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Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Original poster

I hope my abortion fails! Chances?

73 replies

JaneStudy · 05/11/2018 21:22

Sorry, i dont know where this goes so might have posted twice :/
Hello, i'm 24, partner is 28. Found out i was pregnant 2 weeks ago. Wasnt expecting it! I didnt know what to do so we rung an abortion clinic because of the waiting list for 2 weeks away so we'd have time to think but also that option.

Over those 2 weeks, i became attached to my baby but knew i had a uni degree to complete and no job.

Abortion day arrived and i was certain i was going to keep it but went anyway for the scan and to be sure. Found out we were meant to be having triplets but one hadnt formed probably so was just a floating cell and 2 identical twins. This was a shocker!! And the idea of twins petrified me. The midwife give us time to think but my partner immedietly said "we cant deal with twins" and i agreed because at the time i was shocked and genuinly believed i couldnt cope. I saw the scan and the heartbeats sad

2 hour wait for the medical pill. My boyfriend was googling twin videos and seemed excited but he didnt really say he wanted to keep them.

Anyway, we were called in and I took one pill orally and 4 others were inserted in the vagina by the midwife. My boyfriend did look deeply upset before i took them but I thought we both knew what we wanted since in the 2 weeks prior he had been adament they were just a bag of cells.

I also have a kidney infection so i have quite bad back pain. The midwife said the sac should pass by 8pm.

I felt fine, and bleeding started at 5pm. This is when i broke down in tears and realised my mistake. I felt fine but was bleeding until 7:30pm where i had a 5 minute cramp (which wasnt too painful, just felt more like my back was hurting and i needed a poop) so went for a poop and i then i felt fine, cramp was gone, but still bleeding of course.

Anyways, i've been bleeding for 2 days now, and it's usually just watery blood - sometimes just a line, sometimes spread around the pad.

No cramps, and only a few blood clots - some black. But no sign of sac? Well, I havent felt or notice it pass?

I'm praying this is a failed abortion! Is it possible one could survive? Or it could be the floating cell which is leaving my body?

I take a pregnancy test next saturday and i'm hoping it comes back positive. I made a massive mistake and cant stop crying sad

OP posts:
snapnfarter · 05/11/2018 23:18

I'm so sorry. ☹️ I've had two terminations sadly, and each time they've made it very clear that once you start treatment there is no turning back. This is it, I'm afraid. Please don't get your hopes up only to have them dashed. Be kind to yourself and take time to grieve. You time as a mother will come, at a time that is right for you and your partner. Xx

Anyat212 · 05/11/2018 23:25

I was devastated to be honest however, I did get over it along with DP. I think it was the whole process aswell. I’ll be honest I think I’ve blocked a lot of this memory out I don’t remember a grey sack. However I had after birth stuck, a couple of days later I was crippled with stomach pain and ended up in a&e which a doctor had to physically remove - it was awful. It was a tiny amount as I remember thinking was that it? As I caught a glimpse of it. Maybe that’s the sac they are referring to?

I’m shocked you were not kept in - is that possible budget cuts? No pots either did they not give you anything? The ones I used were just like sick pots but bigger and you had to use them every time you went to the loo. I’d be like you though I’d wonder if I missed it? I used a couple of pots but I really could see it there, it was about an inch in size and it broke my heart. It was tiny but I was checking them pots before I’d get the nurse. I took the oral tablet at the scan approx 2 days before my hospital visit too, once at the hospital I then had the tablets in my vagina, sickness tablets too (which ironically made me more sick hence having the ones in my buttock!) and a tablet in my bum (tmi) to stop any potential infections.

My DP reaction similar to yours, but we’d only been together approximately a month and I was seeing someone body else just before (I know not great but I was a very young 19 year old) but I knew it was DP and that was never an issue. We both lived at our parents anyway and we spent a few days away from each other, DP still doesn’t open up about his feelings not sure if yours is the same? It took approx 4 months to discuss this and it was after a night out. We both were gutted but it was the right decision.

It was an awful experience but we got through it. I don’t want you to ever blame yourself as I did that for a long time and it’s soo easy to ignore people who say “it was the right choice” it’s just going to be a raw and sensitive subject.

I’m not sure on the blood side sorry - is there nothing on Google on this? Did the nurse not atleast provide an information pack or anything?

I’m just thinking of next steps - did the nurse say how long this bleeding will last for? And what to do next I.e could you contact your GP to see what’s happened? Sorry I’m not much help here as I can’t remember much bleeding after mine and only had the experience of the leftover afterbirth to go off X

Queenofthedrivensnow · 05/11/2018 23:31

I felt the sac pass but I was about 8 weeks I think.

Unicyclethief · 05/11/2018 23:36

My mum always said it was just the hormones that were making me want to keep a very poorly timed pregnancy. (I was still at school doing A-levels) and she was right. As soon as my hormones settled down after the termination I realised it was the best thing I could have done. I finished my A-levels, got a BA an MA and went travelling, I now have a fab career and two wonderful children! Sorry you are feeling this way now, but there will come a time when you are ready for a family.

MagicalCreatures · 06/11/2018 04:11

Like other posters, I really hope you seek some help/counselling after this.
I am so sorry your going through this 💐
I had an abortion at 19 and although I think about it everyday (12 years later) I know, and knew from the start that it really wasn’t the best time. I wish I had been in a better place to have kept my baby and if I had of been then I would have. But I wasn’t and I had to accept it.
With mine, I didn’t stay in. They gave me the oral tablet one day then I had to return the next day for the pessary.
I went home and within a few hours the cramps started. They were very painful and became more intense like real contractions.
When they were at there worst, I went to the toilet and everything passed in one go. As soon as it did, the pain was gone and I was left with a normal like period. I never noticed a sac and I was just over 6 weeks.
The problem is OP, that at the time, the consultants told me that once you take the oral tablet, there’s no turning back.
Well you could decide not to go ahead with the pessaries but they don’t recommend it because there’s a chance the baby could have problems after. I was told the tablet is what stops your body from accepting the pregnancy and helps the embryo come away from the womb.
Then the pessaries are what help open your cervix and clear everything out.
I don’t know if this information has changed but that’s what I was told so unfortunately I really think you need to prepare for the worst but I will be hoping and wishing on every star in the sky that your little ones are meant to be. X

Rachelover40 · 06/11/2018 04:57

Flowers Flowers Flowers

So sorry for you, don't know what to say really but this time will pass. Please come back and let us know how you are.

Original poster
JaneStudy · 06/11/2018 10:45

Thank you so much everybody! It's probably best i dont get my hopes high and accept thats what is done is done. I'll keep everyone updated though xxx

OP posts:
TheRealHousewifeofCheshire · 08/11/2018 21:28

Wont ask how you are sweetie but thinking of you

Original poster
JaneStudy · 10/11/2018 18:25

Hi everyone! I'm coping much better than I was! (Next saturday cant come quick enough though!!).
I'm still hoping at least one of my babies have survived but at least the shock and depressed-like feeling is over.
I still feel pregnant - sore boobs and cant stop eating. But i understand that is normal for abortion too- that it takes a while for the hormones to leave the body.
When i took my original pregnancy test, it was clearblue digital which said I was 3 + weeks, and i was intrigued last night (wanted to see if it had gone down to 2 weeks) so took one of my spares and i'm still 3+ weeks. However, i'm not getting my hopes high since, like I said, i'll still have hormones!
I am beginning to understand that the likelihood of any surviving is low.
Just a quick question:
If one twin can survive miscarriage, then essentially cant one twin survive abortion? Considering theyre very similar body-wise apart from one is natural and one is medically-induced?

OP posts:
Icklepup · 10/11/2018 18:32

:(
Hope they stick

Original poster
JaneStudy · 10/11/2018 18:47

Thank you

OP posts:
KataraJean · 10/11/2018 19:37

Prayers for you Flowers

NotMyFinestMoment · 10/11/2018 19:44

I imagine its too late now but the abortion pill can sometimes be reversed.

americanpregnancy.org/unplanned-pregnancy/abortion-pill-reversal/

NotMyFinestMoment · 10/11/2018 19:46

Perhaps if you can get yourself to see a GP urgently and ask for a progesterone injection.

ReggieKrayDoYouKnowMyName · 10/11/2018 19:53

I hope you get some counselling because I think you need it. I also hope you’re doing okay. Thinking of you.

6onTheHappyFarm · 10/11/2018 19:57

Hope this all works out for you OP Flowers

Pigeoncat · 10/11/2018 20:00

I had a medical abortion that failed, it does happen but very unlikely.

Unfortunately although the abortion failed and I was confirmed as still pregnant, the story is not a positive one, as I then miscarried and haemorrhaged a few weeks later. I don’t know if it was connected to the abortion or not.

Sorry - not what you want to hear. I wish you the best, what ever happens.

Original poster
JaneStudy · 10/11/2018 20:04

Thank you everyone, i'm.doing fine and im slowly coming to terms with it :) like i said very early on in the post, i think i'm just hoping because there were twins and one floating cell (which was a baby which didnt form) that perhaps theres a higher chance one of my babies survived! But whatever will be will be and i'll update you all om Saturday with the results of the test!

OP posts:
SneakyGremlins · 10/11/2018 20:08

Hope you get a good result OP.

DwangelaForever · 10/11/2018 20:09

Thanks fingers crossed for you

Original poster
JaneStudy · 10/11/2018 20:20

Thank you

OP posts:
kpeanut94 · 10/11/2018 21:22

I had an abortion before my current pregnancy now because I was just not mentally stable and ready for a baby at that time last year. I took the tablet and had the cervical pessary and I passed the baby within two hours of that happening. The clinic told me the oral pill will stop the pregnancy hormones and kill the baby as it stops the hormone progesterone needed for pregnancy to flourish :( and the pessary just makes you contract and doesn't always work.

I felt instant regret after I did it and think about that baby everyday. Especially now I'm pregnant now, couldn't be happier about this one. Still doesn't stop that niggle I carry everyday thinking about the first one though x

MadeForThis · 10/11/2018 22:02

Please try not to hope too much x

TheRealHousewifeofCheshire · 10/11/2018 22:32

You dont have to uodate Op. Just look after yourself

Housingwoes · 18/11/2018 08:45

Thinking of you OP and hope you got the result you wanted at your scan yesterday

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