Help!

[Lolabelle]

I have been highly recommended Gina Fords 'Contented Little baby Book' by numerous people malke and female young and old and although reading it is hard work I am thinking that if it makes my life easier in the long run surely it is worth it - has anyone else read it as I am due to be a first time mum around August 30th and not sure what to do!! Help!!

Hi Lolabelle, I read this book when DS was about 4 weeks (he's now 4 years) personally I thought some of it was dreadful but the routines really worked for me and I swear DS had read it too! However, GF is very belittling if you don't have the right sort of cot/bedding/equipment ect so I chose to ignore that bit, I also was a complete failure on the breast feeding bit but so what, DS was thriving on a bottle so no need to worry. GF seems to raise a lot of controversy but I think you can select the bits you want and make them work. Iwould say it's definately worth a read even if you don't agree with all she says.

Flick through the Baby Whisperer and Penelope Leach too - and decide which suits your general lifestyle and personality best. IME Gina Ford suits some people down to the ground, and is an anathema to others. Just because any approach has worked for one person doesn't mean that it will feel right for you....remember this the first time you feel guilty or a failure because things aren't going to the perfect plan!

Thanks for your advice - its so hard trying to plan what to do without even knowing what having a baby will be like but i wil definitely take some of the stuff she says on board as some of it makes good sense but the stuff about breastfeeding seems so complicated its enough to exhaust you before you even start!

I think I am just sold by the promise that this routine will definitely get your baby sleeping through the night as the thought of having to get up every few hours morifies me!! Plus I am confused as it advises me to put the baby in his/her room from day one but i just feel so wierd doing this straight away and EVERYONE says the baby will be sleeping in my room for the first 6 months approx and so i am stuck!! I like her theory that by letting the baby sleep in its own room from day one you are establishing a routine and it won't be such a trauma trying to get the baby to sleep alone when 6 months old but it seems every other Tom, Dick & Harry thinks sleeping in the room with the mother at first makes the best sense - God I'm confused!!

You won't know what's right for you and your baby until you have that baby in your arms. Even then you'll probably be unsure!! You may find that Gina Ford is far too strict for you, your baby and your lifestyle but you can still pick bits out of the book that you can work into your own routine.

Personally, I think you'll find that having the baby in your room is far more convenient for night feeds than having to get up and traipse to the nursery and back again.

I haven't read all of GF but I think even she accepts that having the baby in your room is going to make life easier at first for night feeds and general peace of mind.
However she recommends letting the baby have its daytime naps in its own room in order to get used to it.
Practically though you will probably find that it does a lot of its napping in the buggy, car seat etc whilst you're out and about. I think if you follow GF too rigidly you do end up rather housebound and IMO getting out, fresh air, meeting people etc is crucial to your sanity.

Second Soupdragon on that and even took it a step further - I refused to get out of bed at night let alone walk to another room and had the baby next to the bed, and all the nappy changing stuff to hand too! Dh got used to it pretty quickly, and slept through it all to the extent he had to see the number of nappy bags the next day to know how many times we'd been up...

I found GF helpful, but only took what I wanted from it, rather than sticking to it religiously. Started from about 6-7 weeks, and found the sleep routines seemed to fit with dd's bodyclock immediately. But certainly didn't get worked up about whether dd was doing things exactly how and when the book said. Found GF easier than the baby whisperer.

I too have had a lot of mixed feedback on GF, her routines do look good for feeding and sleeping though. She strongly recommends black out blinds but when the baby gets used to that it won't sleep anywhere but in a pitch black room.

Lolabelle, I feel like you also, it's my first and can be very confusing.

Crumpet, with everything that has been in the papers lately on co-sleeping and SIDS, didn't that worry you?

Right so deffo start with baby in room seems the general agreement?? I think I'll be so worried about whether or not he/she is okay i'll end up getting up to see her constantly anyway so that makes sense and as long as i get her/him in the routine after about 6 weeks then that should be a good time to start the GF way and see if it suits me??

GF suggests feeding the baby last feed at midnight and next one at 6am and that seems to apply from the minute the baby comes home from hospital so surely no such thing as 'night feeds' or have i got this whole thing wrong??!! God i feel SUCH a novice!!!

I bought GF (I'm a first timer) and by the third chapter I was a jibbering wreck! Much as I'd like to get db into a routine when he arrives I'm hoping to do as all wise MNs say and take the bits of GF that suit me. Personally, I'd like to get db in his own room from as early as poss and that is what GF says to do. However, if we decide that doesn't work for us then I won't do it. My friend who had twin boys at the beginning of the year loves GF (she did "on demand" for number 1 and that didn't work for her) but she's a very matter of fact/routine person. I have a feeling I will be a hormonal lump of jelly when db actually arrives so my New Baby Resolution is to go with what feels right and to try not to feel like a failure if things go "wrong" (ie not according to GF/baby whisperer).

It's a shame that dbs can't read GF or whatever book we chose before they are born!

Lolabelle (cool name BTW!)

it's my understanding that wee sprogs need fed every 2-3hours in the first few weeks, especially to get your milk going in the first place.

Don't know after 6 weeks though - anyone? Is a 6 hour sleep reasonable at that stage? (please, please!!!!!!!!!!)