Book on how to actually look after my baby?

[martie1]

Seems like a totally stupid question, especially since I am 36 weeks pg and should have thought of this before now, but can anyone recommend a good read, book, website or otherwise on day to day care of a child? It's only just occurred to me that Im not that confident.

Im not really talking about routines more about how to wash them, what temperature to use, how often to change nappies, when to know when to use nappy cream, burping, so many more things that probably have not occurred to me.

Im not unfamiliar with babies having nieces and nephew myself but its obviously a totally different story with my own baby and I don't really think ive been that hands on an aunty. Ive been good for a rare nappy change, bringing up wind but have definitely been one of those people who got nervous and handed baby back to mum or dad when baby started getting crotchety/crying.

Obviously wishing I had paid way more attention now and tried to be a better aunty!

I got given the Dummies Guide to Your Baby's First Year when I was expecting. It was much needed (no baby experience) and I found it pretty useful.

I really liked Your Baby Week by Week

The Haynes Baby Manual

We had new babycare by Miriam Stoppard. Lots of practical tips on bathing, nappy changing etc.

I had no baby experience either, and was daunted by nappies, burps, baths etc. DH and I worked it out in a couple of weeks. It's a lot easier than people let on. MN massive help too!

The Baby Book by Dr Sears

I realised I had no clue as soon as I got back from hospital and panic bought a few books. Best for what should baby be doing this month- type advice is 'what to expect-babies' although it is sometimes a bit bonkers, but for general morale boosting and supportive comments would recommend the MN babies book. You'll spend hours online otherwise, the book has lots of real life advice and generally made me feel better about everything!

Do you still get the birth to five book free. I found the books made me panic and as my mum pointed out the baby doesn't read the book

Currently working my way through First Time Parent by Lucy Atkins. Sensible, practical and making me feel I might be able to cope. Haven't given birth yet, but would recommend.

When I read Penelope Leach I felt better about what I was doing snd motherhood generally, it's a very kind and sensible book.

Agree it's not as difficult as people make out, its 90% instinct. Just do whatever makes them happy which I found was being held. If they smell fresh and they're feeding, weeing and pooing then their physical needs are being met.

If it cries, feed it. Still crying? Change it. Then burp, jig, sing... still no luck, go outside. Repeat the process. If none of the above works, phone a friend.

What ch1134 said, but I'd check Google or MN rather than phone a friend. Got to maintain that veneer of coping somehow

Honestly, your midwives and health visitor will tell you everything you need to know. DH and I didn't know at all what we were doing, we have no friends around with babies and virtually no family support. Our two are still alive astonishingly

Thanks for your funny and sensible advice ladies. I might make a wee trip to waterstones just to consider which is best from quick read and will definitely be using MN, which has been my saving grace pre and during pg!

Or for free, here's the NHS birth to five book:

www.resourcesorg.co.uk/assets/pdfs/BirthToFive09.pdf

Just ignore the line in it, 'Most babies should be sleeping through the night by six months old.' My copy got thrown in the bin when DS1 was still up 6+ times a night at over 12 months

The mumsnet book guide to babies is also quite good. Covers the basics and lots of things to try.

It is mostly instinct IMO

You will hear/ smell when they poo.
You don't need to bath a newborn for a couple of weeks. Don't use bubble bath when you do.
Nappies go bulgy when they have wee in them, easy to tell if they need it changed for wee.

Keep em cozy and lots of cuddles.

Look up the fourth trimester, it's really interesting- about how human babies are born about 3 months early for their brain development. Which is why they are so unusually helpless at birth. And how they need cuddling and human contact lots and lots.

If they get screamy try walking up and down holding baby to blink 182 songs, it bizarrely works for quite a lot of babies.

If you are planning on/ able to breastfeed basically always try this.

The theme really is cuddling, newborns sleep LOTS. And in a few weeks when you feel a bit more confident they will be awake more and you can start chatting to them and playing with bright coloured things.

Oh yes, don't believe what anyone tells you about their baby's sleep. Everyone lies

This is a good website about sleep, it's all research based and very sensible.
[https://www.isisonline.org.uk]

Pampers nappies have a yellow strip which turns blue when the baby pees!

Don't automatically assume it's hungry when it starts crying - might just want cuddling/have wind/even be bored. Stay calm during the crying; babies do cry and it's nothing wrong with what you're doing! They will sense if you're getting stressed which will make the crying worse.

If you're bottle feeding try and keep it upright for as much as possible during/after.

My son absolutely loves music/ being sung to etc. Also loves an entire host of other silly noises, especially raspberries.

Also: if you don't already have one, get a birth ball. Good for late pregnancy and soothing a crying baby!

In the first few weeks, everytime DD cried I just gave her boob. Normally straight after or during I would hear lots of noise in the nappy region which meant DD was promptly handed over to DH for her nappy change. She didn't do much in the newborn stage apart from eat, sleep and poop. We gave her a wipe down with warm water and cotton wool every night for the first week or so then braved her first bath. We had one with the support from Mamas and papas which was handy as she was so tiny and slippery in water.
It is pretty much intuitive and the rest you pick up from hanging around MN or other websites. I didn't have time to read any parenting books which was just as well since DD couldn't read either

Another vote for the Lucy Atkins "First Time Parent" book. I give it as a gift to all new parent friends. It's the only one I read, and it was very reassuring. It features gems such as not telling you not to warm a bottle up in the microwave because everybody does it, and telling you how to do it safely, and about how as far as your baby is concerned there's only one way of doing things, and that's your way.