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Original poster

Work stress - Am I being pathetic?

13 replies

Pickles106 · 20/03/2014 14:28

I'm 15 weeks pregnant - whilst work has been pretty bad for a while (too much pressure, too little resources) over the few months - following the resignation of 3/4 of my team/ intro new system - it's got really awful.

The strongest member of my team leaves tommorrow and I'll be left with two junior staff, the prospect of training up two new staff alongside managing 20 freelancers on a new system.

I can appreciate that the early stages of pregnancy are exhausting, but I don't want to be working myself in the ground for a company that has little regard for its employees. Last September my husband and I choose to end a pregnancy as the baby was unwell, so I want to embrace this pregnancy rather than spending the evenings and weekends sleeping.

Anyway this week I got a horrid bug/cold and have taken the last four days off ( well three days if you count the two mornings I spent working at home as there was no one else who could do it).

Just wanted to know whether I being silly? Have got doctor app next week to see if they can my hours to 8-4 each day

OP posts:
sleeplessbunny · 20/03/2014 15:46

I think you just need to be careful to protect yourself from taking on too much. Now is not a great time to resign if you will be relying on mat pay and want to go back to this job, so personally I would stick it out but with very clear boundaries over what I was and wasn't willing to do (hours & responsibilities). If that falls short of what the management is expecting, then it is up to them to fill in the holes that have appeared. In your shoes I would probably set up a meeting with my superior and/or HR to explain my concerns about short staffing, making it clear what I was expecting to contribute and asking them what their plans were to make up the shortfall.

Stress at work is no good for anyone, pregnant or not. Best wishes for this pregnancy.

Original poster
Pickles106 · 20/03/2014 15:52

Thanks sleepless - I'm definitely not going to resign (I'm only sticking out for the maternity pay, not sure I want to return). I've spoken to HR and my manager repeatedly but HR seemed inclined to express my concerns but make no recommendations.... I think I'm going to try reducing my hours to 8-4 and list all the pressure points (again) with my manager.

OP posts:
sleeplessbunny · 20/03/2014 16:17

If you feel you are not being listened to then make sure you get your concerns down in writing, even if it is just an email summarising your meeting and the outcome. And then just stick to your guns. It does make it a bit easier if you are not invested in career progression with them post mat-leave. Good luck :-)

LePetitPont · 20/03/2014 16:35

Sorry to hear this, pickles. Sounds like y are doing exactly the right thing to put you and your baby first but can totally understand that pressures of work can be incredibly difficult to dodge.

What would happen if you just worked your contracted hours, didn't take work home, just pulled back etc? They are going to be in a position to cope when you are on mat leave. By continuing to take on the volume of work, you are enabling them to continue not to listen to you.

Sorry if that sounds harsh! I am lucky to have a supportive manager and have scaled back my hours to max 2 nasty days with his understanding. Good luck Smile

Gen35 · 20/03/2014 17:32

I agree with the above, reducing your hours per the dr isn't going to stop you taking it too seriously, you don't think you'll go back, you're not terribly well, time to stop trying to fix every problem and just do what you can in the time you are there and then forget it. If they can't hold onto staff it obviously isn't a great place to work.

emmajbxxx · 20/03/2014 18:45

Have you had a risk assessment?!

Original poster
Pickles106 · 20/03/2014 19:15

Yep had risk assessment, but it was very much on me e.g She has expressed concern about her hours and staffing. But HR gave no recommendations or any support which was disappointing

My contracted hours are 8-5.30. I'm currently leaving at 5 because it's exhausting, hence why I was going to see if doctor recommends reducing hours to 8-4 so I feel less exhausted

But yes LePetiont and Gen35 I need to stop taking things on and stand my ground

OP posts:
Original poster
Pickles106 · 20/03/2014 19:16

Argh auto correct LePetitPont

OP posts:
Gen35 · 21/03/2014 08:38

fwiw I've been in a similar situation and after a couple of weeks it gets a lot easier not to take all job related issues personally and look at the options that don't involve you committing to extra work. You can do it!

CarlyKins · 21/03/2014 15:15

You are definitely not being silly, you need to look after yourself and your baby and the last thing you need is pressure at work stressing you out. I started a new job the week I got pregnant (although didn't actually find out was pregnant until 5 months lol) but the amount of stress I went through with the job was unreal it was horrible. So much to the point where I still can't believe my baby is ok. After finding out I was expecting I worked a bit longer and then packed it in because my boy comes first and it wasn't worth risking his health. I really think you should speak to your boss and explain the situation, especially given what u went through last year (really sorry to hear u had to go through that). Hope u manage to work something out good luck x

Original poster
Pickles106 · 21/03/2014 18:35

Ahhh just get text from boss asking if I can rearrange cover for next Friday as she's given the only sodding person available to work early the day off. Well....

OP posts:
Minimou · 22/03/2014 09:11

No you're definitely not being pathetic. I was in a similar situation and probably like yourself, very concerned about my duties, doing a good job etc. But you have to stop thinking like that and put yourself and your baby first. The company does not care about you and will take what it can from you. The more you do, the more you will be expected to do. Especially since you are not wanting a career with them going forward. It's not worth it. You have to start saying, no, I do not have time to do x y or z. I am too busy. Let the work go undone. Who cares? It's not your problem. At the moment you are being conscientious and covering the work, so they don't see the need to get anyone else in. If you stop covering the work, I reckon pretty quickly they will get in extra support. That's what happened for me, anyway. Good luck with it, be strong!

Minimou · 22/03/2014 09:13

Say no to boss. Tell her to rearrange it as she has created the problem. Honestly, I know it is hard, but you have to start saying 'no' to unreasonable demands.

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