I want a early scan... dh is saying no

[Mum8515]

So I'm 6w & want a early scan but dh is saying to wait until our 12week scan.

To listen to him or book a scan anyway?

12 weeks is a long time to wait!
But I have had a normal scan at 6 weeks and went on to have a MMC. If you can hold out to 8/9 weeks and everything is Ok then you have a much better chance of everything continuing to be OK.
Congratulations on your pregnancy!

Yeah if you have one I'd go for the 8 or 9 week mark as anything earlier can be nerve wracking. I had one when I thought I was 6 weeks and they couldn't see anything - had to wait another week and turns out my dates were wrong everything was fine. I spent the week so anxious!

Book one! I had one at 7 weeks and it was so reassuring to see a little bean with a heart beating away! Definitely calmed the nerves

It was our favourite most special scan! Made me realise I was t making it up... So incredibly surreal seeing a bean with a heartbeat. Make me feel warm just remembering that moment (ok I suppose you'd get it at 12wks if it was your first scan!)

We waited until 7.5weeks as I knew then that a false negative was unlikely and a heartbeat was a positive predictive indicator.

I still love looking at that pic. We went out for dinner afterwards and I remember I just kept looking at it under the table, grinning like a maniac at our little secret

Obviously you and your dh need to compromise on this but I would wait til around 8 weeks if I were you. There's more to see then.

They don't need to compromise. There's only one person gets to decide here.

Book it. He doesn’t have to go. Your body, you can scan it all you please

Yes, book it for 8or 9 weeks. I had mine and it was lovely. You could see the baby twitching and the heart beat. I found it very reassuring. At 7 weeks you won’t able to see so much. I found it has also helped me bond with this little growing person.
I have had bad experiences with early scan in previous pregnancies before so to have a later one and see arms and legs was lovely! Do it!!! X

If you can easily afford it then I guess why not?
I only had an early (7week) scan with my third due to complications, it's not really a baby shape at that point though, just a bean really.
Why doesn't he want an early scan?

Personally I wouldn't. I know so may people who've had 'reassurance' scans which were anything but. 12 weeks seems a long time, but most of pregnancy is just waiting!

If you really want it, then go for it, but take any reassurance with a massive slug of salt.

I really wouldn't - not saying it to put a downer but the risk off miscarriage in the first 12weeks is high ! Which Is why they say to wait also the dates are inaccurate before then too! I would just wait xxx

Maybe try and explain to him why it is so important to you and why you don't want to wait. It probably doesn't feel at all real to him at this early stage and maybe he hasn't stopped to consider it from your point of view.

I had my first scan at 7 weeks and it was quite touching to listen to the heartbeat. I think it's a lovely thing to do but I wouldn't say it's particularly reassuring.

Which one of you is pregnant?

If it’s him then of course he can decide when to have a scan.

If money is at all tight I would agree with him.
I’d also agree with pp who said wait until at least 8/9weeks - that might be a good compromise if you can afford it. 6weeks is very early and the reassurance will be short lived.
But I’m of the, “what’s for you won’t go by you” mindset so that isn’t to everyone’s taste.

8 weeks much better timing than 6 IME. Providing you can afford it the choice is entirely yours: it’s your body.

At around £40-50 I think that’s not much to pay for reassurance. I’d go around 8/9 weeks too though if you can wait til then.
It’s a lovely thing to look at a child and know you saw them when they were millimetres big/small... mind blowing really!

Which one of you is pregnant?
Oh I don’t like that attitude. Different when it’s a decision about a birth plan or something. But for an additional, unnecessary scan that will be paid for with family money I do think both partners should get a say. Op hasn’t said there is any basis for her desire to get an additional scan, and presumably if there was the nhs would be offering it. However if she had, for example, suffered issues in previous pregnancies, that may change my view.

Op has not said that they pool money. If she can afford it, £100 perhaps, it’s 100% her choice.

I would say wait until at least week 9 or 10 I had mine early and it's not worth the stress or money.

If they don’t pool money and op still thinks she needs his approval then they have bigger problems than not having an extra scan.

I had one at 7 weeks (the same week as previous mc)
My hub was all for it but if he wasn't I'd have done it anyway.
I needed that scan for my sanity, although I had a panic attack before she could do it.

I would book it, tell him and say 'I love you, please come with me'

Xx

I think mine was about £70 and best money I've ever spent

Hi Ladies, thank you for all your replies.
I just want a reassurance scan, want to see my little bean & get overly excited I guess. Hubby doesn't see that point because he's not carrying, he says we should wait until 12wk+ when we can see more.
Money isn't a worry when it comes to things like this, I am happy to pay... with his money of course
Had some spotting a little while ago (red blood) so a lovely lady as suggested I call my local early pregnancy unit first thing tomorrow, may even get to see my little bean then... hoping everything is okay xx

Go for it OP. I had a scan and 7+2. Saw the heartbeat and reassured me that the pregnancy is currently going well. Best £50 I ever spent!

NotTaken I don't need his approval, would just be nice of him to agree with me getting the scan done if that's what I want... it's not about money either