Breast feeding or formula???

[lovelyjubbly12]

Just wondering what everyone's take on the subject is. I've been seriously considering breast feeding but I'm just not sure if i actually want too... and then I do a complete 360 and feel like a bad mum and almost pressure myself into wanting it....

Is there anyone else out there in the same boat? Does anyone have a pro and con on both types of feeding?

I just feel like formula would be easier all round. And I wouldnt usually take the easy route if it's not the best option but I feel overwhelmed as it is, and I feel like one less thing to master would be easier.

I actually find it far easier to bf in public vs close family members as I don't give a damn if I flash a random. I'll add this hasn't happened yet as there are very good clothing options, such as shawls and special cardigan. Sometimes if I'm wearing a loose top or jumper I put baby under it and up.

Honestly don't let fear of what other people think put you off doing what's best for you and baby if that's what you decide. I remember doing it for the very first time in a cafe and was certain everyone was looking at me and was so embarrassed. You very quickly get used to it. I always used one of those covers you put over your head as had a bit of trouble getting baby to latch and was shy about flashing people but lots of people don't bother.

but right now the thought of BF in public is daunting. And I don't want to isolate myself in anyway because of fear.

Most of the time people won't even notice. How often do you actually notice a baby being breastfed when you're in cafes etc? People have to be really close by you to actually know it's happening and even then they can't see anything revealing.

I've never had any comments at all on breastfeeding (and I've never bothered covering up- just tend to whack a boob out. Don't do it as much now as she's older but when mine was little I walked round ASDA, boob fully out, baby on nipple. No one batted an eyelid.

Also, many places- shopping centres etc- now have family rooms or areas. A few have feeding cubicles stocked with comfy armchairs. Another tip is if you're thinking of getting a new car, get one with tinted rear windows. I did and in the early days when I was less confident it was brilliant- whenever I had my car with me I had somewhere private to feed.

Argh, failed to close the bracket! Oh, the shame.

At the start of my pregnancy I thought in definitely gonna try breast feeding.... towards the end of what turned out to be a long difficult pregnancy exams / scans every week etc... I couldn’t bear the thought of anything sucking from me afterwards ..

To me breastfeeding would have been like still being pregnant and my mental health would have suffered...

I was able to have a few nights off and a full nights sleep in the early days as dh could do the nights :)

I have a nearly 6 month old now who is the happiest most laid back baby I’ve ever met who’s been sleeping through the night from 10 weeks

Bottle prep takes about 15 mins of everyday and the cost is offset by a full nights sleep and the most charming giggly baby ever

Do not regret my decision for a second xx

the cost is offset by a full nights sleep and the most charming giggly baby ever

To be fair to breastfeeding, it doesn't make your baby any less charming or giggly. And some breastfed babies sleep really well. And some formula fed babies are absolutely terrible sleepers.

My bf sleeps better than my ff baby. It still ain’t great sleep!

My 10 week old bf baby has done a solid 9 hour stretch or a 5 hour followed by 4hour stretch for a few weeks. She's also very smiley and content. Formula feeding doesn't equal good sleeper, it's the luck of the draw.

notacooldad but are you saying there is anything inaccurate in my post
I was offering my experience with mix feeding and saying there were no problems for me and life became a lot easier once the decision was made to do both.

the cost is offset by a full nights sleep and the most charming giggly baby ever

Breast fed babies can be charming, giggly and sleep well at night. It's not exclusive to formula feeding. My bf baby sleeps much better than the formula fed one did, he's also much happier and more content. Every baby is different and I don't think those things are decided by feeding method.

I haven’t read the whole thread but for those saying “just give it a go” I’m not sure BF works like that, especially the first time around. It’s so difficult in the beginning - and so important that baby gains weight etc - that unless you’re really committed and have support it’s almost inevitable formula will seem a better option. At least, that’s been my experience and that of the people around me.

I agree it is far easier/lazier than bottle feeding once it’s established, and for me the peace of mind that I could keep feeding through tummy upsets and comfort during illness was worth a lot, too.

It's not difficult for everyone in the beginning @fretnot. And it's better that the baby gets some of the colostrum than is put straight onto formula for fear of breastfeeding being too difficult.

I had no preference when i was pregnant (despite every HC professional asking at each appt) and was separated from my baby after birth as he went to NICU and i had to have emergency surgery. So for the first 24 hrs of his life, he was syringe and cup fed. When i eventually got to hold him, i was encouraged to stick him on the boob. And we were off...

9 months on, we are just about making the transition to one boob a day (5am as can't be bothered with the faff of formula!) - i mainly BF for 6 months, expressing in those early days too so dad could help / he could have a bottle whilst out (he used to take AGES on the boob).

Pros
Free!
Convenient (no prep or sterilising unless you express)
Antibodies help protect and fight off germs
Burns calories (to offset the cake you will crave from lack of sleep)

Cons
Time consuming
Reliant on you
Need to take care of those nips
Not sure how much is going in (we had some tummy problems which affected weight gain and had a horrible few weeks of worry thanks to an awful HV).

It doesn't come without its trials but, once i had pushed past the first 8 weeks of newborn guzzling, and his feeds started to speed up and get efficient, it was dead easy.

Everyone is different, and fed is best.

It's not difficult for everyone in the beginning

Seconded. With DC1 we did need some help in the first 24 hours in hospital to get him to latch but as soon as we were past that it was all smooth sailing. A tiny bit of pain on initial latch for maybe a week and that was it.

With DC2 we did get the shared nipple/oral thrush so had to have the cream/drops but even that wasn't that painful. And I still think the additional faff of having to wash my tops and bras on a hot wash and do the cream/drops for a few weeks was tons less faff than making up bottles and having to work out how many you need to go out etc.

There are plenty of places where you can feed discreetly - most large supermarkets and department stores (and baby shops) will have private feeding areas.

There is a great FB page called 'Can i breastfeed in it?' that gives you ideas for clothes to make it easier. I felt very self concious for the first few months and would seek somewhere private (or give an expressed bottle) but quickly realised that noone is watching. Invest in a good cotton scarf / muslin 😉

People say "fed is best" but no, it simply isn't. Breastfeeding is scientifically proven to be better for babies for a massive amount of reasons.

There are pros and cons to all 3 options but feeding method has no bearing on how well a baby sleeps.

I've been looking after babies since I was 13, and how a baby was fed had absolutely no impact on how well (or not!) they slept.

I've cared for ff babies that woke every hour and bf babies that slept a solid 6-7 hours at night.

My initially bf dd slept well from very early on, the only issue we/I had with her sleep is that she's an early riser and that didn't change when she went onto formula. She's nearly 19 now and still an early riser it's just how she is.

My sister has 3 first 2 were bf but 3rd was ff as they were very poorly and in hospital a long time etc long story. Nos 1 and 3 poor sleepers, no 2 virtually needs heavy machinery to remove him from bed and was always a great sleeper.

Bro has 2, eldest was bf great sleeper, youngest (different mum) ff dreadful sleeper - he's their little energiser bunny ALWAYS on the go another early riser too (as is my bro). Eldest is very laid back personality, youngest very active just different personality types.

We were bf only until 6 weeks then ff it's what my mum believed was the right way based on what she was told at the time, me and bro dreadful sleepers, sis was a great sleeper as a child but struggles now (mainly as her youngest has ongoing health issues and she's 'on alert' 24/7)

And I don't think bf is "lazy" just because it's quicker and more convenient.

Breastfeeding has so many benefits for both baby and mum compared to formula. I would recommend The Positive Breastfeeding Book, The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding and/or A Positive Guide to Breastfeeding. Get clued up before baby comes and you'll feel confident, prepared and able to deal with any issues that might crop up.

I'm breastfeeding my 2 year old and it's such an amazing comfort for him, as well as nutrition. I've loved breastfeeding, my experience has included exclusively pumping (DS was in hospital for 10 weeks), pumping and direct feeding with formula top ups, and finally managed to return to exclusively breastfeeding two weeks before he turned 6 months.

I would recommend trying to breastfeed, get support from a LC and supplement with formula if needed. If it doesn't work out no biggie, formula won't do any harm. But I personally have done both and breastfeeding was so much easier and cheaper!! Formula is crazy $$$! Also I loved the BF snuggles, it's a natural birth control (but still be careful of course, just nice to not have periods for a year) and the baby weight just dropped off from BF'ing.

For me the biggest pro to breast feeding was the best excuse I ever had to sit on the sofa and binge box sets.

If you genuinely don't want to breastfeed then don't. Some parts of Mumsnet consider it a sin to say it but your baby will be fine being formula fed. I made myself try breastfeeding because it was what was best for DS. And in some ways I liked it. I liked in theory how easy it was. However my milk took a while to come in and he cried and cried and cried constantly. I now know he was constantly hungry. He dropped a good portion of his birth weight and we ended up readmitted. I then decided I would pump as I felt like formula was the devil. Pumping for me was not sustainable and I gave up. I cried and cried for days about moving him to formula. This is a big part of the struggles I'm having with PND.

In an ideal world I would have had loads of one on one time with a lactation consultant and had a breakthrough and somehow my massive boobs wouldn't have embarrassed me feeding him in public but none of that was possible for me. I simply don't have the money or the brass neck. He's 7 weeks old and formula fed. He sleeps like a champ, he's 99th percentile for length and 91st for weight. He is perfect and he smiled for the first time yesterday and my heart nearly burst. He doesn't hate me for not breastfeeding him.

Sorry that got long, the long and the short of it is do what you WANT to do not what you feel like you are supposed to do. You'll make yourself miserable and a happy mummy is important.