First time mum at 31

[Dueindecember2016]

Hi all,

Recently found out I'm pregnant and it's all sooo exciting! I have a predicted due date of 25 December, but that dates aren't exact. I already have my appointment with the midwife booked in and she's coming to visit me in 3 weeks time at home. Does anyone have any information on what to expect?

I also have a hectic couple of months coming up one which includes a girls holiday abroad. There's a large group of us going and it's going to be difficult to hide the fact I'm not drinking. I thought about saying antibiotics, but they wouldn't believe that. Again, any tips from people in this situation will be helpful.

Any useful tips about the first trimester would be amazing! :)

Just tell them you're pregnant. Far easier.

And be prepared that there's a chance you may be sick as a dog all day so it enjoy such a trip at all. Congratulations. The first 14wks are crappy. You often feel awful and don't always want to say why. Prepare yourself for extreme tiredness whether sick or not. Early pregnancy is crap IMO but it does get better.

not enjoy

If good friends just say you are not drinking for medical reasons and don't want to discuss it any further as it is early days. They will all guess and but be too polite to talk about it.

Hello! I'm nearly 9 weeks with my first (and will almost be 31 when the baby is born!). I went on a girls' weekend away recently and used the antibiotic excuse. My friends definitely didn't believe me but they were all too polite to say anything so I got away with it!

I didn't feel comfortable telling them at that point (haven't even told the parents yet!) so if you want to keep it to yourself, you definitely should. Don't feel pressured into saying anything if you're not ready. Say you're on antibiotics, or make your own drinks (without the alcohol). You could even say you're currently trying for a baby and staying away from booze for the time being.

Hope that helps - congratulations! :)

Thanks everyone! I like the idea of saying that we're trying but the girls will suss me out.

Copper grey: when is your due date or approximate? I have a home appointment in May then scan will be a few weeks after

I agree - just tell them. Far easier than trying to hide it. And you may not be able to hide the constant puking

Just tell them. Sorry to say it coppergrey but you effectively told them you're pregnant by using the antibiotics excuse. They may not have said anything to you but I guarantee there would have been whispers. It is without doubt the worst excuse to use because there are only a very small number of antibiotics that you can't actually drink on and they aren't the most common ones.

The only other thing is to pretend to drink. Order lime and lemonade or s9da water and pretend it's got vodka in. Most people don't even notice although may be harder to get away with on a holiday.
Congrats by the way.

Congratulations!
Agree with previous posters- tell your friends. Thought I'd done a good job of covering my tracks- being designated driver, ordering a tonic but making it look like G&T, loose tops to cover bloating etc- but at least half of them had guessed by the time I told them. One of my customers even rumbled me the moment I walked into her office and I was only 9 weeks! If people know why you're not your usual self it's much less stressful than pretending you're alright when you're not and you actually want to crawl under your duvet and not emerge until the end of the first trimester...

First appointment with midwife is to go through your medical history, briefly discuss where you might want to have baby, useful phone numbers, what to expect from future appointments and to arrange your dating scan. Some places may also do your bloods there and then, but I had mine done at second appointment.

Tips for first trimester- do not underestimate how tired you may feel so sleep whenever you can. Dependent on how far along you are when you go on holiday you may not feel up to doing loads of activities, if people know why you don't want to do xyz then that will hopefully avoid any drama.

If you feel nauseous, just eat whatever you can, as long as you have some food in your tummy and take your folic acid and multivitamin religiously, baby should be just fine x

If you're not already, start taking folic acid and vitamin D. If you're already taking pregnacare or similar then this is covered, they're both in that.

Fingers crossed you are one of the lucky ones and won't feel too ill in the first trimester, but be prepared...it may be a bit grim!

I think the only way to throw people off the scent when you're not drinking is to just order alcohol anyway and pretend to drink it for as long as you can, then leave it somewhere. Or confide in one person you trust and get them to take sips when nobody's looking. The antibiotics excuse never works.

Congratulations!