He's just there. Constantly.
And when he eats he's got the loudest mouth in the world 
Am 39 weeks and want him to stop touching my bump every 30 seconds or trying to hold my hand when I'm sat on the bloody sofa.
And I don't want to have to listen to incessant fucking chatter about the bastard snooker. I want to be left alone to mumsnet in peace!
[disclaimer - I loves him really!]