Smoking while pregnant

[Eimz]

I am really beating myself up about the smoking. I am currently 18weeks pregnant and smoker , since I found out I was pregnant I have really cut back a lot. I do not smoke a full cigarette I ask my partner or friends for a couple of drags.. all day in work I don't smoke it's just when I'm home. Does anyone know how truly harmful this is for the baby? I know people who smoked during pregnancy a lot more then me.. I know I cant justify my smoking but I really am only taking pulls and then literally downing a gallon of water to try make myself feel better :(
I've loads going on I've failed my driving test and an exam I was doing and my partner is between jobs and my mam is fighting with me and sometimes I just need the odd drag or two too calm me down

@Penguin34

If OP and her partner continue to smoke, I can't see them adhering to that advice. No one will hold the baby if that was the case 🤷‍♀️.

I think it's clear OP doesn't want to listen to the risks of smoking while pregnant and living with those who smoke. She brushed off the risks of SIDS like it was just a mean thing to say.

Advice is falling on deaf ears unless it's "it's so hard poor you".

@NameChange30 sorry didn't mean that lol
I know it's so shit. Everyone smokes - as I'm sure you've all read I failed my driving test so I still need my mam to bring me places and she was smoking in the car. Another time when I was very early on I was sitting in the back seat of the car and my brother had a face on him when I asked him not to smoke. I actually hated been a smoker pregnant or not but I am determined. I don't smoke every day but I did today , I went for dinner with my friends and then after the food everyone went to the smoking area for a smoke so I smoked.. after the few pulls I threw it away

I think you are doing your best and a few puffs here and there is fine. Don't beat yourself up and dont let others either. All the best to you with your pregnancy and baby xxx

There's a really good video on YouTube from the series 'misbehaving mums to be' and there's an epesode where the midwife explains in detail what smoking does to the baby in the womb.

The series as a whole was a good watch.

Check it out though, it might help.

Good luck with your pregnancy and quitting

Lol? And what's with the emoji? Are we teenagers now?

If you're going to insult someone at least get the username right.

No one has mentioned the Allan Carr (not the comedian) book, Easy Way to Stop Smoking. That’s what inspired me to give up. It’s excellent and explains why scaremongering often has the opposite effect.

I’ve never smoked but my dad who had been a heavy smoker for over 30 years gave up over 20 years ago having tried umpteen other methods.

Got to be worth a go OP?

All these selfish arseholes you live with are going to have to stop smoking in the house anyway once you have the baby - surely?

Yes I think OP misinterpreted NameChange30's earlier post which was a response to someone saying they managed to quit even while surrounded by smokers at work. I think NameChange30 was trying to explain this was a different situation from actually living with three smokers which is a much more difficult situation.

It's completely understandable that OP has not properly followed what people are saying because she has been attacked and made to feel shit by so many posters on this thread in such rapid succession.

How do any of you think you are helping?

I think you are doing your best and a few puffs here and there is fine.

On what basis is a few puffs fine?

Right, you obviously know that smoking is bad and already feel guilty. So, helpful tips.

I used pregnancy sickness to my advantage, in that I had nausea and vomiting from 14 DPO and as soon as I got the positive test, I couldn’t face the cigs. At 18 weeks I’m guessing the nausea has abated, but if there is a resurgence, or you get a stomach bug, seize the opportunity to be repulsed!

This is gross, but try collecting some dog ends and putting them in a sealed jar with a bit of water. When you crave, open the jar and take a deep breath of the unbearable stench within... Still want to smoke?

Try painting your nails. And let them dry properly - no sneaky cigarette which could mess up the polish.

Practically, as PP have said, you need to ask your housemates to refuse to let you have a drag. Especially DP! He needs to step up and protect his baby in the same way that you are trying to do.

Oh and do switch to the gum or inhalator to quit. You could be off everything containing nicotine within a week or two!

For reference, I smoked 10 per day for 10 years, and my husband 15 per day for 20 years. He quit two weeks after me, because it’s his baby too. I would urge your partner to reconsider his choices... can he come with you to your midwife appointments?

Best of luck!

@Eimz firstly, congratulations! And well done you for posting about your struggles with smoking - a lot of people struggle with this during pregnancy but are so ashamed that they just try to keep it hidden rather than trying to get help.

I've worked in respiratory, and we always encourage people that the best thing they can do for their health (pregnant or not) is quit smoking. But people have to be ready for change. You sound guilt ridden over this, and you're aware of the health risks to yourself, and your baby. I'm not sure where you live, but it would be worth asking your midwife or gp if you can be referred to a smoking cessation nurse. They're trained in behaviour change (and often cbt) to help with the psychological aspects of breaking the habit, and can usually help you find medication or aids to help you as you quit.

It's really hard to stop smoking, and although people might say pregnancy should make it easier, I imagine it makes it harder in many ways. Give yourself the best chance at quitting and get support, it is out there. Good luck!

My cousin is early 40's & is smoking & drinking throughout the pregnancy. She's around 33 weeks now. I'm so worried about the baby. The way I look at it is, the baby hasn't got a choice, you have. You should want to give it the best start in life. I know I would but I'm not a smoker so is easy for me to say. Can you try hypnotherapy?

@PepePig I am a 22 year old woman I have no other place to live other then where I am now. I do hope to move away but it's just not that easy.

, I don't want people telling me Awh poor you. I want to talk about MY FEELINGS amongst other people who have been in my situation.

Xo

I think you need to take the advice given on here if you can't do it yourself or for your baby.

Imagine how you will feel if there is lasting damage to your baby and living knowing you did that to your own child, yes it is a bloody hard thing to think about but it is the reality of your actions. Ultimately you need to decide you are stopping and do whatever it needs to stop.

I loved smoking and still would, but I put my child first, they are defenceless and look to parents to protect them. Yes it was the bloody hard but you can do it, there will always be an excuse to have a "drag" you need to fight it.

Speak to your midwife and go on the "misbehaving mums to be".

With my DC1 I cut down gradually and quit by 16 weeks- the pregnancy was a surprise and I hadn't mentally prepared to quit smoking out of the blue! Currently pregnant again and, this time, I right after the the positive test. Having tried both cutting down and cold turkey, I can say COLD TURKEY 100% EASIER (after the first few days). All you're doing at the moment by 'cutting down' is prolonging the stress and guilt and not even enjoying the smoking- as well as harming baby. My partner, both parents, siblings and a couple of good friends also all smoke so I understand how difficult it is- I'm around it a lot like you are.
I have actually wanted to quit for a couple of years and I know that if I can't do it when pregnant, I will never do it. Hoping to stay smoke free once baby arrives too (felt guilty cuddling my newborn stinking of smoke last time.... the smokers guilt is here to stay once you're a mum!)

Knowing these two things also spurred me on:

1. Smokers' babies are born addicted to nicotine- they experience withdrawal and discomfort and will cry more. They basically are born wanting a fag... too sad :(
2. The risk to the baby doesn't stop when they're born- risk of SIDS is much higher and also increases further if there is a smoker in the household (even if nobody smokes inside). I never had heard of this prior to DC1.

Just bite the bullet and quit. If I can do it, so can you!

@Lilkat
Many thanks for your congratulations I live in Ireland and I have spoke to my gp who just told me I need to stop to help my baby .. but I am going back to really discuss my struggles and guilt. I have my second scan in two weeks too so I truly cannot wait! I've had no symptoms or sickness so this will make it all so more realistic.
X

If you genuinely want to quit, and it definitely sounds like you do, then hypnotherapy will work. Not sure if it's something that you can get on the NHS, but if you do some research you should find someone who can help you stop after just one session. You clearly have the motivation. Good luck!

This thread is awful, for op, hope you get the support you need x

Sorry, just saw you're in Ireland so NHS not an option.

@MummingIt2018 we have something similar called HSE so I'm going to go to my docs and see what help there is..
Thank you for your comment xx

I don't smoke every day but I did today , I went for dinner with my friends and then after the food everyone went to the smoking area for a smoke so I smoked.. after the few pulls I threw it away

Try a vape. It's very good for this type of situation. You save money too because you just put it back in your bag for next time instead of throwing it away. Keep it charged and filled and you'll be relapse-proof.

www2.hse.ie/wellbeing/quit-smoking/get-help-when-you-quit-smoking/get-help-when-you-quit-smoking.html

@Eimz your mum does realise that once the baby is here, it is illegal to smoke in a car which has children in it.

Although it wont stop the impact of lingerin3 smoke I suppose 🤦‍♀️

Oops also didnt see you are in ireland so not sure if law is same over there

1. Smokers' babies are born addicted to nicotine- they experience withdrawal and discomfort and will cry more. They basically are born wanting a fag... too sad

No this is not true.

I’ll never forget the first smoker’s placenta I saw when I was a student midwife, the visible affects were really shocking.

Please seek help to quit OP, there’s lots of suggestions here already. Once born your baby is at higher risk of SIDS.

My DM is now living with the consequences of smoking. It is awful, truly awful to watch someone you love suffering with chronic illness caused by smoking. Look after yourself and your baby.