AIBU to be annoyed at how genderist even baby clothing is?

[Monipop84]

We are over the moon to be expecting our fist child, a little girl, in April :) Complicit the Black Friday sales, I have been doing a bit of online shopping over the weekend. I am amazed by how many websites still have baby (infant!) clothing divided into "boys" and "girls" categories, which I honestly find ridiculous. Why should a Peter Rabbit babygro be for boys only? Or a space babygro? There are a few "gender neutral" shops out there (Mori makes good stuff) but they are so expensive. To be clear, I am not ostracising the odd pink top or cute shirt, but I am keen on raising my little girl without many stereotypes and I am seeing that so much of girl stuff is still so twee and frilly and has terrible slogans on it.

Fortunately pink women's sportswear ends up in the sale - I have no problem with pink clothes, I just want a choice. For me if pink is cheaper I will buy it, but refuse to spend more for pink.

For DD if I want her to wear something (coat, jumper, gloves, hat, rainsuit) I will buy pink even if it costs more because there is more chance she will wear it - and getting the stubborn beastie to wear warm stuff is a battle that I will throw money at!

I inherited a tonne of pink/girls stuff for DD from a relative, so whenever I needed to buy something new (not that often) I made sure to get something less so for her. It's not about banning pink, what I really wanted to avoid was her thinking that she is only 'allowed' pink and nothing else. As it happened, she never had a pink, princessy phase once old enough to express a preference (not that there's anything wrong with it, but it's not inevitable).

I've noticed how heavily pink everything is in the girls section and frilly and slightly smaller in size. I'm expecting a girl and will be using all of my sons hand me downs, had a bag of pink stuff given to me and have bought a few items new but I'm bracing myself for the baby being mistaken for a boy as I've already had a couple of portly hidden looks when I told people I'm using DS's clothes. I also believe uniform policies for school should be non- gendered too - trousers, skirt , shirts, shirt, jumper cardigan. Why do we need to specify?

It is so annoying. I have a son and I’m due another boy. All the boy clothes in shops seem to be navy blue, grey or some sort of sludgy colour. I have always sought out bright and colourful clothes and people always think he is a girl. Equally I hate pink and frills which seems to be the vast majority of girls clothes

I agree with you but from the opposite perspective- I have an 11 month old son and it frustrates me no end that the majority of boys clothes seem limited to blue or grey. I feel like when I shop for baby clothes it's the girls that seem to have so much more choice and colour and the girls section is always much much larger than the boys

I shop both sections for my son - I often buy cardies from the girls section as there's a better choice of colours. And woolly tights for wearing under trousers.

Did have some nitwit the other day convinced he was a girl as his babygrow had purple unicorns on it. On being assured he was a boy last time I changed his nappy, she then insisted they must be horses as 'boys aren't interested in unicorns'.

Really love? He's 6 weeks old. He has two interests in life atm, left boob and right boob!

Try tartan most worn by both sexes and they can be bright and colourful

You’re completely right OP, it’s ridiculous. Places are slowly catching on though. PatPat online is brilliant for boys and girls clothes that step outside the stereotypes. I want it all!

I am 21 weeks with a little boy and after a few scans in the shops and online in the sales the clothes are just awful!! I had far more choice for my DD.. defo agree with a PP there is more choice for girls defo and more non girly stuff emerging these days too..everything is either lightening bolts or dinosaurs for boys in royal blue or green . Sick of looking at bloody dinosaurs for newborns .

What annoys me most is the perfectly lovely babygros that are in neutral colours like yellow or grey or green but because they're in the girls section, they have enormous frills on the shoulder. WHY?!? Regardless of whether my child is a boy or a girl it really doesn't need extra frills to get food and vomit in 😂

John Lewis have some lovely neutral babygros - slightly more expensive but not awful and very tasteful.

Following on from that, I found Asda to be the worst when it comes to gendering. Tesco can be quite good.

I had g/b dt last time and used predominately white clothes, think people generally brought either white stuff or pink/blue things

This time i had a girl- i said to my 70 year old aunt (so generational view maybe? Dont know) that i had lots of white stuff which i was going to use- she said its a shame not to dress her all in pink (personally i dont like dressing babies in anything too nice as they will invariably poo on it)

Mothercare did some lovely girls clothes in a denim blue that are my favourite and do some lovely rainbow clothes

I second pp that suggested John Lewis - lovely clothes, and mostly gender neutral. If you can go during a sale it's even better.

It’s manageable to buy neutral clothes in newborn and 0-3 month sizes (and in non expensive shops). After that, however, it seems practically impossible.

Can't you just choose baby clothing in any colour other than pastel pink or blue? That's what I did in 2000.

Can't you just choose baby clothing in any colour other than pastel pink or blue? That's what I did in 2000.

OP's whole point - and I agree with her - is that this is getting harder, especially if you buy quite cheap brands. In my experience the supermarkets have pink, blue, plain white (which is see through and cheap looking if you're buying at that price) and then a load of Disney branded stuff.

Yes it's a lot easier to buy gender-neutral if you have money to burn. £15 per item gets you great ungendered style. If you want to buy a 5-pack for a tenner you have to choose which gender stereotype to go with.

Try eBay. There are sellers that do plain things like sleepsuits, t shirts and leggings in a range of colours for a reasonable price.

Gendering persists.
Try being an adult female golfer if you don't like pink or purple.
My last set of clubs had flowers on the shafts!

It’s not about banning girls from wearing pink, it’s about making sure they’re not told ‘only pink, or you’re not a real girl.’ Or boys told ‘only trucks, or you’re not a real boy.’

Which sounds so bloody ridiculous but it is happening. All this TRA nonsense with ‘oh he liked dolls and pink clothes so I knew he was a girl at two years old...’ it’s the rigid gender stereotyping that’s a problem. I’m already seeing far less variation in how teenage girls dress. When I was that age it was Ok to have short hair or biker boots - now they all look the same and it’s quite a ‘sexualised’ look.

There’s nothing wrong with some clothes being pink - the problem is when little girls can ONLY wear pink. Or little boys can ONLY wear certain stuff or they’re ‘wrong.’

I have boys and have noticed when shopping with friends who have girls how much skimpier cut the girls stuff is. It’s thinner fabric, less practical, stingier cuts etc. It’s not as suited to active play.

That’s the problem - not a bit of pink or some frilly frocks now and again - it’s the rigid gender stereotyping and girls stuff not being suitable to climb trees in.

The scandi brands tend to be bright colours for both sexes

Agree! Boys' clothes don't have a lot of fun or colour to them, and girls' are flimsy sparkly nonsense. It doesn't do either sex many favours. I'm expecting a daughter, and fully intend to let her have a good bit of sparkly nonsense, because it's fun, but it's certainly not the way I want to dress her every day. I feel equally distressed that if I had a son he would not be allowed to enjoy that same sparkly nonsense.

I want my kids just to have kids' clothes when they are little - colourful, comfortable, hard-wearing stuff with some fun to it. It depresses me that in pretty much every kids' shop the girls' stuff is a wall of pink and flowers, while the boys' is all sludge green and blue. I'm stocking up on gender-neutral scandi bits on ebay, but they're too expensive for me to buy new.

Scandi brands are great because they have a range of basic clothing styles (trousers, leggings, tops, dresses, plus shorts and t shirts for summer ranges) which stay the same and then release a new range of prints each season which are available as each of those items of clothing. So you can dress your boys and girls (and sometimes yourself) in the same prints and dresses aren’t limited to pink and flowery

They are £££££ though, but there’s a good second hand market for them

Completely agree! I really hate walking into a baby clothes or toy shop and being able to tell at a glance the boys and girls section due to the flood of pink and blue in each direction.

@AuntieStella is right - it is a marketing thing, and an attempt to sell twice as many baby clothes. It works because you see loads of frilly pink girly baby dresses on sale that have hardly been worn because relatives all want to buy something sweet.

It was the same 20 years ago when I bought baby and toddler clothes, but is MUCH worse now. Instead of just being displayed as for boys and girls, they are now designed so that it is almost impossible to use them for the other sex without inviting adverse comment.

I used to love buying simple unfrilled toddler clothes in bright colours- reds, blues, greens, yellows. Clothes like this barely exist now.