Shock at doctors attitude for reduced movements

[0310Star]

So last night I went to triage for the 2nd time since Tuesday for reduced movements. I am 39+5 FTM and been having stop/start contraction's for 10 days, had 2 sweeps and a scan last week.
Now I have always been under the impression that if you felt something wasn't right that you go in, and yesterday I felt just that so that's what I did. After all, it's not a mistake you can take back if something were to be wrong!!
Midwives were great, monitoring went fine, they then sent on a doctor at the end to discuss what to do next. In walked a male doctor that basically asked me why on earth I was there, my baby had moved during the monitoring so insinuated I was lying, and also said that since I was there Tuesday I had no reason to be there as that gives you a weeks worth of reassurance after each monitoring session?! Not something I have EVER been told before, in fact I've always been told quite the opposite and to go in as much as I felt I needed to!

I'm not the kind of person to let someone else worry me enough not to call even with that shit attitude, but it got me thinking that some women may genuinely be put off going to triage for such instances if they may be potentially met with that kind of attitude! After I stated to him that I've always been advised to go in if I felt something wasn't right I think he realised I wasn't the type to be fobbed off, and I got a reply of 'oh yes always come in if you feel something isn't right as we can put you on the monitor as many times as needed'... quite a change in his opinion all of a sudden...
When we were leaving we saw him walk out with his coat on, so was clearly the end of his shift. Yes he may have had a rubbish shift, but this is the life of my baby we are talking about.

Is this something that has happened to many other people?! I found it quite astonishing to be honest, and with all these threads on here with woman asking whether they should go in or not when they are concerned got me wondering if this is a contributing factor for some women when deciding whether or not to go in?

It's not worth your time or energy 0310Star, don't bother arguing. Just roll your eyes and be glad you don't need to nitpick at pregnant women for not being humble enough on the internet

I said he was a dick, and I’ll say it again. An extended family member lost her baby due to a doctor telling her that RFM were nothing to worry about and her believing him. When it comes to low cost interventions that can potentially save human lives, foetal monitoring is right up there with Pap smears.

OP I don’t know if this is your first child but if not, rest assured that you will be called ‘aggressive’ many more times in the future. Nobody likes a woman who stands up for herself and her children

Really, FlaviaAlbia? This is Mumsnet, not the set of mean girls. I think that’s quite uncalled for but if it makes you feel big or clever then I suppose you should carry on.

Regardless of the doctor “only being human” he gave information that he knew to be wrong and dangerous! The way he backtracked when challenged shows he knew he was wrong. It’s a basic fact. You do not get to react petulantly when you’ve had a bad day in his line of work.

And yes it’s nice to be appreciated at work but if someone gives me what I know to be the wrong advice I am not going to simper and say thank you very much

Righto then

So weird to imply that a woman should be in some way grateful because she wants her baby to be checked and she wants to get correct advice. No way she should
be apologetic or grateful to a man who has given her outrageously incorrect advice. Nothing is 100% until baby is in your arms, unfortunately, and the OP is right to follow the NHS’ own advice to go in whenever she notices reduced movements.

Are you always this aggressive? This is why I also just wondered about the multiple attendances and your attitude and if that played a part here

You did say the OP was aggressive nottaken. I’ve helpfully highlighted that bit for you. Now leave the OP alone. She is the only advocate her baby has, and undermining and trying to make her second guess her decisions is not needed here. She owes nobody a debt of gratitude.

noseoftralee I’ve helpfully screen grabbed the quote you have shared which was written by a different poster.

I did not accuse the op of being aggressive.

Don't worry ladies, no one will change my mind on the course of action if I feel something is wrong, my worry is that there are women out there who won't want to make a fuss and some of the comments on here are only helping to put them off seeking advice through worrying they may be wasting time or made to feel they are over using the NHS..

I will be speaking to my midwife and asking her who I need to contact to lodge a complaint

@NotTakenUsername I apologise, I did think it was you that suggested I was being aggressive so I am sorry for suggesting it was you

nottakenusername oh I sincerely apologise. I’ve just reread the thread and it wasn’t you at all. .

I had forgotten to update the post so thought I best do so now!
My baby girl arrived on the 19th July after quite a long and traumatic birth. I was induced due to the movement issues, I was still a little concerned they thought I was over reacting as again the trace was fine but my labour started off within about an hour of the pessary being inserted and I had around 10 hours of 1 minute apart contractions which was horrendous! Eventually opted for a epidural which was a good choice as they put me on a drip to regulate the contractions a bit better and because I wasn't moving along like they'd hoped and ended up being monitored by all sorts of midwifes and doctors all night as her movements and heart rate were very up and down and they couldn't work out why. They took blood from her head to check oxygen levels and that was fine. By morning I was fully dilated but she was at an awkward angle so I pushed for an hour with no luck, then taken to theatre for attempted forceps by 2 different surgeons, then eventually a section. I found the whole thing extremely difficult to get my head around, and was quite emotional for a couple weeks but we're getting there now!
I must admit, there is a bit of relief i knowing I wasn't just imagining it throughout the end of my pregnancy!
Just goes to show that you should always go with your gut feeling and never let anyone tell you that you're wrong