What WOULD you liked to be asked when you're pregnant?

[breakfastinbread]

There are gazillions of threads on here about annoying questions to ask pregnant ladies:

"Would you prefer a boy or a girl?"
"Ooh aren't you big/small/neat/fat etc"
"Was it planned?"
"Ah, another boy/girl - you must be disappointed?"

and so on...

I don't generally mind people asking me stupid questions at the moment (am 19+1) but am aware that most people are trying to make conversation or haven't been around a pregnant woman in some time and are a just bit thoughtless.

So what WOULD you like people to say to you when you're pregnant? Or would you just prefer them to ignore you and your bump?

Something non-pregnancy related. Like normal! So just "how are you?" (without head tilt)

I'd like them to say 'oh, congratulations!' or some other sign they are happy for me. And then don't ask about genders and so on, just show they are pleased for me and hope I/the baby is well, then talk like normal.

A happy 'when are you due?' is nice or a how are you feeling in this heat?

I don't get too offended by daft comment tbh.

"What do you think of the election results?" "How is Murray doing in the tennis" "Have you booked a nice holiday this year?"

ie talked to like a normal human being and not an incubator.

"Do you want to put your feet up while I make you a cuppa?"

I don't mind the pregnancy questions too much! Ones I like are: "Would you like to sit down?" on public transport... and "Ooh, where is your dress from?!"

Anything non pregnancy related is good.

I saw an old friend at the weekend who doesn't have children, and isn't very in to children... it was so nice to talk about normal things with someone I've known a long time. Argued about books and films, went to listen to blues, drank a tiny beer, did normal things. No one asked about childcare costs or how I was feeling.. lush.

Non pregnancy related chat is good.

I don't want anyone commenting on my appearance of checking what sex I want or any other nonsense

A work friend asked me to go with her to get a treatment done at local mini spa. That was very welcome :)

I'd like people to want to know the answer. So if you ask me how my pregnancy is going and I say a bit bumpy (no pun intended!) you don't then look all sheepish and leave ASAP. I'm not going to say its fab just to please you, why can't I acknowledge that it's hard.

I don't mind all the usual questions, when's it due, what are you having, how are you feeling etc, I work in a very customer based job and get all these questions several times a day from complete strangers, it's the scare monger stories that a few follow up with that are annoying I.e Ooo when my baby was born the cord was wrapped around the neck blah blah blah. People are interested and that's lovely, but the near death stories just arnt required

I also prefer conversations that aren't based around pregnancy. A simple 'how are you' is fine, but now I'm 25 weeks there are some people who seem to forget that my life doesn't entirely revolve around being pregnant and that I do occasionally have other things to think / talk about as well.

Agree with everyone else - non pregnancy related stuff is nice!
Much as it's nice for the pregnancy to be acknowledged, it's nice for people to remember there is more to life than the bump!

I'd like someone on a crowded bus/train to say 'would you like my seat?' I'm 30 weeks and obviously pregnant yet I stand on the bus whenever I get on it. Yes Edinburgh I'm talking to you!

My DS is 1 month old now but I'd have absolutely loved it if one of my friends or family had said , can I paint your toenails? Or would you like me to rub you back/shoulders/feet?
My best friend is 32 weeks now and I keep offering her exactly these things !

How are you staying so slim?

If one more person tells me how 'well' I'm looking or how massive I am I'm going to scream!

Which room of your house would you like me to clean first? Shall i get up before 6am with the 2 year old?
Your back hurts, tell me about it and how can I help?

All brilliant, yet sadly never asked questions.

Do you want me to come over and keep ohs mom company so you and oh can have some quality time?
Do you want a hand with cleaning?
What meals do you like? (Here is said meals so you can freeze)
No no what do you want from town and I'll get it for you.
Is there anything you would like?

If people could just stop looking at my bump before even greeting me (mil actually greats bump before saying anything to my face grrr) a nice how are you or anything non pregnancy some of the time would be lovely.

Would you like some cake?

I don't mind anyone asking me about pregnancy at all. In fact, I quite like it. The only things that I don't like are being told I look huge. I also feel uncomfortable that so many people seem to stare at my bump - but I understand it's hard not to. I am guilty of doing the same to others!

"You don't look pregnant!" deluded

I second youaremyrain suggestion , can i make you a cup of decaffeinated tea while you put your feet up?
I had bad morning all day sickness so the offer of someone cooking ds (2) his tea with me tagging along would have been lovely. I didn't want childcare just not need to put my head in the fridge!

Pah. No one ever talks to me about being pregnant, especially at work. Now I'm 23 weeks and have a bump, I tell THEM, and they say "really?" and then move on to something else. I wouldn't mind a bit of interest!

Red I'd like to be asked whether I want decaff or not! I hoard my one cup of real a day, when people assume "it's not the 1st cup she must want decaff" and make me the wrong tea I get a bit put out. I can count: no need to protect me from myself.