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Pregnancy and work .

18 replies

MuvaWifey77 · 21/02/2017 12:26

I would like to ask some opinions , I don't really know how to start this ...
So I'm 9 weeks pregnant now and the past few weeks have been really hard on me , I'm usually the type of person who would soldier throught it and try my hardest but I have been sick up to 24 times a day , my manager isn't the most approachable person , yesterday she came up to say I could go home when it was 10 mins to the end of my shift already. So I stayed and went home on normal time.
Last night I passed out in the bathroom around 5 ish and before that , at around 3 I notified her I was too unwell and exsusthed and could not come in to work. She read it instantly . She then texted a very blunt text saying , YOU HAVE TO CALL. Wich I only saw at 8 when I got up to take my DS to school. My DH isn't at home until tomorrow he is with his mother who's ill.
And work has texted this morning to ask if I was signed off by doctors , when I said I I had been to the doctors and had stronger medication for sickness and will go back on the drip if I don't improve ..
clearly they just seem to bother about what to and what not to pay me. I have only called in sick once before and never called in sick before my pregnancy .
AIBU to think they just want me to quit ? I'm lost ... it's getting really hard to go through this with the pelvic injury I have , the severe sickness and no support from work .
Any word of advice ?

OP posts:
troodiedoo · 21/02/2017 12:32

Have you told her you are pregnant yet? (Guessing not at nine weeks). If you're ill, you're ill and you can't go in to work. Your manager will manage because that's her job. It's not a nice situation to be in, you have my sympathy. You must put yourself first now though. Document everything that is said and ensure you follow correct procedure for calling in sick. Good luck.

PotteringAlong · 21/02/2017 12:32

No, they don't just want you to quit. I assume from your post that you're meant to call in sick but you just sent a message? They can't count pregnancy related sickness against you but you have to follow proper procedures too.

2014newme · 21/02/2017 12:36

She said you could go early but you stayed, is that correct?
We don't like it when employees text they have to phone in.
You don't need their permission to leave work if you ate I'll say you ate sick and going home.
It sounds a really tough time it must be awful being that sick. They don't sound sympathetic

Blueroses99 · 21/02/2017 12:36

If you haven't already, tell them that you are pregnant so you have better protection at work.

MuvaWifey77 · 21/02/2017 12:42

I told them I am pregnant. I had to tell them because of the physio I'm doing ( which means I need to be allowed comfortable shoes and to sit down inberween patients ) so I told them.
The only reason I did not call was because , I texted around 3 and managed to sleep from 5 til 7 . Do work expect you to put an alarm on to notify them when you have been ill overnight ?
Thanks for the words , i feel very alone .. it's depressing..

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MuvaWifey77 · 21/02/2017 12:47

2015newme , she told me I could go home when it was 10 mins to the end of my shift. that comes across as an insult to me. I also needed to wait for my lift which I could have arranged for earlier had she mentioned anything earlier .

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2014newme · 21/02/2017 12:50

You need to be more assertive, "i am going home because I am sick". Practice saying that.

vfoster · 21/02/2017 12:58

My work have a policy in which we have to call on the morning of each absence so I normally set an alarm even if I know I'm going to be off. Since I've found out I'm pregnant my manager has been a bit more understanding and has settled for a text but I still offer to call in the text.
If you're too ill to go into work you can self certify for the first 5 days (I think it's 5!) but after that you may need to get a fit note from your doctor.
As PPs have said, you're an adult who can decide if you're well enough to be in work. As long as you have followed procedure you are protected by law so don't worry.
Some managers can be unreasonable and can make you feel bad but realistically they can't do anything.

Good luck!

MuvaWifey77 · 21/02/2017 13:33

Ladies , thanks so much! Thanks so much vfoster, I didn't know that. I genuinely thought I needed permition even if unwell at work. The are very strict and a little unreasonable sometimes. It's really nice to be able to get help and talk to people who will try and understand me. Thanks again

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Mammabear13 · 21/02/2017 13:43

That doesn't sound like normal sickness, it sounds like hyperemesis. It is not uncommon to be signed off work in the first trimester. Come onto this thread

The ladies are lovely and offer wise advice

oliversmummy26 · 21/02/2017 14:37

Muva have you been in touch with your GP? If you're being sick 24 times a day you shouldn't be in work IMO. However as other posters have said if your works policy is that you need to call if you're going to be off ill, then you do need to call. Presumably you have an alarm set to get you up in the mornings when you're working anyway? I understand why you text at 3am as it was the middle of the night, but I would also follow that up with a phone call at about 8am or whenever you would have been due into work.

I think it's right that you can self certify for up to 5 workign days, but after that you will need a doctor's note. Which to be honest with as ill as you're being I don't think you will have any trouble getting. If you're passing out, then you're probably dehydrated too and desperately need to see a doctor.

Sparklyuggs · 21/02/2017 14:39

Sorry to hear this. Unfortunately it is common that you have to phone or have someone phone on your behalf. With my team we had a verbal agreement they could phone me the first day per the policy and each day up to five could be text or email but that was at my discretion. Could you text your DH or a friend to call? If they know you are pg they will understand why someone is calling on your behalf.

MuvaWifey77 · 21/02/2017 15:58

I will always make sure even if feeling terribly ill that will phone in . It seems like a must , strict policy even though these are people who have known me for 10 years . And know how much I work hard and never call in sick. Maybe I just expected too much and I don't mean much... never mind.
Thanks ladies . I have been to the doctors , she was very good and very understanding , she's treating as severe sickness but I don't seem to be dehydrated so I won't be referred to hospital for iv .
Thanks xx

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SockswithSandals · 21/02/2017 16:29

Personally I would get signed off for a few weeks. They can't do a thing when it's pregnancy related and you have a sick note. You sound like you're having an awful time and you need to rest and try and relax, not worry about work. Flowers

shopaholic85 · 21/02/2017 16:40

I agree that you shouldn't be at work if you are being sick that many times a day. I was sick around 20 times a day from 7 - 14 weeks and I was signed off for the entire time. And definitely pop over to the hyperemesis support thread - everyone on there was so lovely and understanding.

HN42 · 21/02/2017 18:34

I would ask for your doctor to sign you off - I was not throwing up anywhere near as much as you but my boss sent me home after a weekend of throwing up more than usual as I was pale and gaunt and she demanded I stay away for at least 2 days. I'm sorry your boss is not being understanding as mine, but she should be more flexible with you.

MuvaWifey77 · 21/02/2017 23:38

Thanks for the advice , HG support thread are just so lovely and helpful .
HN42 yes , they aren't v understanding. They just want me to show up , shut up and do my job.
I have never been signed off in my life, do I just explain everything and ask my doctor ?


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