Things no-one tells you

[Paie]

Nobody told me that it is possible to have morning sickness 24/7, right up until actually giving birth thankfully this pregnancy is smoother!

This time it's hurting loads to sneeze or cough- which is apparently normal!

Tell me yours

Vaginal varicose veins. Who knew they were a thing?!

@franticallypeaceful pepperami 😂😂😂 oh my goodness. Yeah my pregnancy farts are like swamp monsters but it's ok cause they don't make me sick. My partners on the other hand made me sick through my nose. It must have looked like a horror film. We move house this weekend onto a farm... I sense this might not be the best idea 😂

So many things!

That 'morning' sickness isn't reserved for mornings, nor for the first trimester! And that even with cyclizine stopping the actual vomiting, you can still have constant nausea.

The horrendous constipation, despite guzzling gallons of prune juice.

Round ligament pain. And pain when, sneezing, coughing, moving in slightly the wrong direction...

The fact that, because everything softens up, if you turn your ankle you will really damage it. And then inevitably tweak it again when there's snow in March...

That, if you don't have an obvious bump, people will continuously ask stupid questions about whether you're sure your dates are right.

The frustration of not being able to keep up with your pre-pregnancy self at work. This last one has probably been the worst for me, because I'm usually very tough on myself, and I feel like an abject failure Fortunately, all my colleagues are amazing, and the pressure is all from me, not from them at all!

That you still can’t lie on your front for ages after giving birth.

Gagging when brushing your teeth. I already hate brushing my teeth because it can cause an onset of excess drooling but now this gagging and heaving. Hate it.

That you have to keep dry crackers/nibbles next to the bedside and actually want to eat when feel sick.

Oh and i didnt realise my fanny would swell up before giving birth. Thank god i cant see it.

Nobody told me you could get stretch marks after giving birth and they can all come out afterwards....just when you think you’ve escaped unscathed.

Oh and giant man burps that give the local football team after a few pints a run for their money.

That your boobs not only may be saggy etc after birth but for some of us unlucky ones ... Breast tissue goes and you're boobs are way smaller than before... Gutting when you're small to begin with 😕

Not being able to concentrate for a few minutes, never mind a few hours to read those 9000 baby/pregnancy related books you end up buying.

As cute as you may look in your maternity outfits, when you’re naked you resemble an overweight silverback gorilla with huge milk jugs resting on your belly. This comes with the proper legs spread and bent pose and everything, because sitting down with your legs closed is a ridiculous concept at this point.

You may have been told of pregnancy moodiness but were never told it usually involves you feeling like the entire world is crumbling because somebody did something you didn’t like, which makes you moan about it for a good few days, which then makes you feel like you’re losing your mind, which then makes you anxious that you’re losing your mind. Pregnancy moodiness soon becomes pregnancy madness.
Also knowing what you originally moaned about is ridiculous and you were wrong but still continuing to fight your corner regardless, because backing down seems impossible at this point.

..... on the bright side, how fun is being able to clean your belly button when it’s pushed out? I feel like it’s therapy for a life time of wondering if it’s clean properly or not

All of the above, plus the involuntary grunting when getting up, sitting down, walking... I feel so pretty

@MooChops89 “huuuggghhhhh” “ugh” “HURRGGH... oh my God that hurt” is pretty much all people hear around me during the day anymore

Mines after giving birth - the blood clots! Obviously I knew I would bleed a lot but it was described to me as a heavy period. I thought my organs were falling out of my body I rang the alarm in the hospital toilets

The night dribbling, the leaky boobs, and the vaginal discharge (with accompanying 'on heat' craziness. Poor DH). Basically all the leaking bodily fluids. The third on that list once saw me get home from a longish car journey and have to change my knickers AND trousers It was quite a wet patch, and I was definitely not leaking amniotic fluid my imagination may have been working in overdrive

I'm glad to hear that the excessive drooling at night will disappear, I'm pretty sure I could drown myself without too much difficulty!

Definitely regarding swamp minge, panty liners are now a daily staple.

Also, didn't realise that my areolas would start to take over my whole chest... It's like I've got new nipples growing everywhere