More Christmas Cake! Pregnancy after loss (thread 3)

[SpongeBobGrannyPants]

New thread!

Lovely @CobaltRose
I too discovered my first MMC at 12 week scan- it had stopped at 9w4 so I just want to hurry up and get past 10w!!
6weeks on Monday and it can't come fast enough!
Loving seeing all these perfect healthy scans tho! Gives me hope!!!

Totally agree with you @zarala these scans do give you hope. It's an amazing pic @CobaltRose - just beautiful.

I'm 6+2 today...seems like such a long time until my scan (early one when I'll be 8+6)...hoping all is well in there. So hard to know and just trust it is after an MMC. I WILL STAY POSITIVE!!! (Well, I'll try!)

@Laney79 we're all staying positive with you. xxx

And @zarala!

Thanks @HidCat

So my first scan is on Wednesday- I'll be 6w3
But I've just found out my dh won't be able to come with me and my sister is away! And I haven't told anyone else about this new pregnancy and it's making me more anxious now

I am sure it will be ok- but because I saw a heart beat a 6 weeks and at 7.5weeks before - I know that even seeing a heartbeat on Wednesday isn't going to be all that reassuring...

Ah! I haven't told my dh how I feel yet- I just feel like he thinks I am being silly 😔 but I think I have to tell him tonight and see whether he can change his work plans - but I also feel he is scared to come with me to the scans because he was at the last 2 MMC scans (12 weeks and 8 weeks) so I also wondering if he is avoiding it!

Ahh sorry for rant! Just needed to let off some anxiety to people who would understand!
Just want to know what's going to happen in the next 8 weeks...hate the not knowing....

@zarala it's such a shame that you could end up going on your own. Would your midwife come with you? Try to think of each scan as a tiny milestone, as in the scan showed showed things are ok for now and that's good. That seems to be getting most people through.

@zarala I'm so excited for you. Have everything crossed for you. Random thing I did with the scans was pick a lucky outfit. Silly I know but I've worn it to every scan so far and it will stretch to fit my up until my last scan around 32 weeks. But just a little piece of comfort incase Dh can't be there with you. Small things. Sending hugs. Xx

@zarala I’m another one that has either my lucky clothes or something else with me to psychologically make it all a little easier for me. I hope it goes well.

Thanks guys - I'm feeling a bit better after my last post. Sometimes just helps to write things down!

@Cakelaur @LilacIris lucky outfit is a good one! I'll think of something to bring with me...

@HidCat yes definitely trying to focus on the milestones- each day that passes I feel an achievement- but the weekly milestones are my main focus now. Especially as I pass the dates of when my previous MCs happened. Tomorrow 5w6 is when my very first one happened- so once I reach Monday that will be good.

There's a French movie called La Haine which came out in mid 90s, it starts off with a guy falling out of a window and he keeps repeating - jusqu'ici tout va bien (basically means so far so good ) so this has been my mantra.

Jusqu'ici tout va bien. Jusqu'ici tout va bien....

The quote ends with him saying

It's not the fall that matters, it's the landing....

So until I know for sure where/how I'll be landing- I just have to enjoy the ride.... and deal with how I land when I have to!

@zarala I hope you've felt able to tell DH how you feel, and that he understands your worries even if he can't come to the scan itself - particularly given what you've both been through in the past. It sounds so stressful having to deal with all these emotions on your own.

Sending you love and praying it all goes well for you x

@kiltedsheep no I didn't tell him! He decided to recite bits from the satanic bible to me 🙄😬 and then we proceeded to have a bit of an argument / debate about how to bring up our kid(s) 😒
Hahaha
So ridiculous! I am going to tell him tomorrow though for sure- it just was quite a surreal evening

But thank you so much! 🙏🏽

@zarala if it helps I went to my 12 and 20 week scan alone as we live 150 miles from our nearest family member who we trust to babysit.

I was a whole new level of nervous but knew I could text hubby once out and ring him a few minutes later once I had my notes back.

The sonographer each time was so supportive and I found at the 20 week scan spoke to me loads about what she could see.

The reality once I was in the room was so much easier than I worked it up to be.

If logistics mean you can't both be there can you try change the scan time or date?

Or you can book a private scan at a later date where you can both go?

Going alone may not be as bad as you fear

Ladies I'm scared.

Just had brown cm when I went to the loo. Light brown, but definitely there. I'm 6+3 today.

I don't know what to do.

@Laney79
Brown blood is old blood Hun so maybe somethings irritated you?

@Alicejj8x that's the thing-we haven't DTD or anything since the BFP. After my MMC we're so desperate for it not to happen again. The only thing I can think is that I've had a really stressful week.
Like I said its light brown-but I'm really scared that it means something bad.

@Laney79
Oh I can understand hun but just try and stay calm.. if red bloods start to appear do you have a number for Mw you can ring or 111?

I am praying it's just old blood and it goes away soon it's such a worry thou isn't it. I've had 2 MMC so I understand xx

@Patienceofatoddler thanks- yes I think I just need to put my big girl pants on! Was feeling a bit wobbly yesterday but today I'm ok!
Just feeling impatient !

@Laney79 try not to worry hun- as the other ladies said brown blood is old blood and hopefully just your body cleaning itself and nothing more sinister...if you are worried you can always go to the EPU tomorrow and ask for a reassurance scan. Keep us posted 💕

@zarala so glad your feeling better.

It's so horrible I know - I certainly felt the idea of it was more scary than reality of it but of course that's easy to say afterwards.

Hope OH can change his work though.

Hello ladies can I ask when do you usually get your first scan

@Laney79 as others have said, brown blood is old and probably left over implantation bleed, I had a smear at the same time and all is well. Stay strong!

@Lilimum4 NHS is a dating scan around 12 weeks and anomaly scan around 20 weeks.

@HidCat @zarala @Alicejj8x thanks all. Had a little bit more discharge but only minimal. Spoke to EPAU, they've said I can have an early scan if I want one but it would have to be internal and I hate them, find them really traumatic. I'm not getting pain (still getting stretchy/crampy heavy feeling but had that for most of the past two weeks ) and there's no red blood so I'm going to try and hope it's as you say some old blood clearing out...
I just can't handle it if I go for a scan and its inconclusive as its so early on. So I'm going to try and stay positive and hope that My little bow is just spring cleaning in there. Please keep everything crossed for me X

@Laney79
I promise you internals aren't anything to worry about and I've had so so many early on and didn't hurt one bit

At 6+3 your be able to see something on the screen.. my first ever scan was 5weeks and we was
Able to see something then at 5.5 weeks we saw the heart beat but just see how you feel about it and if you wanted an early scan atleast you know you've got that option :)

@zarala when is your scan

@Lilimum4 on Wednesday- I'll be 6w2 or 6w3- depends which app I'm using...