The Berry-Copter!!! (Early 2015 edition)

[FeatherFeather11]

Here we go! Here's to a big Berrie clusterdiff from the other thread and many a safe and healthy baby Berrie arrival in 2015!

Bair my FC weren't bothered either since it wasn't IVF but I had an early scan privately, I think I paid 90 pounds and since then I've seen them elsewhere for about 50 I think. It was worth it for me for the peace of mind and a lot cheaper than another IVF cycle! I couldn't justify the 499 for Harmony though.

Lady lots of people seem to be having harmony on the 'due in July' thread. I don't know how they can justify it. It's a lot of money for nothing that you don't get on the NHS

I think Harmony might be worth it if you are high risk for Downs. As it's less risk to the foetus than an amniocentesis.

Otherwise I wouldn't bother myself, but I know some people like the early reassurance.

Bair you can get a private scan prior to your 12w dating one, you know? I think early 'reassurance' scans are about £50 where we are, through BabyBond. I didn't have one myself as heavy bleeding in week 6 meant I got an NHS EPU scan - don't recommend that as a scan-obtaining method though

Thanks for kinds words on BP, everyone. I was in bits a bit on Sat night as I have a real, real fear of gynae procedures and was feeling so much more relaxed about the birth at home. Plus our hospital locally is not the best (sky high intervention rates, not enough staff etc). But what will be, will be, and as long as the baby doesn't get injured during the birth, that's fine.

I am mostly worried about the baby getting hurt (this happened to someone I know due to ill-advised forceps delivery) and also getting PND if I react badly a highly medicalised birth (as I tend to get weird anxious thoughts and dreams and upsets over gynae stuff so kind of worried it will be even worse with something as dramatic as birth). I would just so hate for my baby's first weeks of life to be this mental black hole for me because of some psychological reaction - this will be my only baby, and it's taken so long to get here, and I really just want to enjoy and feel good during her first weeks. It's time I'll never get back :(

But then, hey, who knows. BP was 140/98 on Sat, which is mild hypertension, and then 119/83 today (83 not great but within normal range) so we will see tomorrow. Trying to stay caaaaalmmmmmm!

Pip there was a point while waiting for the down's risk blood tests to come back on the NHS that I wished I'd gone with harmony for the earlier result, but this was just me being stressed, I already knew the nuchal thickness from the scan and that was OK. Thankfully, I'm low risk and I've saved £499 to put towards baby stuff/antenatal classes/mat leave. I'd never even heard of the Harmony test before reading about it on MN!

RP that's good news about your BP. BP=stroke volume X heart rate X total peripheral resistance. So you probably already know this but you could use your hypnobirthing techniques to help decrease your heart rate and make sure the room is warm to dilate your blood vessels.

Just popping in to say happy new year Berries.

Nolly I'm so very, very sorry this has happened to you, please take care of yourself

It sounds like everyone had enjoyable holidays. I'm back to work today and it feels like I was never off. Not much to report here otherwise, just waiting for my scan next Monday. Feeling incredibly nervous about it all and it's causing me to not sleep very well. I wish I had a stronger symptom or two.

First day back at work is definitely the longest day of the year Otter

Bair, I used same early scan technique as RP, not recommended for sanity, mum was telling me how when she was pregnant they just didn't do scans, at all, imagine! Not knowing what or when or anything! Bonkers

OH and I were talking about this one being an only child, he's suggested adopting a sibling. Sheesh, if he'd been open to adopting in the first place I might not have spent all that time in the clinic and stabbing myself in the belly with hormones...

I had the harmony done and was really glad I did. It was £400 (for the package) well spent when the nhs couldn't give us answers and I would do it again at the drop of a hat. I didn't want to have the cvs unless I needed to. The thorough scans were enough to set my mind at ease after a really crappy nhs scan. Having tried for a baby for +three years, doing clomid for nearly a year which ended in an ectopic pregnancy, which left me in a severe state of anxiety, and falling into the 'high risk for downs' category the harmony stopped me from going completely mental. Different for everyone though.

rp I can understand why you are feeling the way you do, but just remember that bp tends to fluctuate vastly. lady's suggestion of practicing your hypno-birthing in the lead up to tomorrow is a good one. Just trust in yourself that the right thing will happen and your gorgeous baby will be with you soon. Totally get your fears but maybe try not to project them too much so they don't become a reality (in your head, at least), you know? Sending you blood pressure lowering vibes as I type!

otters happy new year! Know the scan dread feeling. Here for a hand hold if you need it.

First day on mat leave/hols. Feel a little blue today for no reason in particular. Boo.

It seems a lot of money to me and there isn't anyone near that does it.
I don't think DH would go for it tbh.

I think the Harmony is a great package and I can see why it's so popular. It's £39 for a dating scan privately here. We've talked and decided not to. Every day is a win and a blessing, I've full on symptoms and have no history of problems in pregnancy. It's purely the 3 year 4 months slog it took to get here playing with my head, and I know my own mind, I'll have one scan, relax a bit, then worry more and end up getting 1 a month.

Glad things were in the normal range today RP. I'm interested in hypno-birthing, I swing between wanting that and a big juicy epidural. Does it help with anxiety during pregnancy?

I do hope you enjoy your mat leave Feather. I'm sure you'll settle into it soon. Have you anything specific planned or are you just going to go with the flow?

I spoke to my Mum today Lentil, she's all shocked (we never told her we were trying and she assumed it was a case of not wanting another rather than unable) and shared her gory birth story with me (again). So glad I'm not birthing in the 80's. Re: Your LO being an only. DS has been an only child for 11 years now. He's thrilled to have a sibling on the way, but I don't think he missed out on anything his peers with brothers and sisters did. People tend to see 'only' children in a weird way. He's happy, vibrant and confident. Whether you have 1 child or 7 they're there own little selves and siblings or none doesn't change that imho.

I've lost track. Anyone fancy a list?

I talked the idea of the Harmony test over with DH and he's not keen as it won't change anything.

I'd never heard of harmony until I came on mn. I can see for some cases it could be very useful & reassuring. I've got nuchal & bloods at my 12 week so will go from there.

You're so right bair re people having funny ideas about only children. If this works out for us I can imagine us just having one and although it might not be what I imagined I'd be happy & I think an only child can be too. Lots of our friends have had siblings so they can ' play with each other', in my experience, this adds up to argue and fight with each other!!

lentil some of the older women I work with said there were no scans in their day. Must have been v difficult not knowing what was going on, I think lots of mmcs must have got detected quite late pre no 12 wk scan.

feather sorry you feel a bit down, is finishing work a bit of an anti climax?

rp some great advice re your bp, hope it comes down & you feel calmer soon x x

I'm an only and hated it. DH is one of four and hated it.
What I found hard about being an only is that (as an adult I have realised) my parents have a dysfunctional relationship that I was stuck in the middle of. DH had realised that his siblings were all gits.

When I was growing up being an only was uncommon and only children were treated as an oddity. I remember struggling in French lessons when we were learning to talk about our families as no one knew how to say 'only child' in French.

Nolly good to hear from you. Hope you're coping. If you're anything like me it's hard not to let your imagination run away with you thinking about life with a little one...no matter how cautious and realistic we are. So I imagine it's really difficult for you and mr n. Hope you're able to support each other.

I've not heard about harmony until now. I think I'll see how standard tests go and what our risk is before making any decisions...or does it take a while to get booked in?

Feather are you feeling any better? hope you relax and start enjoying nest building. Perhaps hormones being all over the place?

RP flag bp looking better and fx for relaxing day tomorrow and good bp result again.

Bair very impressed you've held off from early scan. I don't think I could stand it! Already can't wait til 12 wk scan and only had early scan last week!

Otter I know how you feel! Every day drags! Don't worry too much about symptoms...I didn't have great deal either but everything was fine with mini pix so hopefully you'll be the same. Hope you're able to distract yourself in the meantime. I'm also having trouble sleeping. Exhausted in day then twitchy and itchy at night. Woke up with stomach pain 3:30 last night needing food. So annoying. Need sleep not night time biscuits.

Hope those of you who were also on 1st day back till work survived ok. My day was long and boring...not great start to the year!

Ah, je suis une fille unique Pip! Siblings are gits, but they're also family. For me, producing just one child will have been a massive battle and I will be 40 this year, so, that's it, mentally, physically, emotionally, financially, I can't contemplate more, even if it were an option, little lentil will have to be ok with not having someone on hand to beat up

Re the scans, I guess if it wasn't an option, it wasn't missed, I can't imagine it

Hope your blue feeling passes soon Feather

First day back at work today, I've been in PJs or jeggings for the last two weeks, all my work clothes have shrunk, they definitely no longer fit me, I was anticipating they'd be a bit snug, but they're really uncomfortable

Hi feather I know what you mean about feeling blue. Being in the house by yourself especially can make you feel a bit down. Maybe try getting out and going for a swim or a walk or to a museum or similar? Just something that isn't all pregnancy-pregnancy-pregnancy, something for you. It will pass but you need to take care of your mental wellbeing now :)

bushy DMIL had a third-tri scan in 1978 when pg with DH and they told her they couldn't find a head Can you imagine??? Needless to say he was born with one

Anyhow my BP was okay today - not super but okay - 119/88. They are happy to keep me on the home birth track for now but a different MW will review in a fortnight to make sure it's the right decision. So now I need to keep my BP low! Going to watch out for salt (I always assume this is okay as we don't have ready meals and takeaways and don't add salt to food), exercise every day (have been lazy recently) and do hypno CD every night.

lady thanks for your tips - yes, I did the hypno CD last thing before sleep last night and also this morning before MW arrived! I didn't know about the room temp until you mentioned it so I stuck the fire on for half an hour before she came. Also sat with feet up for that time, and made sure my legs were uncrossed, I hadn't eaten breakfast, and didn't need a wee. Leaving nothing to chance!!

bair I find hypnobirthing really helpful for pg anxiety. Obviously I can't say yet if it does anything for birth but I have big anxieties around trusting HCP and anybody examining me and it has helped immensely with those feelings. I am using the Maggie Howells CD off Amazon but I can see it wouldn't work for everyone. Maybe worth trying it early on to see how it makes you feel?

I'm feeling super poorly at work today. Don't know what to do with myself. I've not been physically sick at all yet, just nauseous. Does it relieve it of I go and make myself vom? Sorry tmi. Hope no ones having lunch.

Ahh, glad all is on the right track rp - am sure you will get your lovely home birth!

Thanks for all the support, berries. Guess the sudden shock of not going back to work and being at home got to me a little. I have quite a full-on job and I guess it's tied in to my identity a little so letting that go for some time has been full on to get my head around. I'll be fine! Taking your advice rp to do nice, non-pregnancy related things today. Also have a friend coming to stay for a couple of nights too. Then gotta get on the baby prep! Not packed hospital bag yet or put together the crib, washed baby clothes etc....speaking of which, dumb question, but those of you that have had your baby or win and rp - are you using special washing powder for pre-washing baby's clothes or just the normal stuff? Prof Google is confusing me...

Oh, pixie, poor you. I never threw up - just had the nausea. Was too scared to force myself to vom, but only because I'm a big baby and usually cry when I vomit so avoided that...! Have you tried eating something? I found satsumas helped, but different for everybody...

I think I'll give it a go RP, great news on the BP too, keep up the relaxing work!

Pixie, I had HG with DS and it looks like I'm going the same way. I wasn't sick until around 3pm yesterday and I felt awful, like motion sickness and a hangover all day.

Today I woke up vomiting. I feel better after I vomit but for around 20 minutes before it starts again. I'm following the NHS advice of having loads of naps (not back at college until tomorrow), DH is doing everything and I'm watching boxsets to take my mind off it. If you do vomit keep an eye out for your lips gong dry and super strong wee (signs of dehydration).

DH is being amazing, he's taken over everything house wise and is being so understanding at just how rubbish I feel.

I have a hypnobirthing course soon and it came with this book which I've found really helpful: www.amazon.co.uk/Mindful-Hypnobirthing-mindfulness-techniques-confident-ebook/dp/B00GIV5FJG/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&qid=1420546022&sr=8-2&keywords=mindful+mamma

bair and pixie I was veeerrry ill for 16-17 weeks (sorry....) and I found going for a walk in the fresh air helped a bit and sometimes being ill did too. But I never had to force myself, it just happened (ick!). I also found that listening closely to my body's cravings and aversions was key. Like, I wanted particular cereal and no other kind; I did NOT want tap water which I normally drink but I did want sparkling water; etc. Just tune in to what your body feels like and it will pass. Eventually.

feather I have been feeling super frumpy recently as haven't dyed my hair in ages and am currently wearing DH nasty old mac as none of my coats fits anymore. So today I booked myself in for a hair and eyebrow appt this weekend. Just getting out is lovely! I am still at work despite being on MN every 2 seconds and I really know what you mean about your identity and the job. Luckily I am starting to feel more divorced from it which is right on cue.

Oh and I started a thread in Chat about washing baby clothes t'other week and the consensus was, regular non-bio is fine. We always use Persil non-bio so continuing with that. I have mostly packed hosp bags for me and dino. I have been putting everything for the baby in separate food bags to keep stuff easy to find and splashproof (i.e. clear freezer bag of baby vests, one of nappies, one with hat and scratch mitts in, etc). Still need to finish my own bag as there will be some stuff I use every day like my pj top or my lip balm which I will have to pack on the day.

Will you take music in with you? We are buying a cheap CD player as don't want to take laptop in to hosp (assuming we might have to transfer). We should trade bag lists :)

You sound a lot more organised than me, rp! Once my friend leaves I'll get on with washing and packing baby clothes and start the packing! Taking iPod and little speaker pods to the birth centre I think. OH has all the hypno-birthing mp3's on the iPod now and he's taken to listening to them before bed too...! Let's definitely swap lists! I don't have one yet, but will get on it.

Glad I'm not the only one feeling weird about finishing work, although I have to say that today is better...have booked myself in for a manicure and pedicure on Friday. Been avoiding the hair dye too, but may have to go as as you say, I am feeling a bit frumpy right now. When do you finish work?

Just found this blog/ website called Doctor and Daughter which has hospital bag lists but also quite a lot of useful info. Put together by a consultant obstetrician and his daughter - nice idea!