Would you go again???

[Nessie100]

I've recently had my 2nd child, but am in 2 minds as to whether to try for a third.

I have 2 healthy children. If I were to give my body time to recover before trying again, I would be realistically be 40ish before I would be giving birth a third time.

I know from the previous 2 that I would have a very difficult pregnancy (physically) but that does not concern me as much as the idea I would be playing russian roulette for a third healthy child.

Would you do it?

No, I wouldn't do it. I am in pretty much the same situation as you OP. Though I was fortunate not to have physically difficult pregnancies but a previous condition means I have to be fairly closely monitored under different teams = lots of appointments. I would not want an age gap smaller than 2.5 years, so like you would be 39-40 trying for a third.

I am clear that I am happy with 2 for a number of reasons (physical, financial, practical and some selfish ones) but everyone's priorities are different and your desire for another baby might trump any potential difficulties.

Is the only reason you think your child may not be healthy your age? If so, I don't think it's as clear cut as that. My mum had me at 40 and two of my sisters have recently had children at the age of 42 and 40 and everyone was fine.

My third pregnancy has been my easiest by far - I'm 39 soon. If you want to have three, it's your choice. I haven't ruled out a fourth.

I'm over the moon I have 2 wonderful children, some days I just feel 2 isnt enough.

Other days I realise just how hard it is even having 2, never mind adding more to the mix.

Just to give u something to think about I'm 34 I had my first child at 30. At this point I was classed as an older mother. I'm slightly over weight and suffered with spd. 12 months later I gave birth to my second and 18 months after that I had a third. I'm now 34 with a 4,3 and 18 month old. Iv always wanted 4 children and always wanted them close. When my son (3rd lo) was born he had congenital birth defects and diagnosed with a rare condition. I sobbed my heart out as I told my OH that we had "pushed our luck". For a long time I felt guilty but he is amazing and amazes us every day. Once he turned 9 months I realised that I might want my fourth child. Practically it's probably not a good idea but deep down emotionally I just knew that I needed another. Iv swung from maybe next month to no way definitely not. This has been going on for 9 months as he is now 18 months old. I kind of decided that it's too big of a gap now and maybe I am done then low and behold af hasn't arrived this month. All I'm saying is age is just a number and whatever life throws at u u just deal with it. There's a chance that any children we have could have similar defects which is another reason iv stalled but here we are. Call me irresponsible but I believe that we are only given what we can deal with. My children are my everything. X