advice to cope with early pregnancy with my 4 year old special needs son

[kay2684]

I have a four year old son who as a autism diagnosis and severe attention and hyperactivity which is eventually expected by professionals to be diagnosed as having ADHD too when he is older so the result is I have a very hyperactive and aggressive little boy who can be so loving but also violent and one of his repetitive obsessional behaviour is to 'bash' as he says me in the stomach and legs quite hard he kicks head buts punches and has caused injuries to myself and the rest of my family as I am very early into the pregnancy and have had previous miscarriages I am reluctant to say anything before 12 weeks but am struggling to explain it to him and also worried about when it gets to the time the best way to explain things to him and help him understand as although he has siblings this is the first pregnancy he will be aware of as he his 2 older sisters and one younger who was born when he was 1 and I am concerned as how to get him to understand and any tips on how to help him understand

Can you swap the 'bashing' for something else? A special cushion to bash his head into with you holding his hand? Or a pain of boxing gloves and hand pads for you? He puts on the gloves and hits your padded targets. I taught a boy whose 'thing' was to kiss and cuddle, he became violent and distraught if he was told no. I 'swapped' cuddles for a high 5. It took a little adjustment but the sound of the high 5 gave the same sound as the smack of a kiss which was soothing to him. We had to hi5 8 or 9 times in a specific order, but it meant that he was able to stay in mainstream school. Both my brothers have Aspergers so I've got a bit of personal experience with ASD.