Baby shower questions?

[floppops]

My mum wants me to have a baby shower.. It's my second DC.
I'm not hugely keen as I know people often think it's a grabby event just for presents and won't want to come.
My mum wanted to have it at her house but that's an hour away from me and most of my friends except one.
So I've suggested a cafe nearby. I'm also thinking about having it in the morning after the school/nursery drop off as two thirds of my friends are either self employed with flexible hours or stay at home mums. Just thought it would be easier for them not to have to organise childcare and also the cafe/parking etc would be quieter? Or should it always be a weekend?? I like the idea of it being a girly coffee morning at a cafe and would organise a big platter of cakes.
Also I'd like to say presents arent obligatory but in a casual way? Any suggestions?

If you don't want presents to be obligatory, then don't call it a shower (as that is short for "shower with gifts", and normally is to mark your transition to motherhood).

If you give your party some other name, then you can do what you want, whenever you want.

My friends threw me & another mum a surprise baby shower, we'd organised a mums night out dinner at local restaurant and they organised a few games. No-one brought gifts or presents but they did get some fabric pens and drew & wrote messages all over a baby vest for each of us. Very thoughtfull and lots of fun & minimal expense.

If you word your invite as a coffee & cake morning before you are too big to get out the house & sleep deprived due to a newborn then it should be the low key sort of thing you are after.