Obese and pregnant

[Pob13]

Hi,
Hoping to meet some ladies in a similar situation. When I say obese I mean properly obese, not just a bit chubby.
Im size 26 and 7 wks pregnant with my first.
I would really appreciate advice, tips, etc.
Hope to find some new friends.

Well a man touching my belly got me here in the first place....!

I personally have no issue with male medical professionals of any kind. I've dealt with a lot and in my experience most higher level consultants etc. are male although my specialist cardiologist is female (and totally lovely) and my obstetrician is female according to my letter.

My consultant was male and there was a nurse in the room for any internal examination. He did the 20 week scan and then every 2-4 weeks after that.

The weirdest moment with him, was when I was 38 weeks and he was seeing if I was ready to be induced early, so he is rummaging around and talking about how his wife (also a consultant) had very small hands and was very good at lambing sheep surreal moment.

At my consultant appointments not much happened to be honest.
I'd have the usual blood pressure taken and needed to give a urine sample before seeing the Dr. Occasionally I'd be weighed but not every time.
As I had no complications apart from weight they just generally looked through notes, asked if I was feeling OK, etc.
The Dr prescribed the blood thinners at one appointment and most of the others seemed a waste of time. The way I look at it is, the more appointments and monitoring I have, the more likely they are to notice something wrong.
Be prepared for them to mention being high risk at some appointments in one way or another, and talk about potential complications.
They tend to be straight talking and won't pussyfoot around the issue so try not to take it to heart. I already know I'm fat and higher risk so it's not as if it comes as a surprise. I never had bad comments by the way, just factual.
Oh and I've had male and female consultants and neither seemed better than the other to me.

Just had my booking in appointment. She said it is likely i will be induced at 38wks due to diabetes. Has anyone been induced early? Will i and baby have to stay in hospital longer?

Baby is considered full term at 38 weeks. Provided there is no other issues you will probably be discharged as normal. Do you have diabetes or is she predicting you will get GD? They said I would, and I didn't, so just eat well and hopefully all will be fine.

@Belliniteeny ok thanks. Already have it unfortunately.

Hi everyone, my bmi is definitely over 30 and I'm on month 7 of ttc. I've read so many articles saying that this will make it harder to conceive. I feel really upset that it is potentially my fat fault for not having conceived yet and I've developed a bit of fear that if/when we do get pregnant, the doctors will make me feel so ashamed. Please can you tell me whether you've experienced any negativity at doc appointments and also how long it took you to get pregnant? Thanks all, so nice to read your comments on here xxx

I've experienced no negativity but I also don't have an issue with them being medically factual either - I am overweight, it does make it higher risk etc.

I fell pregnant on the first month of trying - that wasn't in the plan hence not losing any weight in advance!

@AnotherOriginalUsername wow that's great - first month! Thanks for your reply

Just been to my first obstetrics appointment. First i saw a midwife and doctor. They were very nice, explaining the extra risks etc. Then I had to see the diabetic team, they were not as nice. Got a bit of a telling off for not doing regular readings this past week. The thing is I have been really unwell this last week so havent eaten much and have been sleeping a lot so my routine is completely out. Obviously i know what i have to do i just felt they were a bit patronising. They were very excited that I had lost a stone in the past 4 weeks. Oh well. Im sure during the pregnancy I will come across nice people and not so nice. Time to grow a thick skin.

All good, due date now 6/12. No mention of weight or BMI but did find this in my scan report

Yes, thick skin all the way. Just keep yourself as happy as possible and eating for two isn't about quantity but about good choices.

You aren't alone, the doctors, midwives, nurses etc are so used to this and know the path for best care.

How's everything going @Pob13 et Al?

@crazygirluk you mentioned you had a csection, can I ask how the healing went? Im expecting to have to go down that route but am worried about the wound healing under my flabby tummy. It's already a bit sweaty under there (sorry for the tmi).

@AnotherOriginalUsername Im ok, how are you? That scan looks good.

I had a scan last week which put me back a week, so Im just 9wks. That means i still have a few weeks before the magical 12. I had a really bad cold last week so was off work feeling very sorry for myself. I have lost 1stone so far, which Im quite pleased about. I havent had nausea for a few days though so hoping i dont go crazy on the food now. Emotionally im not doing great. Im having anxiety that something is going to go wrong, and regularly have thoughts that im too fat to be doing this. Hopefully after 12wks i will be able to relax a bit.

All appears to be well here thanks @Pob13

12 week scan on Friday put me forward a day but baby was very relaxed and curled up so she just kept measuring until she got 2 results the same, although my dates say 5th December, 8 week scan said 7th December and scan last week said 6th December, so all seems pretty accurate.

I am having low level anxiety of just not knowing that everything is ok. I've got no reason to believe it isn't and all was perfectly fine on Friday, it's just the being relatively out of control and things being out of my hands!

When I had my Dd my bmi was 32. I had a csection with her (she was breech). I was stapled closed with internal stitches. The staples were uncomfortable but when getting washed had to be careful to dab the wound rather than rub and same with getting dry. On day 11 after Dd was born the health visitor removed the staples with what I can only describe as pliers! Not painful but uncomfortable.

I think i finally have to give in to the non-wired bras 😭. Can anyone recommend good shops for the big boobed and fat backed? I have looked at simplybe, evans and everything is so ugly for the really big sizes.

M&S maternity range?

Bravissimo. Still not the prettiest but functional for the few months that they are needed

Another (probably stupid) question. Is my fat belly going to squash the baby?!

No it will not. Your tummy will grow to accommodate the bump. Baby will be fine

Hiya... I'm literally new to all this and a size 24/26! We'd planned on not trying until I'd lost weight... OOOPS!

My BMI is about 46, I'm tall (about 5'8") and I'm worried that my weight will really make me struggle. My normally loose-ish pants already feel tight from the bloating!

I looked at the below link and my risk came DOWN when I put my weight in! STRANGE!

datayze.com/miscarriage-chart.php?mode=table

Been to see my cardiologist and another obstetrician today (a gazillion miles away) and all is good on that front. I have a list of "pregnancy risk factors" as long as my arm on paper but my heart function hasn't changed and there's no sign of any damage to my heart either. They've said I should be able to give birth in my local hospital (rather than a gazillion miles away) and they will induce me at 38 weeks (so definitely no chance of a Christmas baby, thank heavens!!)

Trisomy screening is back today too and is low risk so good news all round!

Well ladies. I’ve had my booking in appointment with my midwife today. I’m just ove 8 weeks and it turns out I have a BMI if 47!! I am b you’d fuckong mortified if I’m honest! Feel like I’ve set myself and my baby up for a lot of problems.

The people we’ve told don’t seem to be ‘over the moon’ for us and sort of grimaced which upset me as despite everything, this is a much long for baby and 2.5 years in the making after a M/C. I just feel as though people will be judging me all the way through now. Feel as though I’d be judged less if I smoked 20 a day.

Going to try and lose a bit anyway, can’t do any harm with such a high BMI.

Congratulations @Iswallowtoothpaste!

Try not to feel bad - it is what it is and don't let other people's opinions (or how you perceive their opinions) spoil it for you. You're pregnant so your body is obviously happy for it to work!

Like you say, what matters is what you do now. Healthy diet and gentle exercise is great (if you can - I'm a regular gym goer, 4+ times a week usually, but the first trimester has sapped my energy totally!)

Just because you have certain risk factors, it doesn't mean they'll happen (my list of risk factors in my notes includes 'potential death' - I'm pretty sure that isn't going to happen!) Equally these things can happen to the fittest, healthiest woman too.

Enjoy it for what it is, and just do what you can reasonably do go give your baby the best start. There's plenty of time for losing weight afterwards