Lack of help from Government

[Applepiesky]

Need to have a bit of a rant!
I work full time, my partner works part time (he would love to have full time hours but none available at the moment) and we have a mortgage, and consider ourselves very lucky to have one as I know many people don't.
I'm really really worried about how we are going to be able to pay our mortgage/bills/afford to live once baby comes in December.
I believe I only get 6wks full pay from work and then straight on to SMP. this literally will not even come close to touching our mortgage/bills payments, even taking DPs wages into consideration, let alone be enough to feed and clothe a newborn baby!
So why is it that people on benefits are entitled to a one off grant of £500 towards child costs and also non-home owners get help with rent? It really really annoys me that us hard working citizens are the forgotten ones and I am starting to shit myself at the thought of not being able to pay my mortgage :-(

Ehricloves why the F should Government pay for you to make landlords even richer??
We happened to save for years and now cut back massively in every other area to afford out mortgage but prefer this than paying into landlords pockets and thus creating the situation we now have with perma renters contributing to the fact there is a serious shrotage of available housing. Get off your high horse.

Absolutely Paperclips.... the OP (who isn't saying much) needs to realise this and stop jumping the gun and attacking others with her ill-informed views.

It is hard for EVERYONE (almost) regardless of situation and so she should be directing her anger and frustrations at the government as per the title of her post... and not bashing others who are also struggling.

Jemima you are totally clueless and naive. Who wants to line the pockets of landlords???? I sure as hell don't. But I can't get social housing. Don't you know about this fundamental issue of SHORTAGE in the UK??? Unfortunately I have no choice but to line my F landlord's pocket..... WE NEED A ROOF OVER OUR HEADS.

Well done OP!!!!! You have succeeded in raising the blood pressures of several pregnant ladies on here and yet you, yourself, appear to have disappeared!!!!

Did you kick up this shit storm just for a hoot...?!?!?!?

:-D :-D :-D

I agree that the government should really help working parents, as is the case in a lot of countries. I'm very lucky to get 6 months maternity leave at full salary thanks to my employer; if it was the statutory minimum of 6 weeks there's no way I could afford to stay home for more than 2 months (and we probably wouldn't have gone down the baby route just yet).

My biggest gripe is childcare though. It's not funded at all - most EU countries subsidise it. We'll be paying £1,070 a month - which is a very average amount in our area. We rent privately which costs much more than a mortgage on a similar property in this area would be. So that combined with childcare means we won't be able to save for a deposit until the child is at least 5.

I do agree that we are very lucky that we're both fit and healthy and can work.

I don't think the government should help pay people's mortgage though. As others have said, it's an asset. You can always sell your asset and rent. I don't agree with your "people who rent get help" - we rent - it costs a fucking fortune; we have no stability as LL can always decide to chuck us out (as has happened to us before) or doesn't do any repairs (again, happened to us more than once and for the amount I pay a month I don't accept to be living in a mouldy, damp house because the LL is too tight to do anything about it, so you end up having to move anyway). At least if you own the place as long as you pay you can stay. And you know how much you'll be paying year after year. We don't have that stability and I'm dreading next year already in case our LL wants to put the rent up (which we won't be able to afford).

OP, to be fair "only 6 months of maternity leave" is still a lot. The country where I'm from you only get 3 months and if you're unlucky and have to stay home earlier because of pregnancy complications, those weeks get taken off your allowance after the birth. I'll be home for 6 months too and I feel very grateful.

did you not give this some thought before you decided to start a family? Babies are expensive, and don't get any cheaper as they get older. They are a luxury, not a right - why should the government give you any help?

Oh the irony! I sympathize with you OP. Regardless of the stick coming this way re benefits bashing, I know plenty of full time workers on good salaries who are cash poor due to high outgoings, mainly a mortgage, unable to get in on the affordable housing act. Yes a mortgage SHOULD result in equity WHEN YOU SELL, but given the housing market since 2007, this is not the case for many home owners.

I also know of plenty people who have a number of DC who have given NO THOUGHT whatsoever to money before they started their family!

We can mud sling all we like here from both sides, but we will all insist our POV is correct!

However, I would certainly like £1200/mth benefits, that's more than I take home working full time, oh and my mortgage is more than your rent!

Save hard OP, it's the only way.

Chocolate makes you fat, so does wine, you don't get anything for nothing or do you? life's a bitch eh?

I don't think the op meant to cause offence! And in fairness what she put was not that ppl don't deserve help it was just that she is worried and resentful that there's not a lot out there for herself to get help! Also she did mention that she is grateful partner has pt hours!!! I think ppl are being unfair to the op!! There's no need to have a full on rant at her just because she is worried how she ll cope!
as others have said op make sure you claim child benefit and tax credits, also you could look into working tax credit for your partner depending on how many hours they work :) also the help with the mortgage interest is only applicable If your in reciept of an Income based benefit like income support, job seekers allowance income based or employment and support allowance income related, obviously don't know the full extent of op circs but doubt they would apply with you getting smp and partner Woking pt, you should talk to CAB for advice

Whether your on benefits or not times are tough for everyone, I have no idea how ppl cope on benefits the government need to make some serious changes!!! I feel for everyone who has to rely on the benefit system in this country! Think ppl should cut the op some slack as I said I'm sure she hasn't meant to cause offence :) x

Apparently only people who work are told why didn't they think before they got pregnant.

It is galling though to see others being handed grants and money every month for something that is essentially a lifestyle choice and the OP is allowed to state that. However outcomes for children on benefits are not as good so would you truly want to be on them?

Everyone should look at their finances before deciding to have a child or more children. Maternity pay, childcare costs etc can all be found within a few minutes google so its not like they hide the information. Is there any chance of you putting some money aside to cover some of the SMP weeks?

If you will struggle then your OH will coud take on a second job or try harder to secure full time work. Perhaps it may be a blessing he works part time as you may save on childcare if he is home most of the week.

Jemima
Ehricloves why the F should Government pay for you to make landlords even richer?? We happened to save for years and now cut back massively in every other area to afford out mortgage but prefer this than paying into landlords pockets and thus creating the situation we now have with perma renters contributing to the fact there is a serious shrotage of available housing. Get off your high horse.
You think I like this situation? I could never have saved enough to get a mortgage, never. I don't like renting and I think the industry sucks, I think btl has been a blight on society but I don't see how my needing somewhere to live is contributing to the shortage of housing? Logic fail I think.
The government shouldn't be paying to make landlords richer but they (collectively) allowed a situation whereby it's easy to get a btl mortgage and whack the rents sky high so don't blame renters for the situation. We are mostly as pissed off as anyone else and poorer to boot.
Getting a mortgage might be cheaper than renting but you still need £20k plus to get one. Not possible for most of us.

Gilly- your opinion may differ from mine but please don't get so personal with comments calling me "clueless and naive" both of which I am not ...I don't appreciate your verbal attacks. Calm down.

My partner and I are renting a 2 bed bungalow for 700 a month plus all bills tax gas food water about 1,100 a month in total. My oh earns 1700 a month after tax and i earn 1000. That leaves us with 1,500 a month to spend/save whatever. We are lucky in the sense that we should still have 800 a month left over when im on maternity allowing me to have a year off. I am 20 he is 25 so we are quite lucky compared to some people and im very greatful i dont think well be entitled to help either, if it was different i know my oh would spend 20 hours a day working to support us so im very greatful. I dont believe everyone that is recieving help should however i know there are sone genuinely in great need and i hope they do get the help they are in desperate need. I am sure you will manage however if i wasnt so lucky with pur income i would not have a child untill id saved enough to be ok

hi op sorry about your situation lots of people are the same though im on a low income myself and expecting how ever i knew this before ttc and ive bought from a early stage of pregnancy can you maybe borrow some baby things off friends? also look on ebay and nearly new sales good prices for great baby items fraction of the cost of the shops take care

Wow wow wow!!
The reason I'm "not saying much" gilly is cos I have just come back online so hadn't seen the responses !

I am not interested in an argument with ANYONE but how dare you accuse me of attacking you? Or anyone for that matter? You're right, I don't know your circumstances but you certainly don't know mine either. I chose to share as little of my personal situation as possible but the fact is my life is a hell of a lot tougher than you might think so there's no need to judge.

For those of you who have congratulated me on my pregnancy - THANK YOU - it really is a gift! Congratulationa to you all, too. And I can understand that people say having children is a luxury, I agree, but this was an unplanned pregnancy!! So think that's a bit unfair to say that we should have thought about our finances before starting a family.

For the record we are saving every single penny we can, my DP has got a second job and I am returning to work 3 months after due date so the luxury I will be missing out on is my child :-/

I am really sorry if I offended anyone, that certainly wasnt my intention - thank you to those who have offered a bit of advice and support but like I said, I never came here for an argument - just a bit of a rant which we are ALL guilty of from time to time - I mean, come on, we are hormonal !! ;-)

nicely said OP.

can I rant to? just to prove a point that everyones situation is different, my DH and I are perfectly capable of affording a mortgage but we were refused one due to my DH's credit history from years ago. So, to sum up, theres the ones that cant afford a mortgage and are on housing benefit, the ones that have a mortgage but then have the fear there house will be re possessed if they don't keep up payments, and the ones who can afford a mortgage cant bloody get one and are paying out £725 a month rent, yippee!!
I'd say all of these situations are equally frustrating in different ways.

I just think that there should be a simpler way to find out what we are entitled to, whatever situation we are in.
Benefits and tax credits etc are there to try and get everyone earning less to at least be able to manage, almost to level out the playing field so to speak. I do think some people take advantage, but the government need to sort that out to ensure that the money goes to people who deserve it.

I am currently 20 weeks with my first and my dh lost his job almost as soon as we found out (this was very much a planned pg but dh losing his job was not) Being a teacher we hoped he would find another job, but after lots of interviews he was unsucessful.
I find it hard to see what we will be entitled to as he is a teacher so will hopefully get supply work, but that means some weeks he might work and others he wont. Things should be made much easier for people to understand to ensure that people get what they are entitled to. We own our own home, but will be relying on savings to keep afloat and my sister is loaning me anything she can for our baby.
It will be tough but i know that there are lots more people in much harder situations.

It is definitely the governments responsibility to make sure that people know whtat they are entitled to and are able to live a reasonable life. No one should struggle paying for food to feed their family etc. Other posters are right that situations change unexpectedly and as long as you are trying to get yourself into a better situation then you should be supported whilst you try.

^^ thumbs up Chunderella

I fell pregnant accidentally at 23 in a fairly new relationship, fresh out of uni. I'm very aware that things could have gone very differently for me and there was a very real possibility that I would have had to rely on benefits.

Luckily, a few years later I am in the fortunate position of being in a decent job with my own home, a high earning husband and another child.

Aren't most of us supposed to be a divorce or an accident or a redundancy away from disaster? The help is there for you too if you should need it one day - why would you begrudge it to anyone in the situation that they have to claim benefits? It's right that those who can afford to should pay for themselves. If you are going to be in as much difficulty as you think then you will probably be entitled to tax credits which is government help really isn't it?

So why is it that people on benefits are entitled to a one off grant of £500 towards child costs and also non-home owners get help with rent? It really really annoys me that us hard working citizens are the forgotten ones

Sorry Op but this is what pissed me off in your OP.

Supposing someone came on here and complained about all the lazy sods who get pregnant accidentally and then claim child benefit???? Hmmm?

Equating someones financial position with how hard they work is a shit thing to say.

I think you should have posted in AIBU.

I think it's crazy we get any help at all. I'm self employed, and to be honest, more than happy to be receiving £136 a week maternity allowance for the 4 months I'll be taking off work. No one forced me to have a baby, it was my choice and I've saved like crazy since I found out I was expecting. Neither me or my DH are on high wages but we budget.

There will always be people who milk the system, it's not fair and it's annoying but some people do really need the help. No point in getting yourself worked up about it all. Just get saving what you can now. And at least if your partner is only part time you won't have to rely on full time childcare when you do go back to work

Dh was still a student when I fell preg with ds1 and made redundant when dc2 was 6 months!
We never got any help with our rent. Good job we'd saved really.

I think the OP's points are that her and her partner are up against it financially. She is angry as the common perception is that those who don't work (and by default often pay rent and not a mortgage) can have children as and when they want as the government will give them all sorts of hand outs that enables them to have children and not worry too much about the cost of them.

I think it's a very simplistic point to make but I know many people who would like to have more than one child but because of child care costs, needing to pay a mortgage and other bills means they cannot afford to.

The media does a great job of presenting those who receive benefits as scroungers and feckless regardless of their individual circumstances. For those who don't receive any financial help from the government this will seem unfair.

I think the OP should be allowed a rant; regardless of whether someone owns a house, is mortgaged or pays rent having a child IS expensive and we don't always choose when to conceive. The OP is doing all the right stuff to be able to afford her child and basically I wish her well.

Here's a thought; maybe the government shouldn't give anyone any help with their children. Get rid of tax credits, childcare, child benefit etc and then only those who really can afford a child will have one?

xenadog ....... Thank you!! You've hit the nail on the head!
Like I said before, I never meant to cause such disruption and maybe my post came across not how I wanted it to but xenadog has put it into perspective and I was just having a pregnant rant!
Just feel very alone in terms of financially having to cope when others seem to have it so easy.