Unfriendly users!

[sunandfire]

Don't get me wrong, there are a bunch of helpful, polite women on here, but why are so many of them the opposite? The moment you express a view that's a little out of the ordinary or unconventional (in a completely innocent, polite way, mind you), they can become really blunt and quite horrible. I don't have this problem with other groups/online forums I'm on - only Mumsnet. Any little thing I mention about nutrition, lifestyle, medicine etc (in a completely harmless and respectful manner), they'll interpret as malicious in some way and respond with all this rudeness and sarcasm, which I really don't understand. Sarcasm seems to be a particular favourite amongst users. It's not a very welcoming community, I don't find - not unless you fit a very specific box of thinking. I didn't realise women had it in them to be so blunt and unfriendly. Never before, either online or in real life, have I come across such a bitter, 'chip on their shoulder' community of women. If this isn't your experience, I'm glad, but unfortunately it's been mine. I dunno, maybe I'm just a millennial 'snowflake'...

Anyway, I think I'll get off this and stick to my other groups/forums. I always click off the app feeling confused, frustrated and misunderstood... :/

@QueenAravisOfArchenland @anotherchangetomyname I definitely wouldn't be suited for any "aww hun" community. Wanting people to be polite/respectful isn't at all the same as wanting them to be sugar-coaty, girly and unable to offer anything of substance.

Well that sounds sensible sun. I suppose posters might just read STREP B IN PREGNANCY and I DON'T WANT ANTIBIOTICS on a thread and assume you're being very foolish or niave? Strep b can be very dangerous.

I don't like it when a thread suddenly turns into pages of posters piling on to attack the Op I must admit. I don't think that's indicative of the whole of mumsnet.

I got a few nasty comments on one of my first threads here when I was working as a mother's help and asked a question about bottle prep. I got told I should be sacked and I was an interfering old bag I felt really shaky and upset but persevered and the thread turned round and I did get some helpful responses.

@BossWitch ok, well that's the very 'unnecessarily rude' kind of comment I'm referring to. I think some people must just enjoy the thought of making someone feel bad. The block capitals were used because I couldn't get the hang of how to use the italics.

You are way too sensitive! Most of the Internet is a lot harsher than mumsnet! How on earth have you survived out there?

You need to use ^ before and after the word (no spaces) for italics.

Block caps = shouting. Avoid.

you will get opinions you don’t like and it doesn’t mean they are being mean. Come on, it’s an adult forum. Nobody signed up to holding hands and singing kumbaya together... Some people can’t be bothered or don’t feel the need trying to find nicer way to say things, and that’s okay.

@FissionChips I actually don't come into contact with people much ruder than the women on here - not directly being rude to me, anyway. So, that's my experience.

Earlier I made the catastrophic mistake of admitting to taking my kids to McDonald's occasionally. Hell hath no fury like a Mumsnetter who doesn't 'believe' in nuggets.

@FranticallyPeaceful people have to try to find a nicer way to say things? That's beyond me, and kind of sad (as in unfortunate, not pathetic)! Being polite just comes naturally to me - I'd actually have to put effort into being rude/disrespectful. Anyway...

You say you have to put effort into being rude and disrespectful, yet you’ve started this thread to call the other users of the pregnancy board rude bullies. Right.

Pot, this is the kettle. I believe you two have met.....

@FranticallyPeaceful also, 'opinions you don't like' are one thing, but rudeness is another. You can rudely agree with someone, or politely disagree with someone. I was referring to the rudeness.

“I didn't realise women had it in them to be so blunt and unfriendly.”

What?? 😕

@FenellaMaxwellsPony yes, and how is that being rude/disrespectful? You've worded it in a name-calling way ('rude bullies'), not me.

You have deliberately posted this here, in the wrong section, because you want the users to feel bad - how is that not rude?

I hardly got to page 2 before you started getting on my nerves. Hope that's not too rude.

@FenellaMaxwellsPony no, I merely wanted to bring this to their attention, not make them 'feel bad'. I'd have worded my post very definitely if that was my intention.

@Viviennemary well, I hope you felt accomplished by leaving that comment.

Really op, no one is going to change how they respond because of your telling off. This thread wil just be one giant pisstake .
Just name change and move on or find a forum more suited to your sensitivity.

@FissionChips I can see that, yes! It's weird, because on here I'm going to seem like this super sensitive person who needs to find another forum, but on other forums where the people aren't rude/impolite/unnecessarily sarcastic, my 'sensitivity' needs are met without question and I don't end up feeling like 'the sensitive person' who needs special treatment! 😃 so, I'm stuck with the question "Am I actually 'sensitive' or are the women on here just unusually impolite?" I will never know. Anyway, I'm gonna leave this here now...

Well, there's one of you and thousands of mumsnetters, so...

Massive difference between not being nice enough appease gentle little kittens online and being rude. Seriously.

I've Advanced Searched your posts, and I really can't see what you're on about.

There have been mostly positive and supportive comments to anything you have posted, with a lot of advice and help.

One or two might have disagreed with you/your actions, but that doesn't mean they're being unfriendly!

I still agree that people don’t need to be unnecessarily rude. But having now seen what it is that you are upset about, FYI-

I don’t think you were wise to not take antibiotics because it turned out you didn’t have strep UTI. You would have been wise to take them just in case until strep ruled out. Your tiny miniscule impact on antibiotic resistance is not comparable to the risks that strep could pose to your baby.

Coming from someone whose baby had neonatal meningitis. And who is also a doctor.

I would implore you to not take risks again with your baby

@BIWI it's because I've made whole new accounts.

I do think there are a lot of angry people on here. I'm sure there's more going on with them, they can't possibly be that angry over a post on the internet