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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

When is the right time to have a baby?

12 replies

Amynicole93 · 14/04/2017 21:56

Me and my partner currently rent a flat, we're saving for a mortgage but it's going to take at least a few years. We really want a baby, would we be able to manage trying for a baby first?
I know there's never a right time to have a baby as there's always gonna be something that will put it on hold.

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Hellmouth · 14/04/2017 21:59

Well how old are you? Could you afford to have a baby and save?

DS was unplanned, but my credit rating is shot so buying a house was never going to happen within the next few years anyway!

NSEA · 14/04/2017 22:00

Now is the answer. There is never a right time financially. However, if you want one have one. If you wait for the best time it will never happen.

AgainstTheOddsNo2 · 14/04/2017 22:01

Babies are expensive and it may put your deposit back a bit. Bit if you have thought it all though and think you would be ok then it is your choice.

When we had dd we were in a 1 bed flat (which we owned) and didn't move out till she was 3 1/2. It was honestly fine!

Original poster

Amynicole93 · 14/04/2017 22:05

Yeahh this is what Ive heard people say, that if you wait for the right time it will never be there.
I'm 24, we're getting married in August, I've always said I want to be married first.
We both work full time, obviously me staying at home will be a bit tight.

Is there any help we could get even though my fiancé works full time?

OP posts:

arbrighton · 14/04/2017 22:08

You'll get maternity pay, child benefit, and depending on your family income, might be eligible for tax credits or free nursery hours later on.

0live · 14/04/2017 22:09

Are you sure you want to stay at home ? It will really affect your career prospects, your savings and your pension. And if you and your partner spilt up , you will struggle to bring up your kids alone.

Sorry to mention this but you need to be practical and not romantic if you are going to have kids and the odds are 50:50.

If you were my DD I would advise you to wait.

Original poster

Amynicole93 · 14/04/2017 22:09

How do you check all that? Cause I briefly looked into it before but it asked me how much I've earned over so many years, but why does that matter? I thought it would just be what you're on now?

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Original poster

Amynicole93 · 14/04/2017 22:11

I don't want to stay at home forever, I mean while pregnant and just after birth

OP posts:

0live · 14/04/2017 22:17

Most women go to work when pregnant. If you work in a job like contruction that may be hard In late pregnancy then your employer will find alternative work for you.

What's your job?

eurochick · 14/04/2017 22:20

It sounds like you really need to do some research. What maternity pay will you get? How long do you want to take? Will your partner take any shared parental leave? Are you entitled to benefits? Will you both want to go back full time? What will your childcare costs be? What are your living costs now (rent, bills, council tax, car expenses, food, travel, etc)? Can you afford to cover those with one of you on leave?

Emma2803 · 14/04/2017 22:25

There's no right time for a baby but personally if I was in your situation I would wait, save a bit and get sorted and then go for it. Your 24 so relatively young in the grand scheme of things, once baby comes it is very hard to save, do that now for a few years, get your deposit saved, enjoy your first few years as a married couple together and then go for it.
I think if you were 34 I would say it's a different story but at 24 time is definitely still on your side.

sailorcherries · 15/04/2017 04:21

I'm 24 and OH and I ntnp with this current pregnancy.
We had already put a deposit down on a house (which we now live in) both worked full-time and have a decent joint income (circa 45-48k per year, central belt in Scotland).

However, I already done the math and knew we could afford me to go on maternity leave until Christmas (starting mat leave on Tuesday, using annual leave atm) but I'd need to work full-time after that. I already have one DS, who was born when I was 17, and know we aren't eligible for any additional help aside from child benefit which made it easier to financially plan.

The actual topic of baby making came up in a conversation when I decided to get the coil removed, albeit not for baby making purposes. We spoke at length about how we'd manage and how we didn't want a huge age gap between the kids. I also wasn't ovulating after coil removal, and didn't bleed at all but somehow caught 3.5 months after. I had problematic periods before then and went long times without so we initially thought it would be a while.

You really need to sit down and do the math, decide whether a baby is feasible at this point in time (emotionally and financially). If you need any help with benefits and tax credits the entitledto website is great and you only need to know your net income and your partners net income from the last fiscal year, otherwise a trip to the local cab office might be worth it.

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