What happens to your body after the birth?

[Neverknowing]

Hey guys, I wanted to start a really honest thread about what it's like after giving birth. There's so many things no one tells you about pregnancy which would have been helpful to know before hand (heartburn, skin tags etc) and I'm wondering what I've not been told about what it's like after ?!

I'm a bit late to this party but I had to throw in my tuppence....

1. You will look 5 months pregnant after giving birth. For quite a while.

1. Your posture will never be the same.

1. Your skin, hair, nails and eyes will deteriorate over the following months. You will occasionally look dead. And fat.

1. You will have to shove pads into your underwear on a daily basis. Everything leaks. All the time. For ages.

1. But at least your kids will be cute.

I had my baby at 21 and was in for a big shock after the birth, whether it was genetic or something \i don't know. Most people get away with it by my previous smooth taut stomach (I was very slim in those days) was a mass of stretch marks going right down my thighs I don't know why as I wasn't exactly enormous. My boobs which were a perky D cup before stretched down like empty socks, I looked like a 90 year old. You do not want to look like this aged 21. It was so bad I got plastic surgery on the NHS to lift them twice because one op wasn't enough. I went to a specialist hospital in East Grinstead who do reconstructive surgery and they suggested I might have a form of Ehler's Danlos syndrome that affects the skin collagen. I've always been body conscious since. I got over it by becoming a naturist for a while - and saw that there is always someone worse off than yourself. I do hope that if anyone else has this problem that they see their GP as the NHS will help in extreme cases. I didn't have any more children, I was afraid of what would happen.

Things I would really like to have known about:
-going really, really cold and shivering violently and uncontrollably and apparently looking quite grey, for a minute or two very soon after birth (not sure this happens to everyone but it did to me every time)
-the lochia. It's not like a heavy period, unless you imagine getting a full 5 days flow in, ooh, about half an hour. And the smell is not nice
-the belly still being there for quote some fucking time. And in the immediate post birth period being all weird and empty and floppy
-afterpains. The name gives it away but I did not know they were going to be quite so painful

I had a section.
If they don't give you lactulose recc getting some.
Breastfeeding for me was v painful for first few weeks but then we were away and glad I gritted my teeth. If your nipples crack or bleed get shields and quickly ! Boots deliver quick if you can't get out. They saved me.

Your body is never the same again. I am struggling to get the 1.5 stone that I put on in last month back off. I didn't gain at all, I did so well!! Then became a beast in that last few weeks although tbh I put on more weight AFTER baby came. I craved chocolate - I never craved anything during pregnancy and tbh hardly ate. But in the first month pp I ate cake after cake after cake. I'm now 7 months pp and really finding it hard to get it off.

I have a bad stretch mark that is refusing to die down as well as the others have. My spine clicks in the most peculiar fashion.

I was never particularly body conscious but all that goes out the window in the hospital !

After surgery they put baby on me and took me to recovery. They helped me get him latched on then left us a while. He then stayed there for over an hour and a half. I was too monged out to think to change him over so I was really sore.

In the few weeks after we were home what I know remember most is how much my arms hurt from pushing myself up all the time. Next time I would like to try to work out and build them up a bit beforehand. Although I will probably just eat cake instead.

Oh and get a note pad as your memory will be shot to shit now until you get good sleep again so you will need to write everything down!

Oh yes and hope it's not just me but the leaks went on for months after. I didn't do enough pelvic floor exercise clearly. And I often have to pee in the night which I didn't before.

You cant tell that you need a wee until your bladder is fit for bursting, then you suprise yourself with how long it takes to finish having said wee!
You may well need more pairs of pyjama bottoms and knickers in your hospital bag than you would expect.

As many have said before me. The piles. Omg never known anything like it. I had to have surgery 4 days after giving birth as They were horrendous. Definitely take lactalose. You maybe lucky and not get them

None of the Above.
I didn't have CSections, though.
Ah, I tell small lies, pelvic floor is probably worse for wear. & I did get afterpains, but only 4 a few days with babies 3+4. Strong painkillers sorted.

For me:

Negatives (straight after): heavy bleeding for several weeks, shockingly strong after pains (just like contractions) for days after, empty jelly belly which felt as if it had no muscle strength whatsoever (complete opposite to my usual tough, strong body), struggling to walk length of high street a week after birth, gianormous rock solid boulder boobs that uncontrollably squirted out breastmilk from one side of the room to the other, horrendous piles and a hugely swollen and scarily distorted vulva/labia, passing a huge blood clot the size of my palm which looked the same as a piece of liver 3/4 days after birth.

Positives:

No stitches or tears, home from hospital 6hrs after birth, no time spent on the postnatal ward, breastfeeding was not painful (apart from just before a feed or if baby slept too long), back to my pre-pregnancy weight within 10 days (lost 3st over course of mat leave), looked in best shape ever within 2mths of giving birth. No lasting negative effects. Pelvic floor just as tight/strong/effective, no stretch marks on stomach (only boobs and thighs)

Non-healing c section scar - too dark and damp there.

Mad crazy itchy leg that I took the skin off by scratching too hard in my sleep.
Baby blues on day 2 - remember looking out of the hospital window and wanting to jump out of it.
The wobbly belly that seemed to escape during clumsy breastfeeding.
The bleeding and indignity of being cleaned up down below while bedridden.
Fallen arches from quick weight gain that were very painful and took many months to recover.
Had three kids so it all gets forgotten after a year or so.....

My hair, skin and nails are now infinitely better

A nice c section scar smiling back at me every morning

Belly was very wobbly and wrinkly initially but that seems to be getting better day by day

Hips more rounded... But I quite like that.

My knees and joints hurt a lot initially but this wore off after 7 weeks or so

Overall, if you don't binge eat in pregnancy and do regular exercise including pilates for core strengthening you can pretty much get your body back soon after

My arms are also getting a lot stronger from holding the baby

I'm 12 weeks pp...

• belly still a little ( a lot) squishy and for some reason keep getting a really dirty belly button

• enjoying thrush 'down there' and possibly in nipples too

• breast feeding still hurts (although see above)

• I actually quite enjoyed first pp pop 😌

• My heart and mind have become completely consumed by a very small person 😍

My fourth baby was an undiagnosed vaginal breech. I was so conscious that I didn't want him dangling with his head inside my uterus any longer than necessary, I hossed him out at such a force, that the ensuing piles affected the way I pooed for 5 months after the birth.

Another one here who went into shock after and took ages to stop shaking. I was OK when first cuddling my DD in the pool, but once we got out and her dad took her the shakes were uncontrollable.

Despite having a 'textbook labour' of 4 hours in water, I felt utterly traumatised. Wouldn't let the MW examine me so no stitching at all (no idea if I needed), terrified of sex or anything going near that area for months. Had to take a valium for my smear test 3 months later - they had never bothered me pre birth.

Eventually got my head round it all but I was quite shocked at how I reacted mentally. She was my second, but the first was a long time previous and with a shit load of drugs. The pain I went through during labour second time roumd was incredible and I can't quite believe I am doing it again.....

miaowthecat I had terrible spd and was still suffering a year on.

In desperation I tried an osteopath- I was very skeptical (I don't do alternate medicine) but she was totally non-woo and it was just like very firm physio. Hurt like a bitch but after two sessions I am dramatically improved.

If you can find an osteopath who specialises in pregnant/postnatal stuff then there can be hope- honestly I was a total mess. It's not 100% gone, I'd say 85% fixed, but I can now walk/climb stairs without being in real pain.

A bit like a deflated balloon. I had my three naturally and the first visit to the bathroom is always interesting - looks like a scene from a horror movie with all that blood. Doing the first wee and poo feels like a massive achievement and you feel very tender down there for days afterwards. Third time round I had some lower back pain too. Afterpains, which get worse with each baby are an unpleasant surprise which nobody tells you about. But plenty of painkillers helps there. Latching on hurt like hell for the first ten days or so of breastfeeding each time. After that I was fine. Lansinoh is your friend in this respect. On the plus side I had no stretch marks and it all goes by so quickly, those early days are over before you know it!

For me - straight after giving birth I looked about 3-4 months pregnant and was wearing normal clothes. Within a week I was pre pregnancy size though not toned.
No afterpains. Labour hurt a lot but the midwives kept coming round he ward after asking what pain relief you were on / needed and I didn't understand why they were offering, I actually felt nothing painful.
Bleeding - lasted 7 and a half weeks. Pretty disgusting for the first 2-3 weeks with clots.
One of the hardest things was trying to hold a new baby constantly who cried when you put him down whilst also trying to keep a scar clean and pads regularly changed. I felt pretty disgusting for a while.
Hair started falling out at 3 months. Skin now is pretty bad (3-4 months).
Oh and my back really hurt after giving birth for about a month. Like really hurt.

I had read about having incontinence afterwards but I didn't know it could go the other way and I couldn't unclench my muscles to do a wee - the midwife told me to run a warm bath so I could wee in the bath!
Second time I couldn't sit on the toilet seat, I totally got the point of foreign squat toilets then.

the pain of my milk coming in was worse than labour.

Had DC3 10 days ago. Yes to the uncontrollable shaking, wobbly belly, bleeding, painful breastfeeding and general pallor of death. But honestly, after producing three children, I'm in awe of my body!

A good thread as I was totally prepared for the birth but was not expecting the aftermath! For me, soreness from my vagibal birth lasted a good 5-6 weeks. Was constantly taking painkillers. My stomach is a completely different shape and I'm struggling to find comfy clothes months later. Also my boobs are the same size bra-wise but totally flaccid and saggy! My side profile is not good right now. I'm sure I could get back in shape if I wanted to but I'm not that bothered!

I had an episiotomy and a big tear with a lot of stitches but I don't remember having any pain and they healed really quickly.

Yes to the leaky boobs and night sweats. The night sweats were terrible!

Also, I don't think anyone's mentioned this yet, but after birth everything is a bit 'rearranged' down there. Even if it springs back to the same size, bits will have moved slightly. Whenever I wiped after going to the loo I'd sort of miss the mark. And it took about 18 months to lose the muscle memory of where things used to be and relearn where they are now.

I'm only talking a couple of centimetres, but it still felt strange!

I hope first time pregnant women won't be totally terrified by this thread!

Yes, you're likely to experience some of these things but you'd be extremely unlikely to get all of them at once. I just want to say to any pregnant ladies reading this - don't worry, you won't be incontinent, have piles and mastitis, infected episiotomy, c-section scarred, internally damaged from forceps, catheter for weeks, fat, thin, massive boobs, deflated boobs, etc all at the same time!

You might have a couple of the above but it won't seem as significant and awful as it sounds because you'll likely be all loved up with your beautiful newborn, and even if you're not, time will heal.

I'd forgotten about the after pains once you have baby 2 and beyond. Terrible pain in your uterus when you breast feed for I think s couple of weeks. What the fuck is that all about?

The weird wobbly tummy, it's just strange

The first poo, terrifying. I was so scared but it's really not that bad!

Bleeding and passing clots for weeks

Weeing is v painful, get a water bottle to squirt on your bits or lean riiiiiight forward so that it is aimed away from you

I didn't breastfeed and waiting for my milk to dry up was horrible, it looked like I'd had a boob job. A big painful rock hard boob job.

I've strangely lost some of my sense of smell since having DS, it's very weird indeed.

But honestly I would do it all again in a heartbeat, if it was that bad, everyone would only have 1 child