Want to know the sex Vs Dont want to know the sex

[RGPargy]

Bit of a dilema here.

This is my second pg and i really want to know the sex of the baby so that, if it's a girl, i can "prepare" myself for having a girl (i have a DS).

My DP however (this is his first child) doesn't want to know the sex of the baby because he wants it to be a surprise, although he knows exactly what i mean about preparing for a girl (he's got ideas of taking a little DS to footie, out fishing etc etc).

He said that he "did" have his heart set on not knowing the sex and now i feel a bit rotten about wanting to know. We agreed that we would get the sonographer to write it down and give it to me, but then DP said that if he knew i knew the sex, he would badger me til i spilled the beanz to him.

Shall i just not find out or find out and refuse to tell him with the possibility of it slipping out anyway?

i reckon if you get the sonography to put it in an evelope - he couldnt hold his own piss

I want to find out the sex too, but DH doesn't. I am not even allowed to have the slip of paper as he knows that I wouldn;t be able to keep it to myself

What about if i just get the sonographer to write it down, let me look at it, then tear up the paper so DP couldn't see it lol.

But he will badger you to tell him. I know that I will slip up and tell DH or someone else and they will slip up.

it is a dilemma indeed! however, i think your DP is asking a bit too much: he doesnt want to find out but also knows he cant stop himself from asking you if you know what the sex is. perhaps his mind is not totally made up about this one.

i know a LOT of people out there likes the surprise. i dont understand whats the surprise is about... i mean... once the baby has its sex formed inside of your belly is not like is going to change it by the time is born? so the surprise only makes sense up to the point you have a scan, after that, whether you close your eyes or not, the sex is already defined!

so yes, im pro-finding out the sex before the baby is born

He might badger me, yes, but i'm good at keeping schtum!

Also, we keep referring to the bump as "he" anyway so if it IS a boy, it wont make any difference and if it's a girl, i'll just have to remember to call her a him until she pops out!

Jabuti - he said the other day that he felt like it was cheating nature a bit by finding out, bless him. I do think he is undecided about it all too.

I want to know for the same reasons RG. Dh wants to know as well but I know he won't be able to keep his mouth shut and i don't want everyone else knowing. I am teasing him that I'll find out but not tell him

hmmmmmmm... sounds like his argument is weakening, maybe you can work on him a bit! we are all cheating on nature anyway by having scans and finding out how the baby is doing.

lol exactly Pixiefish! Plus if it's a girl, i'm gonna have to get used to the idea of me having to do all this girly stuff with her, like baking and doing sparkly pink barbie stuff. Oh lord!!

That's very true Jabuti - i might use that one on our next discussion

I think i might be able to crack him but at the same time i dont want him to feel disappointed about knowing if he really doesn't want to.....

I have a dd RG and really really want another girl As does dh so we'll have to prep ourselves if its a boy

i found out what all 4 of mine were, dh didnt want to know so i didnt tell anybody else. i tried to wind him up, saying i know i know, but he didnt take the bait and it was a secret till they popped out

Did he ever ask you, harley?

nope, he was totally certain he didnt want to know with any of them

That must obviously have made it so much easier for you then!!

dh wasnt the problem, it was my parents, sis & mates that badgered me every day. didnt trust any of them not to let it slip

lol blimey, you must have had to be REALLY strong to keep from telling them!

I didn't find out and it's good I didn't as I wanted a son - had I found that I was having a daughter, I would probably have felt a bit gutted. When she was born, I saw her gender for myself and it was fine .

I've known people where the woman knows the sex but the father is in suspense - seemed a bit pointless to me. I'd want it to either be 100% surprise or not at all. No half-way houses for me .

We didn't mind either way, and if there had been no test wouldn't have been bothered.
But we didn't like the idea that it was known and we weren't told.

i am too impatient for my own good tho. for me, it was lovely to know if i was carrying a girl or boy. would still find out, if i was to do it all again

I really want a boy this time, and I know if its another girl (I have 2 girls and 1 boy) I will have to get my head around it fast. Everyone thinks this is a boy, I am erring toward boy but want to know for sure.

I even tried to say that if we found out the sex, DH could name the baby.. but he didn;t accept the bait. I have just under 2 weeks to work on him before my scan

I am definite "Keep it a Surprise" girl. To me, finding out is like opening your Christmas presents in May!