Two babies born 12 months apart - tips please!

[AutumnLeavesandCandleLights]

Hello!

I fell pregnant around 14-15 weeks after our first son was born. Our second baby is due just three weeks after our DS turns one.

I've currently only got 12 weeks left of this pregnancy and although I'm obviously excited to meet the little love inside of me, to watch my first DS become a big brother and see the pair of them grow up together and I am, to be frank, shitting myself.

I've struggled over the past 10 months with DS. He wakes up A LOT still throughout the night and isn't the greatest day time napper.
He's quite a clingy baby and I'm beginning to grow concerned how I'm going to juggle him and a new born in just a couple of months time!

Also, I'm worried about the new baby waking my DS up in the night just after I've managed to get him off to sleep. Once the new baby is 6 months old, the two of them will share a room so if any of you have any general tips, tricks and advice on how to survive life with two babies so close together, please fire them my way!

Anything from routines you've tried to generally balancing your day between a one year a old and a tiny baby will be greatly appreciated!

Mine are 12 months and 1 day apart !! I was 18 with DS and 19 with second DS and I was panicking lol. I was in hospital with a 12 month old and 1 day old baby 🙈. All I can say is try not to worry too much about how you will cope, I worried like mad and even planned how I was going to deal with two kids soo close together, like getting up to give my 1 year old a bottle then gettin up 3x to give newborn bottle and nappie changes etc. Once baby was born I didn't even stick to what I had planned I just went with the flow and took it day by day. I'd keep my oldest in his routine by trying to give him his breakfast dinner tea all at same sorta times and putting him to bed at 7.30 every night and then gettin up to him at like 2 in the morning to give him a bottle. Where as with my newborn I would just feed and change him when I needed to and I went to bed a lot earlier so I wouldn't lose out on too much sleep. Instead of going to bed at 11 I would go to bed at 9 and just get up every 2-3hours with newborn then once or twice with eldest. The first 3 months were hard and I was tired but partner helped out a lot and was very good at doing a night feed sometimes. I can promise you tho it gets a lot easier lol just make sure you look after yourself and rest and eat and drink when you can, I cannot cope without sleep so I made sure I went to bed early. My boys are now 3 and 4 and they are so incredibly close they adore each other and love playing together and eating tea toghether and I wouldn't change anything about them now, I'm glad I had them when I did. Even to this day I still keep them in a routine of putting them to bed at same sorta time. Itl just come naturally to you when your next one is born and you'll think to yourself, right, I'm guna give eldest breakfast then feed newborn then have my breakfast then get them both dressed then maybe put a load of washing on and you honestly get yourself in a manageable routine that suits you in the end, the time FLYs by and they will be 4 years old before you no it lol. It so special having kids so close together and like I said I would not change a thing I'm glad there 12 months apart. I did have bad days where I'd be like fuck I cant cope with newborn waking up every 3 hours then other child waking up then newborn waking up again, I was like omg I soo tired but I learned to go bed earlyier and have a nap at some point in the day if they did. You honestly will just no at the time what to do, like I said I wouldn't myther to much because you don't no what's it guna be like. Just remember tho that the newborn will be 1 year old before you no it and the night feeds and all that don't last forever aha. People ask me how I coped and I say well I just did I got on with it like any good mother would, you do what you gotta do for your kids, and if you are struggling then ask for help it's that simple. I adore my boys now and they have the closest relationship ever, I would actually love to have another two children close together. Good luck tho :) and congratulations x

By the way try not to let your eldest have to many naps in the day, and maybe try getting him to bed at like 7 or 8 if you can. If he does wake in the night maybe get your partner to deal with him while you deal with newborn. Iv had both kids crying in the night and waking each other up and it was so stressful but I just calmed eldest down gave him a bottle and then fed newborn and I'd be feeding him then winding him, the id change his nappy if I needed to then put him to bed then I'd go to bed and try and get to sleep, it's hard some days but you will get In a routine and you'll get to no ur baby's ways the more the days pass. Ino you dread them waking eachother up but they get used to it and will soon sleep through it, maybe keep baby in with you for first 9 -12 months then see how it goes with them sharing a room x

Try contacting your local Home-Start if you have one. They'll send a trained, DBS'd volunteer round once a week for 2 hours so you can - sleep, sort stuff out, spend 1:1 time with either child, go to appointments, have an adult conversation with a non judgemental listener etc etc. Fantastic charity.