I could get some sleep and took a picture of my scar on her phone so I could have a nosey. They were really down to early with advice and what not. I live in an area that is fortunate to have an awful lot of BFing support in place with an in hospital team linked to a community team so someone came round to see me in the morning when I asked to give advice as my LB had latched well in recovery but was then just too sleepy to latch since. I was discharged after 26 hours to go home and the BFing support called me then next day to check everything way okay and came out to offer assistance on day 4.

I did not however get tea and toast. I actually got nothing the entire evening after I had had the section (baby born at 2.50 and on the ward by 5.30). Hunger hit me at 2am and I found a KitKat in my bag and it was the best thing every, but I think no food was a massive oversight on the hospitals behalf. Unless there was a breakfast room which litrally this is the first I have heard of it on this thread. I'm going to ask my MW next week if there was because I survived on a croissant and snacks for the 26 hours I was in as the food they brought round to us was utterly vile.

Food was a major issue for me too. I couldn't have got to the kitchen if I'd wanted to and the evening meal was vile.

This time round I'm packing a bloody picnic! Most of my hospital bag will be sandwiches 🤗

The majority of the experiences here are pretty horrid. I am FTM and very nervous about the whole giving birth experience. TBH i wasn't expecting this at all but it is best not to put my hopes high and if i have a pleasant experience to be a bonus.
Hopes all goes well for you OP.

I think I was amazingly lucky with food. The hospital catering was surprisingly good, there was a trolley that came to the ward with hot and cold food for every mealtime, none of this filling in cards that you get now and nursing mums were told to take an extra sandwich with the evening meal so you had something to eat during the night.
Plus my DH was convinced that the food would be inedible so was also bringing me gourmet sandwiches

I had a severe haemorrhage so I was put in a room with 4 beds I was first in but as the night went in 3 other mums came in from emergency sections. At the beginning they did keep checking on me but as the ward got busier it was difficult even getting paracetamol so thank god I packed my own after everything they had to do to me in theatre 🥴

Honestly though thats why you have your buzzer any questions just buzz and ask!! That is what they are there for.

If your not breastfeeding you need to take in a pack of ready made bottles you can get them in the supermarkets (UK)

Both my stays were generally very positive.

I had sections (planned) and was wheeled round to the ward about an hour after surgery finished. For the first night, I wasn't allowed a private room as they like to keep section patients in a 4 bedded room near the midwives desk to keep a better eye on us. The first time there was one other women's there, the second time j was the only one. They were happy for me to have a curtain round for privacy and I always felt I was treated with dignity and respect.

I choose my meals in advance, and they were pretty good. Not restaurant standard, but certainly canteen standard.they sometimes snuck my husband some food which was nice but obviously I didn't ask for this. My meals were brought to me on a tray and collected, and j was offered the occasional cup of tea, refilling of my water jug etc.

With my first baby I was by myself overnight (husband stayed the second time) and they did nappy changes overnight, and were on hand if I needed them. Generally though you were left to it unless you pressed the buzzer (I asked for baby to be handed to me so I could do nappy, but they did it themselves to help...)

Then I have a private room for the second night. I could have gone home after the first but thought it best to err on the side of caution and it was a pleasant environment to be in.

My only complaint is that the drugs rounds are poorly timed for people who are likely to be up at night, and (I suspect) based on not wanting to disturb people during the night - being told we could ask for drugs during the night would have been helpful.