My friend drinks, takes drugs and smokes and still gets pregnant! How?

[BelleeBluee27]

Feeling a little low as my friend who already has three children has just found out she’s expecting a fourth child.

She smokes, drinks and takes drugs recreationally. I’m just struggling to get my head around it. Myself and my OH have been TTC for 8 months now with no luck and one miscarriage.

I’ve been told I’m the perfect candidate to house a baby .... I don’t smoke, don’t drink, never taken drugs. I eat healthily and have ideal bmi, etc, etc.... so why is it that women who do everything that is apparently “harmful” or has “negative effects on fertility” so fertile?

There’s no justice in baby making and it’s easier when you come to terms with it or the unfairness will make you crazy.

Sorry about your miscarriage and every luck ttc

We were diagnosed with unexplained infertility. Same boat as you. Perfectly healthy. Even told we were perfect candidates for egg/ sperm donation. It took us 6 years and we finally conceived on our 2nd round of ivf. I watched the world around me full of unfair situations. I am a teacher so you can imagine the many things I've seen! You must not let it get to you. If you're feeling really worried go to the docs to get some preliminary blood tests to check for ovulation etc. It may put your mind at ease. I cannot give you all the answers. It is hard I hope that you get your BFP soon x

I was ttc dc2 for a year and living like an angel. After a year I gave up hope, went to a friend's party, went home during the party as I was ovulating then returned to the party. I was drinking and smoking weed that night.... And guess what that is when I conceived. I can't explain it but I guess if you are not thinking about it nature has its way.
I hope your turn comes soon

Some people can just get pregnant easier than others... It's crap situation but that's just the way it is. Don't let it get to you and keep trying it will eventually happen

Thank you to all of you for your wise words the encouragement is really what I needed!

I hate to be so impatient. But injustice does come to mind. Nice to know that there are plenty of women out there that feel my pain! Xx

So sorry OP.

Her habits may have awful repercussions on the baby though.

I agree with what ^ @woodhill said

I hope she stops the drugs and smoking and drinking now she knows she is pregnant, that poor child!

I hope you get pregnant yourself soon good luck

I've had x3 miscarriages despite doing everything 'right'. A friend drank, smoked and took drugs throughout her pregnancies - even coke and alcohol the day before birth - and her four kids are fine.

It's very hard not to be bitter. It's so unfair