Do I need a pram? Advice please!

[DontBeBlueBeARainbow]

I am living abroad long-term, but planning an extended stay back in the UK to give birth in a comfortable and safe environment. This means I'll actually have a baby in the UK for 2-3 months before going away again.

I will be staying with my mum and anything that I buy/acquire will either be coming back here with me, passed on or returned to the owner, so I'm hoping to be quite strict with myself and only get what I need (thanks to many previous posts I've put together a good list).

Do I need a pram?

I will have a car seat for any car journeys, but was planning to use a stretchy sling for any walks out. I will have a Moses basket for sleeping and putting down in the day, but would I be missing a trick if I didn't have a pram? In any case, it will only be used from newborn to 3 months - so if I need one, what type do I need??

Any advice much appreciated .

We were in the middle of a big move when DS was born, from Boston to Houston when he was 6 weeks old and then a permanent move back to the UK when he was 10 weeks old. So like you we could only buy what we absolutely needed. We just used slings and other carriers until DS was 8 or 9 weeks and picked up a pushchair just before we moved back to the UK. So I'd say no, you don't need one to start with, use slings and see how you go. You can always get one when you're DC is a couple of months old if you think you need something.

One thing I would consider is the terrain that you'll be pushing your pram around on when you return to the country you live in. After much research we purchased an UppaBaby Cruz in the states but, while I can see that it would be just perfect in the states, it's wheels just couldn't take all the cobbles and muddy pathways in Cambridge. UpperBaby were great about replacing the wheels, and I still think it's a great piece of equipment, but most people here seem to have a Phil & Teds, or something else with inflatable tires, and now I can see why.

Hope all goes well for the birth! Out of interest, where are you living?

Oh, just realised that I think that you're suggesting that you won't be taking a pram/pushchair back with you - is that right? I which case I really wouldn't bother, unless someone loans you one.

You don't need one.

DS is almost 12 weeks and he's never been in his pram. I've just used my sling.

I'm going to keep using the sling until he's big enough for the pushchair.

yes you definitely need something! they vary hugely in budget, tricks so depends whether you could bring it back with you.

personally I would get something like a bugaboo bee second hand and bring it back with you.

Nope. DS absolutely refused his prams until about 4 months anyway. I'd done the first time mother thing and had 2! All he needed was the stretchy Close Caboo, and somewhere safe to put him down at home (Moses basket worked for us). We co slept out of choice so even easier. I really wouldn't bother with a pram! Hope it all goes well.

I have two dc and a giant double buggy. Because taking a buggy and two DCs out for a walk is such a hassle dd (now 12 weeks) is in the sling about 90% of the time. She doesn't like being in the buggy much either. A decent back pack and a stretchy sling (my Moby is my favourite) is really all you need.

I would have been lost without pram. Mine wasn't keen on a sling and rocking him to sleep in the pram in the early days was needed in the daytime . I spent a lot of time walking places with the pram and would have found a sling too much to have to carry constantly. It depends how much you plan to go out. I could have coped without a sling however - very rarely used it.

Just wanted to chime in and say watching this thread with interest as I'm in exactly the same boat, OP. We should start a pregnant expat thread. We could call it Prexpat. Seriously though I have been also thinking really don't need a pram as where I live it's too hot for walks and sidewalks too rough. I suspect we will be using slings/carrier for ages. But unfortunately I just bought a m+p Zoom in my excitement that's waiting at my mum's house. Oops.

Friends of ours were planning a move abroad when baby was 8-12weeks n chose to buy a sling n not a pram and had a second hand crib and just managed as they didn't live near family to borrow stuff and didn't want hassle of selling or getting rid of stuff or the wasted money.

All these responses really useful, seem to be slightly in favour of sling and no pram so far, which sounds promising, but also sounds like it may depend on the baby...

Yeah I'm not planning to take a pram back with us.

Burmama yeah, we should! I spend time on the Living Abroad threads looking for answers to things, but it's not as active over there. Are you also going back to the UK to give birth?

Back to Ireland in T-minus three weeks and counting. I'll be just gone 30 weeks and it's a 12 hr flight I think a Prexpat thread would be so useful, bet there's more of us out there

Personally I couldn't deal with just a sling when out: it's ok for short trips but if you are out long enough to need to eat and use the loo I find them a right pain. You end up just not being able to do anything you need to do for yourself because you have a baby attached to you. Clothes shopping? Impossible to try anything on. Much as I hate clothes shopping I was forced to do a fair amount of it post-partum. Stopping for a coffee? don;t spill it on the baby attached to you, which might be easier said than does if they wriggle as much as my DS.

My DS is 12 weeks old, loves the sling, HATES the pushchair. This may change when he is a bit older, but at the moment he has been in his pushchair for a total of about 60 minutes, and crying for all of them. So it has worked out so far at about £10 per minute of misery for him being in there....I really would try and manage if you can, particularly as newborns need to lie flat in pushchairs with carrycot type seats and so cheap out and about versions aren't strictly suitable if you would use it a lot.

I do agree with sleeplessbunny, though, it is limiting. I had to buy shoes by sitting down in a shoe shop with baby attached while DH put various pairs on my feet! But still easier for me than having a baby screaming in a pram...the difficulty is you don't really know what your little one will like before he arrives.

Sorry, reading that back it sounds really unhelpful. I just want to get across that it can be quite annoying not having anywhere to put the baby down when you are out. At least that is my experience.

Also some babies are better than others in slings. DS was OK if he was asleep but if awake he would get restless and just kick and wriggle until I took him out.

Agree it depends on the baby. But never by a new pram, they are £££ and sooo much cheaper second hand. Everyone gets annoyed with travel systems (which usually have a lie flat pram) once the baby is 6months old and flogs them for a lighter pushchair so they go super cheap on ebay or local fb selling sites.

I didn't use a pushchair or pram with DD for the first few months. I'd consider making contingency plans in case you are left with injuries after the birth which would make using a sling harder. I had a theoretical pushchair picked out and knew that I could get it delivered in 24 hours if I needed it. I did end up buying it when DD was around 4 months old and there was a lot of ice on the pavements.

Molly that's a great point about injuries, you never know.

Seriously hope I'm not out clothes shopping as it's not in the budget, but thanks for the good points.

Burmama there are definitely more and we'd also have a chance of finding people in similar regions, so similar circumstances to navigate. Set one up! But where to put it? Antenatal clubs? Living overseas?

Coming back at 30 weeks is fab, shouldn't be too uncomfortable. I'm not planning to return until 34....makes me nervous but i feel bad enough for DH as it is! How long are you waiting until you return?

I'll join the pregnant expats too! Do you have a pram / pushchair that you'll use where you live? I think long term you definitely need something. Have you considered getting a chassis that the car seat can fit onto? You might be able to get that cheap second hand, depending on your car seat. Also it's free to take a pram/buggy on a plane when you have a child's ticket so no issues with taking it with you.

Ok that's three and counting! I guess Antenatal clubs...? Living Overseas is just so quiet.... Haven't decided yet how long will stay. DH is constrained because he only has one month leave - he will come to Ireland when I am 38 weeks - and he def has to get back. I am thinking it will be too hard to be away from him after baby arrives so will prob end up going back sooner than I would otherwise.... Not easy. How are you managing?

Done. Not sure how to link to it but it's in Antenatal clubs - pregnant expats. Anna and Rainbow and anyone else, come join!

Regarding slings, i tried several types with dd and she bloody hated them all. Would wriggle and squirm and kick and scream. Even now at 1 years old she loves her pram!

I haven't used prams with my DC until they are around 1 year old, because they have liked to be carried! So wwraps/carriers all the way. BUT if you are hoping (which you probably will be!) that occasionally your mum might take the baby out for 45 mins, might be worth considering whether she would feel comfortable with a carrier. Some grans don't, in my experience.