Early pregnancy nerves

[MadameDePompadour]

Hello
I’m sorry I know questions have prob been asked and answered like this before but I’m hoping for some advice from more experienced ladies.
I am pregnant For the 2nd time (5 weeks) following an ectopic in October when I lost my right FP. That was my first pregnancy.
I’m feeling v anxious about this especially as I have twinges now on my left side. I’m scared of another ectopic, and of Coronavirus and everything else it seems!
I have struggled to get through to my local EPU to get the early scan I know I need. I’m on DR google quite a lot and I don’t think I’m handling my nerves very well. Looking for negative signs all the time and assuming the worst which I know isn’t helpful.
Can anyone advise how they coped with the nerves of early pregnancy / strategies they found effective? Are twinges and cramps on one side a very bad sign Or usual? Any help or advice much appreciated.

Hi @MadameDePompadour,

I am 5 weeks today (also on my second pregnancy), and I had the very same cramping on the left side off and on yesterday evening.

Equally as nervous as you are, following a MMC at 7 wks on my first pregnancy (this time last year). But I understand that the cramping is related to stretching of uterus. I believe there is only cause for concern if the pain is severe (ie doubled over). I don't have these cramps today (replaced by a light headache that won't lift), and I don't believe its anything to worry about. Keep an eye and if they get worse then do see your doc, but I've a feeling you don't need to worry. Let me know how you are getting on. x

I'm 6 weeks and very nervous I've had an early loss and a late loss last year so hoping everything goes ok this time. I always get left side pain, I think it's normal to get pain on one side as everything is moving. Xxx

@AlviesMam Sorry to hear about your losses last year. You're understandably nervous. I think the only thing we can do is keep positive and take it day by day. Glad you've also had the unusual left side pain. Realising more and more it's totally normal! Xx

@AnxiousLady1 when I was pregnant last time I had quite a lot of left side pain and it turned out to be a corpus luteum cyst which was cause by hormones and it's actually a good sign to have one as it's let's off hormones to keep the pregnancy going and that's what caused the pain! Xx

@AlviesMam That's definitely good to know! I think we're inevitably going to read into every little detail at this stage, aren't we? Much as I tell myself not to!

@AnxiousLady1 I know :( I've not had much symptoms today and I'm panicking about that! X

@AlviesMam That was going to be my next question! Do you find your symptoms fluctuate? As I do? For instance my boobs feel relatively okay in the morning but get sore as day goes on. The bloated feeling progresses throughout day too. It always worries me a little when I wake up and think I can't feel symptoms. All this afternoon I've had a mild headache, and the bloated feeling came on in last couple hours. Assume that's all normal. But this morning I was thinking "where's the symptoms" after an evening with left side cramping! I don't know how anyone does this without totally losing their minds. xx

@AnxiousLady1
I've not had sore boobs at all yet! But weird enough that's always been my first sign... if I didn't have sore boobs I knew I was pregnant if I had sore boobs I knew it was period! Haha but I've not had any sickness and I've not really felt that sick? I've just had tiredness , a few twinges and lots of gas! The odd headache. But overall no strong symptoms! I keep telling myself your pregnant stop panicking! And I'm trying to be so calm but I just wish I had some bad symptoms to keep me reassured haha but after reading up it seems like a few of us don't have that many symptoms! How many weeks are you? Xx

@AlviesMam I'm 5 weeks today. I actually took the test a couple of days before my period was due, as I noticed in work that my boobs hurt and I was peeing at least every hour. I didn't want to be symptom spotting so I took a test when I got home to check and it was positive. The boob soreness isn't bad (I know some people get really sore). It's just enough for me to notice. Usually that's when I'm walking or when I go to bed at night. The peeing is consistent during the day but I'm not having to get up through the night with it. Other than that I've the vivid dreams and intermittent cramping and bloating. Was thinking last couple of days I'd a funny taste in my mouth, but that was mild and I might be symptom spotting! And today was the never ending headache. But everything I've listed in terms of "symptoms" is mild. Like you, I'm equally wishing for something more obvious. I know last time around the nausea started around week 6. Although I wasn't as sure of my dates then (ie I thought I was 7 weeks and had a scan and was told I was actually 5weeks3).

@AnxiousLady1 I didn't get my positive test until 9 days late! Which made me think that I ovulated late! So not 100% sure on my dates. I got a blood test and hcg levels were positive and high :)

I'm not going to get an early scan I'm going to just wait it out and have the mind set of what will be will be! I feel more sicky after eating or on an evening. I am totally with you on the vivid dreams!

I don't think my boobs hurt until around 10 weeks last time (I had a late miscarriage at 22 weeks) I'm constantly trying to compare my symptoms to last time but I know every pregnancy can be different. I'm getting twinges as we speak which is comforting. Roll on 12 weeks! Xx

Congratulations! Twinges and even pains can very normal. I had an ectopic pregnancy before I had my DS, now 1. I'll be honest with you, I didn't enjoy my pregnancy at all after my ectopic. I worried about every single twinge and cramp, I had a little bleed early on too. every time something happened, I thought oh no, somethings wrong!
I got an early scan which confirmed he was in the right place, you'd think that would make me less stressed and anxious, but it didn't.
My advice would be to truly try to embrace and enjoy your pregnancy as much as you can. Good luck 😊

@AlviesMam The only reason I'm more sure of my dates was because I used LH tests last month to work out when I was ovulating. But I know a couple of months ago my cycle was randomly longer, so it's possible you have just ovulate a little later than usual.

Did you just ask your GP for a blood test? That's definitely good news on the HCG levels! I was back and forth today trying to decide whether to get an early scan next week. More to ensure everything is in right place and moving along. But it may be too early, and I know there was a heartbeat last time at 5weeks3 and then nothing after 7weeks1, so an early scan would only reassure me for a day or two.

So sorry to hear about your late loss especially. I cannot begin to imagine how hard that was.

I've resolved, for now, to try and stay in the positive and not look too far forward. I think chatting on forums like this is a much saner way to deal with worrying thoughts, rather than googling.

Glad you're getting the twinges now. I'm properly bloated this eve. But I have just drank a hot chocolate (which probably didnt help) and put on a facemask. Figured being kind to myself was one way of dealing with the stress. Do the same! Xxx

@AnxiousLady1 my consultant said to me and early scan will only reassure you for that moment. She said let Mother Nature do what it needs to do and wait until 12 weeks -so im taking her advice haha! I had an early private scan last time and seen a heartbeat but the hospital said to be careful with private scans as they don't use the same equipment as hospitals. (Alvie had a severe heart defect) she said this probably wasn't the cause but to be careful of radiation and to not get an early scan if it can be helped. I think if the baby wasn't in the right place we'd know about it by now! Think positive!
I booked an appointment due to getting faint positive on the day AF was due as I was worried about chemical or ectopic but the day of my appointment I got the strongest positive ever! I still asked my doctor for a hcg test due to My history and my levels were great at 1800 which really reassured me.

One sided pain is completely normal so don't be thinking about ectopic and I'm sure if you have no heavy bleeding/clots you will be fine- although if your a worrier like me you will probably worry about a MMC!! My first loss was a MMC which could make me worry this time around but I'm honestly trying so hard not to let that fear spoil my happiness now!

We have a few symptoms, no pain, no heavy bleeding/clots I think things look pretty good for us right now!

Love having you all to vent and chat too I don't know how Id have gotten through my late miscarriage If it wasn't for Mumsnet xxxxx

Thanks for sharing your experiences everyone. I’m sorry they haven’t always been positive for all of us, but it’s really good to be able to share them and get advice. My symptoms (nausea and tiredness mainly) do seem to fluctuate a bit which is nerve wracking. I do feel like I’m going a little bit crazy atm! I think letting go of the control and letting Mother Nature take over is way more challenging than I realised it would be! Xx

@MadameDePompadour How is the side pain today? Has it subsided?

@AnxiousLady1 yes thank you it hasn’t really happened today. The odd general twinge low in my tummy but I think it was the left hand side aspect that was really bothering me. Finally got thru to my EPU but they say they won’t scan me until 7 weeks so have to wait to 25 March for that. I am a bit concerned about that given my history (ectopic became apparent at about 7 weeks last time) but I guess I have to trust what they say. I presume it’s hard to see anything until then. Focus is to stay calm and positive atm...

@MadameDePompadour My EPU operates drop in hours. You might be waiting anything up to 4 hours, which isn't ideal, but understandable. If you continue to have concerns perhaps your EPU has the same? I went in on my last pregnancy as I was worried about spotting. They scanned me and at that stage I was measuring 5w3d and there was a heartbeat. So you'd be surprised what they can pick up at that early stage.

As you say, given your history it's natural to feel anxious, but I would take reassurance from the fact that they didn't tell you to come straight in or book you in sooner. They obviously feel risk is low. I've resolved to try and wait until around the 7-8 week mark and get a private scan. That's going to be my first milestone, as the MMC was at 7weeks last time. 25th March will come quicker than you think, and as @AlviesMam said yesterday, if you've got some of the usual pregnancy symptoms (including the side pain), and no bleeding, then all we can do is take it as positive!