What happens after giving birth? What was your experience?

[mrsc1987]

As a FTM i was wondering late last night what actually happens when you go to a ward after giving birth? Do they show you how to feed and how often and how to change the baby and leave you to it or do they come and help several times?
Is there a kitchen to get babys bottles (if not breastfeeding) do they come around often and give help and advice? What actually happens? What were your experiences if you're not a FTM?

Wow thanks guys I'm so nervous about learning to change the baby and knowing when to feed etc i think I'll practice with a teddy bear and also ask my midwife at the next appointment if she could show me. Wish i had taken more notice when friends changed their babies now lol

Honestly awful. Left to it. Discharged myself at 11pm because I couldn’t take another night! Got home and with nice home, food and support from dh and dm breastfed for 7 months. They sent the health visitor round sharpish though!

I was offered a sandwich and that was it.
When the baby cried I rang my bell as I'd has a spinal block as my after birth hadnt come away so had been to theatre..I couldnt get up so nurse had to hand me the baby so I could breast feed.

Next morning they brought me breakfast in bed as I'd given birth late night before. After that I was left to get on with it.

It wasnt a nice experience until late day 2 a little elderly lady came to see me and said she was helping out voluntary if I needed anything to shout. I said can u help me Im a FTM and I feel very overwhelmed and abit scared. She was amazing and showed me how to wash him change his nappy even hd him. I literally cried with relief. The nurses were just too busy. After day 3 I had to ask to go home...it was so noisey in there I needed my own bed.

That was a few years ago now so it may have changed

I had a brilliant time, don’t believe all the horror stories.

So you think the rest of us are intentionally lying in order to scare the OP? Because you had a brilliant time and therefore no one else's experience could possibly have differed from that?

Jesus these stories are terrifying. Due in 3 weeks, first baby and with covid around I've had no antenatal classes and DH won't be allowed to stay. I really hope I get some help after the birth unlike 90% of the poor people here. I've never changed a nappy!

@Lemonysherbert you can sign up to online antenatal classes and find NHS tutorials for pretty much anything that worries you. And I did have to watch a few videos before I left (mostly a weird, repetitive one about not shaking the baby, but I think it mentioned bathing in there too). But tbh, nappies are dead easy. Buy a pack and practice on a teddy bear. Use cotton wool and water to wipe (the baby, not the teddy bear!) Front to back for a girl. One swipe then bin, get a new one.

www.nowbabylive.co.uk/course-list

Just googled it for you, Lemony, this online course is £10 a session and starts tomorrow.

You can always search for YouTube videos for things like bathing your baby, but look for official sources, like NHS videos.

How did you all manage to get private rooms?? I had to share with 7 others for 4 nights and it was hellish.
In my experience, they come to see you every so often. They do routine checks on baby and want to watch you feed every so often. There's a buzzer if you need support.

Totally forgot to say, if you have allergies or sensitivity to medication make sure you tell them and check your meds. Despite them asking my allergies and dob etc every time meds came round they still prescribed me what I am allergic to and wanted to send me home with it too. My dh got a bit cranky!

Try not to be daunted, there will be good and bad experiences with everything but you aren't likely to be in too long and just ask for help without feeling a burden (pain relief or help feeding etc)

Good luck

How did you all manage to get private rooms??

I can't speak for the others, but I asked and paid £60 for the privilege.

Currently searching YouTube for every video imaginable! Hopefully with the current situation they will help us out more knowing our partners cant be on the ward to help us out and we havent had classes (furloughed so penny pinching a bit so cant pay for them atm) Ive read you even have to take your baby to the loo with you in some cases? Feeling super anxious about what could happen but I'm also trying to just take a whatever happens happens approach

Firstly you'll get the best toast and cup of tea you've ever tasted seriously I don't know what they do to it but it's amazing (if they still do that!) with mine they showed me how to do the first bottle and they kept checking in to make sure we were ok and asking how much milk he'd had, asked if I needed showing how do do a nappy show you where to shower etc and they leave you to rest/sit up looking at the baby in amazement! Good luck OP

The baby cots are on wheels so taking them places isn't an issue. No idea if you have to take them with you to the loo- I didn't, but I had an en suite attached to my room so felt OK leaving the baby there with the door open.

I got taught to bath baby, which was really handy as it's TERRIFYING. Apart from that I only remember me and the other woman on the ward just staring at our babies looking shellshocked.

I had my other three at home.

I was in a private room and stayed there for a few days as my son had trouble feeding. We had a private 'how to bathe baby' lesson while I was there and there was a group thing going on that I went to but I had him at 1:43am had to be stitch up and then had the toast and slept and this session was at something like 8am and it was only a few doors down from my room as I was near the end, so I went but was so out of it still I have no idea what It was about 😂🙈 they asked me how old baby was and I said 1 day (as I had slept) when he was more like 6 hours 😂. I would have looked awful 😂 all I remember is the mum opposite me looked bloody amazing and had a full face of makeup.

Oh and the drug trolley came round all the time but I never had any. And there was a tea room but i never went in i was just brought stuff 😂🙈 I enjoyed being there tbh

Just seen your post. My loo was directly opposite my room a few steps away so didn't have to take baby with me. Hopefully you will be lucky and get a private room. I was induced in mine and they kept me there i have no idea where the other woman on the wards even were.

@Broohaha sometimes it's just luck, I did with my first it was amazing big double bed proper tv loads of room, I think back now and wish I hadn't pushed to go home straight away!! 2nd baby didn't actually leave the delivery room as it was quiet, had the baby chilled out in the delivery room for a while then went home, 3rd and 4th I was on a ward.

We were completely left to get on with it. I was breastfeeding and had to press the buzzer a couple of times in the night as I just couldn't get baby to latch - midwives took a while to come and see me and were clearly very busy so help was brief and limited. YouTube was my friend.

If formula feeding, you were expected to provide your own premade formula - the newborn bottles that come with teat seemed most popular as there are no facilities to warm/sterilise here.

No help being shown how to change a nappy or bath baby etc. Our trust expect you to get on with it. Similarly with the food situation in our area - the food trolley comes to the end of the ward and you have to go and get your food. I missed breakfast on the first day as I was mid feed with baby and they wont wait or bring it to you. I got hubby to bring me in some bits after that to make sure I didnt go hungry!

Can't edit my original post but should add - I WAS brought very regular cups of tea and jugs of water which was lovely.

First time round I'd had a traumatic birth ending in an EMCS and a mw sat with me in recovery the whole time, she helped DS latch on etc.

On the ward they were concerned that baby wasn't getting enough milk so brought a pump so they could measure it. Nobody told me that it's normal to only have a few ml of colostrum at a time though.

I ended up being in for 5 days. The only practical help anyone gave me was the nursery nurse who took us along the corridor to bath the babies. That was really helpful.

Second time round I was literally just left to get on with it, despite the fact I'd had another section. At one point I was pacing the corridors with DS2 at 2am having had no sleep & was exhausted by a baby who was determined to chew my nipples off! By 3am I was sat on my bed eating a box of malteasers because I was starving. It was quite depressing tbh.

I'm expecting number three now & I'm planning to take more food & some nipple shields so I'm fully prepared. I'm also going to ask about a private room because some people are so loud and inconsiderate it's unreal.

I'm one of the few people that thinks not having visitors on the wards will be a bloody marvellous thing.

I won’t tell you my experience as that won’t help at all. But go in and try to stay positive, even if you can’t ask for help or things are going a bit wrong. At the end of this you’ll have a baby, and we all make mistakes, but in my experience you just know when to feed. My son went straight for the boob and didn’t leave for a few days, but even if someone else was holding him he’d go towards their chest and start sucking.
Nappies are simpler than you might think. Bring snacks and sport drinks (I brought in like 6), like plenty of snacks if you’re allowed. Eat before you go in. And even if it’s bad just remember you hopefully won’t be there forever...
as for me, after it i might as well have it tattooed on my forehead that i will never have babies again and despite having a mad sex drive the thought of going back to the maternity ward I haven’t had sex since he was born.

My hospital was amazing !! They supported me 100%. It’s all a bit fuzzy now ( a year ago) but I was constantly asked when the last time baby had nursed and peed/pooped and they showed me everything to do . I was in the hospital for 3 nights and needed help nursing nearly every time and I had a midwife by my side for every feed .

If I remember correctly my first day I didn’t need to ask for help , they were just there showing me everything. After that it was mostly up to me to ask . There is a button you can press and a midwife comes to your room .

After my first emergency csection I had so much help with breastfeeding, all meals brought to me, and an experienced nurse came in and showed all of us how to bath them etc.

With second I was in a private room after planned section and got all meals brought to me but I was left too it as I already knew about breastfeeding as I was still feeding dd1 who was 18 months!i got discharged after 3 days and a quick check over me and baby

With my 3rd planed section in aug 2019 I was in a ward but it was just me all other beds were empty. After I showed them my latch I never really seen a nurse etc until next day for checks etc. Then next morning I was home. I showered my self as soon as catheter was removed,got dressed and done my hair and done all nappy changes etc

This was in Scotland and midwifes an nurses were all lovely but the more babies you have the less help you get x

I was left to it. I'd been helped to BF in recovery, I'd needed forceps in theatre I case I then needed a section.

I changed my first ever nappy at 4am completely on my own, it's rely not that hard though, I had waterwipes as its much easier than cotton wool and water. The ward was roasting and had the usual inconsiderate neighbours along with their visitors, but I've heard much worse stories than what I went through. The food wasn't great, so may be take a peek to see what other options there are in the main areas of the hospital to purchase!