I hope my abortion fails! Chances?

[JaneStudy]

Sorry, i dont know where this goes so might have posted twice :/
Hello, i'm 24, partner is 28. Found out i was pregnant 2 weeks ago. Wasnt expecting it! I didnt know what to do so we rung an abortion clinic because of the waiting list for 2 weeks away so we'd have time to think but also that option.

Over those 2 weeks, i became attached to my baby but knew i had a uni degree to complete and no job.

Abortion day arrived and i was certain i was going to keep it but went anyway for the scan and to be sure. Found out we were meant to be having triplets but one hadnt formed probably so was just a floating cell and 2 identical twins. This was a shocker!! And the idea of twins petrified me. The midwife give us time to think but my partner immedietly said "we cant deal with twins" and i agreed because at the time i was shocked and genuinly believed i couldnt cope. I saw the scan and the heartbeats sad

2 hour wait for the medical pill. My boyfriend was googling twin videos and seemed excited but he didnt really say he wanted to keep them.

Anyway, we were called in and I took one pill orally and 4 others were inserted in the vagina by the midwife. My boyfriend did look deeply upset before i took them but I thought we both knew what we wanted since in the 2 weeks prior he had been adament they were just a bag of cells.

I also have a kidney infection so i have quite bad back pain. The midwife said the sac should pass by 8pm.

I felt fine, and bleeding started at 5pm. This is when i broke down in tears and realised my mistake. I felt fine but was bleeding until 7:30pm where i had a 5 minute cramp (which wasnt too painful, just felt more like my back was hurting and i needed a poop) so went for a poop and i then i felt fine, cramp was gone, but still bleeding of course.

Anyways, i've been bleeding for 2 days now, and it's usually just watery blood - sometimes just a line, sometimes spread around the pad.

No cramps, and only a few blood clots - some black. But no sign of sac? Well, I havent felt or notice it pass?

I'm praying this is a failed abortion! Is it possible one could survive? Or it could be the floating cell which is leaving my body?

I take a pregnancy test next saturday and i'm hoping it comes back positive. I made a massive mistake and cant stop crying sad

oh honey i'm so sorry to hear what a horrible time you are having. i don't have any useful advice i'm afraid but i will be thinking of you.

Sorry I don't have any experience or knowledge in this area but I didn't want to read and run, sending hugs to you and I hope whatever the outcome it works out for the best for all of you.xx 💐

I don’t have any experience of this kind of situation but I hope you’re ok - didn’t want to read and run x

Thank you both ,

Thank you RachelYC, i will keep everyone updated as to what happens next saturday, trying not to get my hopes high though :(

No advice but so so sad for you.

I'm so sorry OP (and OP's DP), what an awful situation

Praying for you all and wishing you the best. If this doesn't work out you know you can try again when circumstances are better - this is not the end, ok?

I am so sorry. I have had miscarriages so I cannot comment too much, but you are describing what sounds like miscarrying. The chances of the abortion not having happened are infinitesimal.

What follow up do you have? It sounds like you need counselling of some kind

I'm so sorry you're feeling this way. You made a decision with your heads but your hearts feel differently. I know nothing about abortions so no idea of the practicalities but I would honestly prepare yourself for the worst, then look to the future. You will try again when you are in a better place. Good luck 

No experience but so sorry to read this lovey. Thinking of you and hope things will work out for you and DP 

I just wish i went home and processed the the idea of twins instead of going into panic mode :( i'm certain i wouldve kept the baby if the scan showed an individual one. Even though i was only 6 weeks, i just want my babies back :(
The only plus was I thought i was infertile due to irregular periods (hence the shock), but the midwife said i'm extremely fertile and likely to have twins in the future!

Pray i'm part of the 2 in 100 that the medical abortion fails on!!

I'm so so sorry. You need to prepare for the worst. These very rarely fail. I'm absolutely heartbroken for you both.

I have a doctors appointment on Friday to get some antibiotics for my infection and then i'll probably have a good cry to her

I'm so sorry lovely but you really need to prepare yourself for this. It rarely fails. I'm so so sad for you and sending a virtual handhold to help you through.

Definitely speak to the GP about counselling. I know a few people who have had terminations that they didn't really want and they have all said how much they wished they had taken the counselling they were offered.

You made the right decision for you at the time. Try not to look back and second guess yourself and try hard not to feel too guilty. What's done is done x

I will pray
And if things do not work out now, that they will in the future

Oh darling I am so sorry, I hope things work out for you though please don’t pin all your hopes on this. & please be cautious-I was in a similar position with the bleeding many moons ago and ended up being quite poorly a few days later. Highly unlikely to happen to you but take it easy & don’t overdo anything-you don’t need any more trauma at the moment. I sincerely hope you get your miracle, be it on this occasion or in future xx

Thanks everyone

Really hope you get a miracle and I'll kee everything crossed for you. Have you got anyone in RL you can talk to? Maybe try explaining to your dp that you really need some support now and even if he isn't ready to talk about it could he just hold you as you really don't want to go through it alone. I had the tablets after a missed miscarriage and couldn't bear to look in the toilet after feeling something come away and I know I really needed my dh around even if we weren't very talkative it was just so he could hold me

I told my mum after the abortion since i was a moody, tearful mess so I had to tell her hahah, she's so supportive and always listens to my rants, moans and tears.
My boyfriend has been supportive. But the day after abortion (sunday) it must have hit him and he's shyed away. Not really speaking to me, doesnt really want to see me :( part of me wonders whether he's subconsciously blaming me, but I dont blame any of us, it just happened and none of were forceful, i just wish i stuck to my heart and not brain

I’m so sorry for you x be strong x

Thank you

I’m so sorry for you and your partner, I’m sending hugs 💕

I had an abortion at 19 (7 years ago now) with DP we’d just got together and I was in a similar situation to you. I remember those pills you’ve described, I was really ill I had several anti sickness injections in my buttocks as well. It was quite a traumatising experience but I can’t remember the “sack” maybe I blanked this out. However, I had a lot of bleeding and when it eventually came I could blantantly see what had came out (I’m really sorry I don’t quite know how to describe it) in one them grey pots they give you. I was around 8/9 weeks - I was in hospital all day I think I went in around 9am and was out by 5ish (I was the last out) they kept you in until a nurse checked everyone pot. I’m not sure if it’s changed as this was 7 years ago. However as I passed this in a day, it sounds like yours has went on a little longer though.

I don’t want to give you false hope or anything, but I didn’t want to leave this page without sharing my experience of abortion. Please don’t blame yourself as somebody else has commented you’ve done what was in your heart. I really think they should give more info to women as I never knew how this experience would play out personally. Sending lots of hugs x

Anyat212 Thank you for sharing your experience! Did you feel as devastated as me after it?? Since I feel im going crazy with sadness and tears!
I didnt get given a pot, i arrived at 8:30am and left at 1pm. I was given the oral tabley then the 4 vaginal ones, and an anti-sickness tablet (oral). Then i was sent home and the midwife said she was certain i'd pass it by 8pm that night.
Maybe i have passed it but not noticed? I've read online of so many people finding it obvious when it came out, almost like a grey ball or something, sometimes with a tail, and really bad pains. Whereas i have had no bad pain apart from the back one at 7:30pm but I didnt know if that was a mixture of needng a number 2 and my kidney infection. But maybe that was it but I just didnt notice or felt like i passed the sac!
I've been bleeding for 2 days though so this kind of ruins all hope :( mostly normal red blood with about 1-2 clots a day and some tissue.
I'm pretty sure blood indicates the babies havent survived doesnt it?

OP I don't have any experience to share but I do feel for you. Please do look after yourself.

Thank you MyOtherProfile